I seriously could have smacked my DH tonight!

I am sitting here racking my brain about how to pay the mortgage for next month, and he tells me how "mad" BM ex is because we haven't paid her the full amount of CS for the past 2 months! We have paid her the full amount, on time forever, even when he lost his job and was out of work for 3 months, We only stopped paying the full amount 2 months ago when his business esentially went under. We have since been paying 1/2. IMO, that is all we should pay anyway, since SS dropped out of schoo,l is 19 yrs old, and is working full time!

She's mad?!?!? Ya know what, so am I!!!! I am mad that we have been paying when we weren't supposed to for a year because DH didn't want to hear her big fat mouth start flapping! I am mad that my dumbazz DH thinks her b!thing is more important than mine! I am mad that BM salary has doubled since the divorce decree and DH's has gone down and we still pay the same every month. I am the maddest because he defends her - YES, you read right, he defends HER saying she "has beeen nice for the past 2 mos" She hasn't been "nice"! Given our current financial situation, if she took him to court, she wouldn't get a fraction of what we are even giving her now!!!! I seriously give up.... All I know is that you can't get blood from a stone....

Vent over, I guess.....

Message edited 2/24/2009 12:45:42 AM.

Re: I seriously could have smacked my DH tonight!

Re: I seriously could have smacked my DH tonight!

You have to file a motion to have the CS amended. You can do this in cases where your DH has change in/loss of work.
Stand up for yourself! You two are already arguing over the issue so what do you care if the topic is going to cause tension. I understand that he wants to be the "good Dad" but right now he is being a bad DH and irresponsibble to his own family by letting Ex & Son milk him dry!
I might be wrong but at 19 and NOT a full-time student..aren't your obligations towards CS over?

Re: I seriously could have smacked my DH tonight!

I agree with the PP, at 19 and not a fulltime student, DH's CS obligations should be over. It would be different if financially he could do it, but it seems that is not the case and he needs to think about you and your young child and your home.

I would be just as angry as you are, I too know what it is like to have a DH defend the BM and it is so hurtful and makes things harder to discuss.

Good Luck

Re: I seriously could have smacked my DH tonight!

You have every right to be MAD! I don't understand why he continues to pay CS if he doesn't have to?

Re: I seriously could have smacked my DH tonight!

DH needs to stop making excuses for her and really needs to step up to his obligations to you as a Husband and to DS as a father.

Enough is enough. If the ex wasn't making more than enough to support the SD and SS it would be one thing. But she does.

DH needs to man up and pay his responsibilities to the problems here and now as in your mortgage, DS's formula, diapers, etc.

Re: I seriously could have smacked my DH tonight!

Message edited 11/23/2011 5:07:55 PM.

Re: I seriously could have smacked my DH tonight!

Thanks everyone! He just feel like if he stops paying CS for SS, BM wil throw him out of the house. (She has already tried by calling the cops to try to get him out already, because she "doesn't like his attitude") Yes, folks that is what we are dealing with here

Dont forget though, she is being "nice" by accepting less...

Re: I seriously could have smacked my DH tonight!

That IS annoying. I can totally understand where you are coming from. I would be so furious also. It's such a struggle to maintain a healthy balance in these situations to keep the peace. I hope it all works out for you.