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Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

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Mrs213
????????

Member since 2/09

18986 total posts

Name:

Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

Or everyone want no kids.

I always thought I wanted children but sometimes I really don't think I have it in me to be someone's mother...Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 6/13/10 9:35 PM
 

maxsgirl
LIF Adult

Member since 1/06

2086 total posts

Name:
sarah

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

I do think there are a few that are either on the fence or currently childless but want in the future

Message edited 6/13/2010 9:59:19 PM.

Posted 6/13/10 9:59 PM
 

KittyKatCopper
missing my handsome boy

Member since 3/09

1579 total posts

Name:
Kat - HamptonsBride (LIW)

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

When I was younger I always wanted to get married, have kids & be a SAHM...then in my 20's all my friends got married & had kids (I was 34 when i got married.)...and I saw how it just takes over your time and life and realized it's not for me...i'm not saying it in a bad way...but i don't have the patience or energy to be someone's mom! God bless all the mommies! Chat Icon

Posted 6/13/10 11:26 PM
 

MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!

Member since 7/06

12020 total posts

Name:
MJ

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

there are definitely a bunch of ladies here who are CF for the moment and likely will have them (like myself) and other who are on the fence.

sometimes i go back and forth--but ultimately i'm sure we will have them.

Posted 6/14/10 12:04 PM
 

MrsFishstick
LIF Adult

Member since 5/10

935 total posts

Name:

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

Posted by staceyums81

Or everyone want no kids.

I always thought I wanted children but sometimes I really don't think I have it in me to be someone's mother...Chat Icon Chat Icon



ITA

Posted 6/14/10 12:04 PM
 

Mushesgirl
Too blessed to be stressed

Member since 4/09

6691 total posts

Name:

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

have never been on the fence, known pretty much my whole life i'd be the parent to furry kids. It's part of what brought dh and I together. That's kind of a deal breaker.

Posted 6/14/10 8:41 PM
 

blondiebabyZ
Ohhhh yeaaahh!!

Member since 6/10

1033 total posts

Name:

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

I used to think about it, but then reality hit me. They are expensive and my life will be over. All my shopping habits will need to be cut to a minimum bc they need toys, an education and clothes. I'd lose my social life and the freedom to just go as I please. All of which are things I dont want to give up. Id much have my dream home in Florida with a beautiful boat.

Posted 6/15/10 5:17 PM
 

Mushesgirl
Too blessed to be stressed

Member since 4/09

6691 total posts

Name:

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

Posted by blondiebabyZ

I used to think about it, but then reality hit me. They are expensive and my life will be over. All my shopping habits will need to be cut to a minimum bc they need toys, an education and clothes. I'd lose my social life and the freedom to just go as I please. All of which are things I dont want to give up. Id much have my dream home in Florida with a beautiful boat.



amen.Chat Icon

Posted 6/15/10 9:48 PM
 

Nifheim
allo

Member since 1/09

5476 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

oh i switch all the time. There are days I look at a toddler with their parents and go damn that looks so amazing, then there are the other times i go damn i would hate to be them.

I think I would be a parent if we were more financial stable but DH and i agree if we do have a child we will probably be criticized for our parenting methods, haha.

Posted 6/16/10 12:18 PM
 

blondiebabyZ
Ohhhh yeaaahh!!

Member since 6/10

1033 total posts

Name:

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

Posted by Nifheim

oh i switch all the time. There are days I look at a toddler with their parents and go damn that looks so amazing, then there are the other times i go damn i would hate to be them.

I think I would be a parent if we were more financial stable but DH and i agree if we do have a child we will probably be criticized for our parenting methods, haha.



I also would see a cute well-behaved child and at times thought "wow its cute, maybe a child wouldnt be so bad" THEN you see them begin to act up, cry and misbehave by doing all these obnoxious things and thats when reality hits, my bubble is popped and Im like ahhh nope...no kids.

Posted 6/16/10 2:00 PM
 

Andrewz00
Look! I changed it!

Member since 4/10

1789 total posts

Name:
Andrew

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

Posted by blondiebabyZ

Posted by Nifheim

oh i switch all the time. There are days I look at a toddler with their parents and go damn that looks so amazing, then there are the other times i go damn i would hate to be them.

I think I would be a parent if we were more financial stable but DH and i agree if we do have a child we will probably be criticized for our parenting methods, haha.



I also would see a cute well-behaved child and at times thought "wow its cute, maybe a child wouldnt be so bad" THEN you see them begin to act up, cry and misbehave by doing all these obnoxious things and thats when reality hits, my bubble is popped and Im like ahhh nope...no kids.





AHHH I LOVE YOU!! :)

Posted 6/16/10 2:52 PM
 

blondiebabyZ
Ohhhh yeaaahh!!

Member since 6/10

1033 total posts

Name:

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

Posted by Andrewz00

Posted by blondiebabyZ

Posted by Nifheim

oh i switch all the time. There are days I look at a toddler with their parents and go damn that looks so amazing, then there are the other times i go damn i would hate to be them.

I think I would be a parent if we were more financial stable but DH and i agree if we do have a child we will probably be criticized for our parenting methods, haha.



I also would see a cute well-behaved child and at times thought "wow its cute, maybe a child wouldnt be so bad" THEN you see them begin to act up, cry and misbehave by doing all these obnoxious things and thats when reality hits, my bubble is popped and Im like ahhh nope...no kids.





AHHH I LOVE YOU!! :)




Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 6/16/10 3:47 PM
 

maxsgirl
LIF Adult

Member since 1/06

2086 total posts

Name:
sarah

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

Posted by blondiebabyZ

Posted by Nifheim

oh i switch all the time. There are days I look at a toddler with their parents and go damn that looks so amazing, then there are the other times i go damn i would hate to be them.

I think I would be a parent if we were more financial stable but DH and i agree if we do have a child we will probably be criticized for our parenting methods, haha.



I also would see a cute well-behaved child and at times thought "wow its cute, maybe a child wouldnt be so bad" THEN you see them begin to act up, cry and misbehave by doing all these obnoxious things and thats when reality hits, my bubble is popped and Im like ahhh nope...no kids.



lol ahh this is exactly me...whenever I am out with my mother and I see a screaming child I always make sure to point it out to her and ask her why would I put myself thru that?

Posted 6/16/10 3:56 PM
 

PrincessVonTrockel
Trophy Wife in Training

Member since 11/09

2953 total posts

Name:
Natalie

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

Posted by blondiebabyZ

I used to think about it, but then reality hit me. They are expensive and my life will be over. All my shopping habits will need to be cut to a minimum bc they need toys, an education and clothes. I'd lose my social life and the freedom to just go as I please. All of which are things I dont want to give up. Id much have my dream home in Florida with a beautiful boat.





OMG This sounds like me!

Posted 6/20/10 11:32 PM
 

drpepper318
MIR MIR MIR!

Member since 6/07

8274 total posts

Name:
me

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

Yeah, I don't know if I have it in me to be a parent. I have enough anxiety in my life as it is (my own fault really), I imagine I'd be a nervous freaking wreck if I had kids to deal with/worry about too. Parenting seems really overwhelming to me, I think I'd become resentful. I'm going to have to see where we are in our lives in the next few years & take it from there.

Posted 6/21/10 9:21 PM
 

NASP09
...

Member since 6/05

6030 total posts

Name:

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

I go back and forth all the time. I do want kids someday, I think I would be a good mother, but on the other hand, I really enjoy my life right now. I enjoy taking hassle-free trips with DH where I dont have to shlep 18 extra things. I enjoy drinking with my friends until 1 AM on Saturday nights. During family functions, I enjoy being able to talk to my friends and family without being tethered to someone else who might be screaming, eating or pooping at any given time. I dont know if this means Im not "ready" for kids, but Im finally at a place where I truly enjoy my life, and Im a little reluctant to give that up.

Posted 6/22/10 8:38 PM
 

ThePinkGoose
In Your Hands

Member since 8/08

4706 total posts

Name:
Nunya

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

Posted by KittyKatCopper

When I was younger I always wanted to get married, have kids & be a SAHM...then in my 20's all my friends got married & had kids (I was 34 when i got married.)...and I saw how it just takes over your time and life and realized it's not for me...i'm not saying it in a bad way...but i don't have the patience or energy to be someone's mom! God bless all the mommies! Chat Icon



I just put up a post about this same exact thing!!!!!!!!! What a relief to hear someone else say it!






Chat Icon

Posted 6/24/10 1:10 PM
 

marianne13
LIF Adolescent

Member since 6/10

887 total posts

Name:

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

I'm on the fence. I never wanted kids but I eased up on the idea a little. I mean, if it really meant a lot to DH I would have one but I'm not sure if it's something I really want. I love the fact that we don't have any children..we can go on vacations, out to dinner, a movie, bar, anywhere without having to deal with child care. When I see people with their children I never feel like I wish I had that..and when I see a kid throwing a tantrum I feel so thankful that I don't have kids. Sometimes I really think I'm not a normal girl at all.

Posted 6/24/10 7:42 PM
 

LuvHelloKitty
LIF Infant

Member since 1/10

112 total posts

Name:
Liz

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

im approaching 35 and still no desire for kids..just too much of a hassle with time and money. maybe if i were a trust fund baby with rich parents and didn't need to work, I'd consider being a full time mom - but as it stands now, definitely not. We do ok with our finances now but if we have kids, we'd be relegated to lower middle class and not something i'd really want to raise my kid in.Chat Icon

Posted 6/28/10 10:26 PM
 

Mushesgirl
Too blessed to be stressed

Member since 4/09

6691 total posts

Name:

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

Posted by marianne13

I'm on the fence. I never wanted kids but I eased up on the idea a little. I mean, if it really meant a lot to DH I would have one but I'm not sure if it's something I really want. I love the fact that we don't have any children..we can go on vacations, out to dinner, a movie, bar, anywhere without having to deal with child care. When I see people with their children I never feel like I wish I had that..and when I see a kid throwing a tantrum I feel so thankful that I don't have kids. Sometimes I really think I'm not a normal girl at all.



I'm nowhere near normal thenChat Icon

Posted 6/28/10 10:49 PM
 

christinec2010
LIF Adolescent

Member since 10/09

637 total posts

Name:
Christine

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

DH & I are not TTC & do not plan on TTC for another few years because we are not set in our jobs yet & we do not have a home yet. However, all of our friends either have children or are expecting & its hard to be around them, because it makes me want to have a kid now. Meanwhile, we also love having the freedom of doing as we please still & being able to sleep late on the weekends.
I do have a nephew & two nieces so some days when I really want kids I "borrow" them for a couple of hours & then I remember part of why we are waiting.

Posted 6/29/10 2:44 PM
 

shadows
LIF Adult

Member since 1/10

4694 total posts

Name:

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

Posted by blondiebabyZ

I used to think about it, but then reality hit me. They are expensive and my life will be over. All my shopping habits will need to be cut to a minimum bc they need toys, an education and clothes. I'd lose my social life and the freedom to just go as I please. All of which are things I dont want to give up. Id much have my dream home in Florida with a beautiful boat.



I agree 100%... a study came out recently that it costs about $225,000 to raise a child to maturity (and that does not cover anything more than the bare minimun necessities). That's a down payment for a nice house, and maybe a Range Rover too!! lol I just don't find the thought of spending my money at Toys R Us and Gap Kids appealing... but that's me.

Posted 7/19/10 7:50 PM
 

MrsMick
Baby #2 debuts in March 2016!

Member since 9/09

1977 total posts

Name:
Michele

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

Posted by staceyums81

Or everyone want no kids.

I always thought I wanted children but sometimes I really don't think I have it in me to be someone's mother...Chat Icon Chat Icon



I felt the exact same way. Felt that I was too selfish to take care of someone else. Now being a wife for over a year, I slowly feel the urge to start a family BUT there are many things we want to do first before we start.

Posted 8/8/10 10:08 AM
 

MaZz
* Lovin my baby girl!!! *

Member since 2/09

6243 total posts

Name:
Gina

Re: Is anyone here on the fence about having kids?

Posted by NASP09

I go back and forth all the time. I do want kids someday, I think I would be a good mother, but on the other hand, I really enjoy my life right now. I enjoy taking hassle-free trips with DH where I dont have to shlep 18 extra things. I enjoy drinking with my friends until 1 AM on Saturday nights. During family functions, I enjoy being able to talk to my friends and family without being tethered to someone else who might be screaming, eating or pooping at any given time. I dont know if this means Im not "ready" for kids, but Im finally at a place where I truly enjoy my life, and Im a little reluctant to give that up.



you took the words right out of my mouth... this is exactly how me and DH are at the moment!

Posted 8/8/10 10:17 AM
 
 

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