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Pomegranate5
LIF Adult
Member since 2/11 4798 total posts
Name:
Pomegranate5
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People telling you to stay CF?
I see a lot of topics about CF couples getting negative comments about their decision to remain CF.....
Does anyone get a lot of POSITIVE comments? Or even people discouraging you from having kids?
That's the case for DH and I. Although I do hope to have children, when we were getting married so many people told us to hold off on having children for as long as possible, if ever. All we heard were horror stories about how hard it is rasing kids nowadays, how their marriages were negatively affected by their children, how they miss the "carefree" times before children, etc, etc, etc.
Just wondering if anyone else has this experience?
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Posted 3/9/11 10:33 AM  |
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Lisa
I'm a PANK!!!
Member since 5/05 22334 total posts
Name:
Professional Aunts No Kids
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Re: People telling you to stay CF?
My sister tells us all the time!
She has 3 kids...an 8 y/o girl and 4 y/o twin boys 4 y/o tells us to enjoy our CF life!
Its a joke with us, since I know she LOVES her children but I know she envies us (just a bit and not in a bad way) with some of the things that we do.
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| Posted 3/9/11 10:43 AM |
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Pomegranate5
LIF Adult
Member since 2/11 4798 total posts
Name:
Pomegranate5
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Re: People telling you to stay CF?
We've had quite a few couples with kids tell us that they don't regret having their children, BUT, if they were in our situation they wouldn't choose to have kids, or they would wait many years.
It's refreshing to know so many couples who see the advantages of staying childfree. We're lucky. We felt almost NO pressure after we got married to start making babies.
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| Posted 3/9/11 11:57 AM |
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Mushesgirl
Too blessed to be stressed
Member since 4/09 6691 total posts
Name:
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Re: People telling you to stay CF?
All our friends know the score with us; but new people we meet who ask us and we tell them no, not interested, trying to retire in 13 years, a lot of people say "That's cool!"
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| Posted 3/9/11 12:13 PM |
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MaZz
* Lovin my baby girl!!! *
Member since 2/09 6243 total posts
Name:
Gina
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Re: People telling you to stay CF?
I havent gotten that... I actually tell myself those things bc Im a FT nanny and I see how challenging it can be to raise a child... All the more reason why Im enjoying "us" time right now... I get to see both sides of it personally which helps alot!
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| Posted 3/9/11 3:46 PM |
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drpepper318
MIR MIR MIR!
Member since 6/07 8274 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: People telling you to stay CF?
Quite a few people have told us that, both people who have kids & people who don't. It's so refreshing! What a nice change from the usual pressure & reminder that I'm not getting any younger.
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| Posted 3/9/11 9:44 PM |
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jilliibabii
Mrs. O'Connor
Member since 6/10 12821 total posts
Name:
Jillian
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Re: People telling you to stay CF?
My mom doesn't tell me never to have kids, but not for another 4 years. She says she's too young to be a grandma. Same goes for MIL! I'm happy to oblige!
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| Posted 3/10/11 10:51 AM |
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MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!
Member since 7/06 12020 total posts
Name:
MJ
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Re: People telling you to stay CF?
Plenty of friends told us to just be married and enjoy each other before having kids. They were always the ones that had kids before marriage, or shortly thereafter! They all admitted that while they loved their kids, and wouldn't really change anything....they sometimes wish they had had more "couple" time early on.
Our first child will come this year, 9 years after we met, and 4 years after we were married.
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| Posted 3/10/11 3:21 PM |
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Cheeks24
Living a dream
Member since 1/08 8589 total posts
Name:
Cheeks
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Re: People telling you to stay CF?
No, we just kept getting asked when.
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| Posted 3/10/11 7:04 PM |
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Blazesyth
*yawn*
Member since 5/05 8129 total posts
Name:
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Re: People telling you to stay CF?
I've gotten a few "good for you guys" but mostly it's silence or people trying to convince us...
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| Posted 3/10/11 8:02 PM |
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Pomegranate5
LIF Adult
Member since 2/11 4798 total posts
Name:
Pomegranate5
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Re: People telling you to stay CF?
Posted by MrsPJB2007
Plenty of friends told us to just be married and enjoy each other before having kids. They were always the ones that had kids before marriage, or shortly thereafter! They all admitted that while they loved their kids, and wouldn't really change anything....they sometimes wish they had had more "couple" time early on.
This is exactly what a lot of people told us as well. A lot of the younger parents who had very little newlywed time before their kids arrived have actually pressured us to wait.
I almost feel guilty admitting to some of these people that we want to TTC.
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| Posted 3/11/11 9:38 AM |
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Re: People telling you to stay CF?
Posted by Mici C
No, we just kept getting asked when.
so do we. it's at a point where it's very annoying.
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| Posted 3/11/11 11:34 PM |
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Blazesyth
*yawn*
Member since 5/05 8129 total posts
Name:
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Re: People telling you to stay CF?
Posted by Sweetheart409
Posted by Mici C
No, we just kept getting asked when.
so do we. it's at a point where it's very annoying.
If you intend on remaining childfree - bite the bullet and tell them otherwise they won't stop. Some people also won't stop even when you say you are going to remain childfree, but most folks will.
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| Posted 3/12/11 7:12 AM |
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IrishLasss334
I'll be there soon!
Member since 1/08 6549 total posts
Name:
Patty
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Re: People telling you to stay CF?
We get comments from alot of people about how "lucky" we are to be DINK (double income no kids) - and have extra $$. From the people that don't know how hard we tried to have a baby, it doesn't bother me. From my idiot BIL who does not appreciate the 3 he has, and knows all about our IF, he annoys the sh!t out of me. He complains to my DH all the time about how much of a pain his kids are, he gets no time himself, blah blah blah...my DH once told him - ya know - 1. I would trade all that I have for one child and 2. you are being an insensitive d-bag considering you know we lost 3. But he still complains. Because he's anidiot.
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| Posted 3/14/11 8:43 AM |
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Pomegranate5
LIF Adult
Member since 2/11 4798 total posts
Name:
Pomegranate5
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Re: People telling you to stay CF?
Posted by IrishLass
We get comments from alot of people about how "lucky" we are to be DINK (double income no kids) - and have extra $$. From the people that don't know how hard we tried to have a baby, it doesn't bother me. From my idiot BIL who does not appreciate the 3 he has, and knows all about our IF, he annoys the sh!t out of me. He complains to my DH all the time about how much of a pain his kids are, he gets no time himself, blah blah blah...my DH once told him - ya know - 1. I would trade all that I have for one child and 2. you are being an insensitive d-bag considering you know we lost 3. But he still complains. Because he's anidiot.
Well that just sucks! Telling someone how lucky they are that they don't have something they want so badly?? Sorry, but he's a jerk.
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| Posted 3/15/11 9:51 AM |
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