Ten Years Ago

Right at this moment 10 years ago I was doing a loop around L&D in Southside Hospital. Walking, walking, walking.

I was past my due date and contracting every minute.. but they weren't STRONG contractions. Phooey.

In a little while from now they will discover that I'm severely dehydrated. I stopped eating and drinking because I was afraid to poop on the table during delivery. Yes - I was that dopey.

They will also discover that I have a bad UTI and figure that the labor was actually brought on by those 2 factors rather than by my kid being ready to exit stage south.

They'll put me on Pitocin and I won't care.

They'll break my water but it won't gush until later and I'll cry because I'll be convinced I wet myself. I won't get the absurdity of being embarrassed over that until later when I stop to think about just how sweaty and disgusting I was altogether.

They will keep telling me I'll have a baby by morning. Then by afternoon. Sometime around 6pm tomorrow they will tell me I am all the way there and drop some lights and tell me I can get ready to push.

And then the lights will go back up and my doctor will take off his catcher's mitt and tell me that my baby's head is just much too big and that I can't push or I'll tear my cervix.

My body will push anyway.

They'll stick needles in my back.. or try to. But it won't work and since it's escalated to an emergency situation they'll simply tie me down and knock me out.

Nurses will wake me up and I'll ask about my baby and they'll be vague outside of telling me the baby is perfectly healthy. I'll ask if it's a boy or a girl and they won't reveal. I'll ask if it's a hermaphrodite or a dwarf and I swear they will push me a little faster.

Rob will be holding our bundle. I'll ask him if it's a boy or a girl and he will tell me - with tears in his eyes - that we have a son. I'll ask what he looks like and he'll advise me that the boy has a Marge Simpson head and a mushroom nose. I will demand then that he hand over our child.

I will count his toes and his fingers and realize that he does indeed have a long blueish conehead and milia on his nose.

I will feel something like a panic attack.. a surge rising in my chest and spilling out of me in a wave that I don't know how to control.

I will realize that I am madly and unconditionally in love with the small human I hold in my arms.

I won't yet know that he'll be tested a genius level IQ someday
Or that he'll have a sarcastic streak a mile wide.
I won't know at that moment that he'll have awful vision and a brilliant smile.
I won't realize how stoic he will become.
I won't know that he'll oneday have a brother and love sports and want to play the saxophone and want to be a poet when he grows up.
I won't know all the little things that will make him who he is - the plethora of quirks and traits and characteristics that will steal my heart a little more each day - even the annoying things.

But I will know that I will kill for him, I will die for him and I will love him to the last breath I take.

Ten Years Ago my life changed irrevocably and I became a better human being because of it.

Happy Birthday To My Little Bear, My Love Bug, My Peanut Face, My Buddy, My Big Boy, My Robbie.

Re: Ten Years Ago

OK, I'm That was beautiful Jeannie Happy Birthday to your sweet boy Double digits is a BIG deal! I hope you guys have a blast today

Re: Ten Years Ago

Happy Birthday to DS! Hope you guys have a great day.

Re: Ten Years Ago

Re: Ten Years Ago

That was lovely! I hope you all enjoyed his birthday.

Re: Ten Years Ago

Happy birthday!!!!!
Happy double digits!!!
#10

Re: Ten Years Ago

Happy belated birthday to your wonderful boy!

Re: Ten Years Ago

Happy Birthday to your DS!!!!

Re: Ten Years Ago

awwww. I loved reading that! Happy Birthday Robbie!!!

Re: Ten Years Ago

Happy Birthday Robbie!! Hope his day was awesome!!!!!

Re: Ten Years Ago

Im hysterical.. beautiful