I am new here

Hi ladies,

I have never posted on LIF but I am a frequent lurker and an active 2011 bride from LIW.
I don't know if this is the place to write this but I didn't see any other loss boards except this one

I was recently diagnosed with a molar pregnancy. I had a D&C on July 12th. I was just shy of eleven weeks. I am not sure if its complete or partial. I didn't even know it was a molar pregnancy until a week after when I went to a previously scheduled prenatal visit and the attending physician said I couldn't ttc for a year.

Tonight I am just so angry at the doctors for not telling me anything no one explained anything until I finally asked. I am angry that they don't do sonograms until 16 weeks at this doctor because if they would have done it at 8, we could have caught it and I wouldn't have gone threw four days being doubled over in pain.

And I am scared that it is not over yet. I go in next Wednesday for my post op, I have to take monthly blood tests to make sure that the tissue isn't still growing and if my hgc levels don't go down there is talk of another d&C or chemo. I thought I was holding it together but something happened tonight that the flood gates just opened and I needed to get this out.

The physician said there was never a baby instead the sperm and egg grew into abnormal growth cells that continued to grow expanding the uterus. Knowing this makes me feel like I am wrong for being sad because I didn't lose a child, but I cant help it, for all that time I was becoming attached to something I thought was a baby. I got morning sickness, I was tired I had the symptoms and then poof it was gone. Everyone else has seemed to moved on from it why do I feel so sad.

thank you for who ever has listened. I am sorry for ranting but it felt good to let it out.

Is there anyone out there who has had a molar pregnancy?

Message edited 10/3/2011 12:04:41 AM.

Re: I am new here

Hi there....

I don't have any experience w/ a molar pregnancy but just wanted to tell you how sorry I am to hear what happened to you. I am angry for you. I don't understand why nothing was explained to you. It's ridiculous.

Everything you are feeling is completely understandable. I hope you are able to heal and somehow get past this.

Re: I am new here

My friend Annie went through this. She doesn't usually come on here but I will give her a heads up about this post. She now has an absolutely gorgeous and perfect 3 year old girl

And please don't feel that you are wrong for being sad - you are mourning the loss of your dreams and the baby you thought existed and there is NOTHING wrong with that

Re: I am new here

Annie isn't on LIF anymore but she gave me permission to post this:


"I found a chat forum dedicated completely to molar and partial molar pregnancies on BabyCenter.com and it helped me through. Also, with a partial molar there is a baby and no matter WHAT she has been through a devastating loss. I had a PMP and I found comfort in the fact that I could have gone full term and delivered a severely handicapped child who would not have survived 24 hours so I was thankful for how it happened at 12 weeks. You can tell her that it led me to switching OBGYNs because of the lack of care I received at the first office and that my new dr only made me wait 6 months. Getting bloods done every week was grueling but every negative blood draw was a step in the right direction and try to focus on the future instead of the past. I know how hard it is and how nothing makes sense but you get through it somehow."

Re: I am new here

i am so sorry... i dont have any experience with a molar pregnancy... but i had an ectopic and i also felt that it was weird to grieve because its not like the baby would have survived... but like LB said, its the thought of it... from the moment you see a BFP you automatically start loving!!

Re: I am new here

I'm so sorry for your loss

I had a m/c at 7 weeks 3 years ago, and to this day it still hurts. It does get easier with time though.

What gets me by each day is the fact that I was born to be a mother, and someday I will.

All of us will

Re: I am new here

I just wanted to say how sorry I am.

Re: I am new here

thank you ladies so much. I felt much better letting it out.

LB: thank you, please tell your friend Annie I said thanks as well. Her post really helped. Although now I am wondering why I am only having monthly blood draws? I think I need to make a list of questions for the doctor. The baby center board seems really great and I think I will join there.

Hopefully we will be back on the horse soon, seems like forever though.

and good luck to you all.

Re: I am new here

i also don't have experience with a molar pregnancy but i wanted to say how sorry i am for what you've gone through.

i had an ectopic pregnancy last summer and because 2 doctors didn't listen to me and didn't catch it in time, i lost my right tube. i was VERY angry at the time but it also taught me a huge lesson about the care i expect to receive. i "felt bad" questioning the doctors at the time and voicing my concerns. it led me to switch OB's and always question my care if i felt there was a need to!

even though you are in the midst of this and i'm sure it's all so overwhelming, you can switch doctors at any time and should if you don't feel comfortable with the care you are getting!

i think it's horrible that the doctor told you it was just "abnormal cells"....to YOU, you were pregnant and loved your baby. you have every right to grieve as much as you need to.

sorry to write a book! please FM me if you ever want to talk. i hope you begin to heal soon and get the BFP you dream of

Re: I am new here

so sorry for your loss -- I don't know antyhing about Molar pregnancy but I had a loss in April at 8weeks.

Like the other posters said a loss is a loss and it still hurts no matter what.

I would def.switch Drs ASAP! You deserve to know what is going on and have it explained.

that you get some answers

Re: I am new here

I am so so so sorry for your loss. I had a partial molar in July 2005. It was such a devastating loss for me as I lost the baby at 14 weeks.

Before this, I never heard of a molar pregnancy either. I did have sonos at 6 weeks and then 8 and then 12. We saw a baby developing. I went back for another sono and there was no heartbeat. Tests were done on cells from my uterus to determine that it was a partial molar.

I had to go for weekly blood tests to make sure my HCG levels went down below 5. Initially I was told I couldn't try to get pg again until my levels were 5 and lower for at least 6 months but luckily after about 6 or so weeks, they did go down. Going for the blood tests may have been as difficult as finding out that I lost the baby as there were always pregnant women in the blood lab. I went on to get pg in april of 2006 and had my second son.

It was such a tough time and I still can feel the sadness that I experienced. If you need to talk, feel free to FM me.

Thinking of you!!!

Re: I am new here

I am so sorry for your loss

Re: I am new here

No experience with a molar pregnancy either but I just wanted to say I'm so sorry for your loss.

Re: I am new here

thank you all for your support. It is also nice to hear that those of you who had PMPs went on to have children. I have my first draw on Wednesday hopefully some good news will come of it.

Re: I am new here

I am so sorry for your loss.

Re: I am new here

Just want to give you a ton of And change your doctors!

Re: I am new here

Posted by AyBeeBee

thank you ladies so much. I felt much better letting it out.

LB: thank you, please tell your friend Annie I said thanks as well. Her post really helped. Although now I am wondering why I am only having monthly blood draws? I think I need to make a list of questions for the doctor. The baby center board seems really great and I think I will join there.

Hopefully we will be back on the horse soon, seems like forever though.

and good luck to you all.