Sibling invites

DD's bday is coming up and we are having it at a bounce place. We invited 32 children. 20 from class and 12 personal friends. We were hoping the end count would be under 25 but I am getting classmates that are calling and requesting that the siblings be brought as well. What happens in these situations? My dh is going to flip when he finds out we might have to pay for the addtl siblings. I dont want to say no. I kinda feel like they should offer to pay for them when asking.

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Maybe you can just tell them you are at the maximum amount of kids allowed at the paty place already, so you have to keep it to the list..hth

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If parents have to bring the siblings, they should be paying for the extra charge. Sorry, but at $15-20 extra a kid, you could easily tack on another $100-200 to a party and that's not fair to you guys.

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Posted by PrincessP

Posted by Karen

If parents have to bring the siblings, they should be paying for the extra charge. Sorry, but at $15-20 extra a kid, you could easily tack on another $100-200 to a party and that's not fair to you guys.

My feelings exactly!

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I agree with the PPs. It's a lot of money and not fair to you guys!

(At least the parents are asking! For DS' b-day party last year, two families brought an extra sibling and didn't even ask -- or offer to pay!)

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I think this question has been brought up before in the few short months since I've been back on the boards...

And I can't believe that there are parents out there who are SO RUDE!

We've been having parties for Emily for the past 4 birthdays now and we've never had parents ask to bring a sibling!

If they did bring a sibling they always offered to give me the money to pay for their participation in the party...and in one case I allowed it, the other cases I told them not to worry about it, but the bottom line was....they were not just assuming that they could bring their other kids to the party!

To me it is just so downright rude that they are asking and I would never ever do that!

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At DD's 3rd birthday we had one parent call the morning of and say that they had to bring a sibling and 2 who just showed with them. This past year we got 25 children in our package so it wasn't an issue even when one showed with a sibling.

Both parties we were told that there are always several parents at every party who just "show" with a sibling. So it must happen frequently. I know I have said no to parties b.c I didn't have anyone to watch DD#2 but the parent insisted I bring her anyway.

It is a tough call. You could say that unfortunately you are at the maximum but if anyone says no you will let them know. Otherwise, I personally think it is uncomfortable to ask the person for money I would hope if they ask to bring the sibling that they would at the least offer to pay for them. Although others on here I'm sure would disagree with me on this. I do know that some places will ask you when you sign up for the party that if anyone brings additional people (ie siblings) do you want them to quietly tell them that they must pay for them. I know I would feel strange about that but maybe that is an option for you?

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You say "I am sorry, but no, siblings are not invited as we have a budget to stick to and are paying per child."

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what happens in these situations is... "sorry, siblings are not invited" and if the parent then declines, so be it.

sorry, but that takes a HUGE set of BALLS to ask.

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I am having the same issue. I feel terrible saying" No siblings" but I just can not afford to add to the already long list of kids and my tiny budget. I know I am a sucker and feel bad so DH had me put his cell for the RSVP and he is dealing with the calls.

I would never think my other child is invited nor would I ever ask. What we do is one parent and invited child goes while the other stays with the other DC. If we can't work it out then we decline or try to find a sitter.

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I have had to bring my younger DS with me to DD's friends' bouncy parties. I simply have him sit with me with his Nintendo DS so he isn't participating, but I don't have to get a babysitter.

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I hate, hate, hate when people just assume they can bring their other children along and let them join the party. It drives me nuts. Unless the invite says "siblings welcome", you should not expect your other child to be invited, as well.
Just yesterday, I made my husband take my DD to a party by himself because I knew if I brought my 18 month old, he would want to get down and play, too, and it wouldn't be fair to him to have to sit there and it would be far too presumptuous to think we could just let him participate.
I would just answer with, "No, I'm sorry, there isn't any room for siblings this year," or if you want, "Yes, siblings are welcome. The cost for them will be $xxx."

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I would always have a snack in my bag for him, and sometimes he will be offered pizza and/or cake, but I only allow it if every child has a slice already, AND if it is a place where you aren't paying per slice- KWIM? Most places around here just get pies delivered from a pizzeria. It has honestly only happened like 2x, usually I do try to make arrangements. Sometimes, though, things happen and we have to come. Once the parent actually INSISTED he participate b/c she had paid for 25 kids and had WAY less than that show up, so he I did let him play in that situation.

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I think if parents have to come with siblings, can't get babysitters, etc., then THEY should pay the cost of covering that child that wasn't invited.
IMO it is sort of nervy to bring along a sibling that is not directly invited and expect the party-thrower to cover the cost of that child.

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I think it is incredibly rude, unless it is a small child who doesn't fall under headcount and can not be left without his/hers primary caregiver.

In your case, when it is just classmates so pretty much families you barely know, you need to be honest and tell them the truth: that you have reached your maximum headcount and unfortunately, it is impossible to bring a sibling and you are very sorry!

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Well, I guess I am incredibly rude to bring my son to sit with me, instead of not showing up b/c a babysitting situation didn't work out at the last minute.

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I have been on both sides of the fence. I have had the need to ask to bring a younger sibling - and I offered to pay. Had I not been able to bring my younger child - I would have not been able to go. I have also been asked to include a younger sibling. I have no problem with it.

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Message edited 10/31/2011 2:13:49 PM.

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I have asked 2 times if I could bring my other son, since they are the same age and this si the first year they have been seperate sin school so they don't get why their brother can't come. I have offered to pay for the other child both times but they didn't meet the maximum so they wouldn't take the money. I also get a gift that is double what I would normally spend to compensate for me bringing my other son.

I don't think it is rude to ask or to even bring another non participating child to come. I would rather someone ask about bringing someone additional then not come when my child would love to have all of their class mates there.

Both times I called I was very nervous and worried that I was being rude and I guess according to the majority here I am. Oh well, I would rather the possibility of being rude, then have my son upset becuase he feels left out when he knows the borthday child and doens't understand why he can't go since this year he is not in that class.