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Does anyone here have "older" stepchildren?

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ThePinkGoose
In Your Hands

Member since 8/08

4706 total posts

Name:
Nunya

Does anyone here have "older" stepchildren?

Just curious if anyone has hit the late-teen mark yet. We're currently trying to come to terms with the stepkids not being "KIDS" anymore!!

SS is 18 and SD is 16 (almost 17).

They are SO good and still make efforts to see us but the fact is, we're no fun to them anymore Chat Icon

We still keep our "every other weekend" schedule but pretty much skip every 2nd one - does that make sense? So we end up seeing them about 1 weekend a month now. It STINKS!

Anyone else dealing with this? Any advice? IS this normal to give them so much space? I feel like we're doing a good thing not making them give up so much weekend time because we don't want to be a burden. Chat Icon

......but I miss them.........

Posted 11/14/11 10:12 AM
 

Lucky2008
LIF Adult

Member since 5/08

1005 total posts

Name:
Chris

Re: Does anyone here have "older" stepchildren?

I have one SD almost 17. she had put distance in her visitations a long time ago, I am talking at age 12. DH never wanted to "force" her to come or make her feel pressured to come to us for the weekend, etc. espcially when she was getting invited to sleepovers or friends were making plans to go shopping, movies, etc. So what happens, sometimes weeks would go by, he tries to make it a point to see her as much as he can (she lives out of state) but most times she makes plans with him and cancels last minute. Yes, it stinks, but he feels he would rather let her do whatever she wants and when she wants to see him she contacts him and they make plans. As for coming out to stay in our home with us, she chooses not to do that either. I know as they get older it gets harder, just enjoy and appreciate the time that you are getting with them, it sounds like you get to see them more frequently than we do which is great Chat Icon

Posted 11/14/11 11:13 AM
 

lipglossjunky73
My Everything!

Member since 11/05

35670 total posts

Name:
<3

Re: Does anyone here have "older" stepchildren?

Mine are 15 and 21

They want nothing to do with me Chat Icon

Posted 3/27/12 10:38 PM
 

jana
LIF Adult

Member since 3/06

1134 total posts

Name:

Re: Does anyone here have "older" stepchildren?

Posted by lipglossjunky73

Mine are 15 and 21

They want nothing to do with me Chat Icon



I'm sorry to hear that Chat Icon
You've always amazed me... Opening your heart to the girls & giving them chance after chance.

Posted 4/2/12 11:44 PM
 

cgdg61606
Little Brother Christopher

Member since 2/07

6815 total posts

Name:
Christine

Re: Does anyone here have "older" stepchildren?

Mine are 12 and 15. Not quite older, but getting there. We see them a lot less often then when they were little, but on average see them every other weekend. Not twice a week for dinner like we used to... school, homework, sports, friends... etc.

Posted 4/12/12 2:50 PM
 

Googlybear
i got a mama's boy!!

Member since 10/11

1132 total posts

Name:

Re: Does anyone here have "older" stepchildren?

my ss is 13 and his mother gave up custdy 8 months ago. needed to go play teenager again. He would prefer to be with us on a regular espcially now that i am expecting.. He now is pulling away a bit to spend time with his friends, but for teh most part- he is still pretty much home..

Posted 4/21/12 8:29 AM
 

lipglossjunky73
My Everything!

Member since 11/05

35670 total posts

Name:
<3

Re: Does anyone here have "older" stepchildren?

I have 2 stepdaughters. They are 15 and 21. I rarely see the 21 year old lately and we are going through an extremely difficult time with the 15 yr old.

Posted 7/17/12 4:39 PM
 

chilltocam
LIF Adult

Member since 11/11

9141 total posts

Name:

Does anyone here have

I have 2 stepsons - 14 and 20. The 14 year old spends 1/2 his time with us (one week w/us and then one week with his BM). We have an amazingly close relationship - we do things together, just the 2 of us all the time (he loves to come to work with me in the summer, or go shopping, or pretty much anything). The 20 year old is not around too much. He's in college and lives on campus during the school year and comes and goes as he pleases.

Posted 7/18/12 5:13 PM
 

vinsgirl
LIF Infant

Member since 2/06

326 total posts

Name:
Joanne

Does anyone here have

I have 2 stepsons also- 24 and 26...The older they got the closer we became..it was hard in the begining they were 11 and 13, and were very distant with us..but they realize NOW I am there best friend.

Posted 8/10/12 10:54 AM
 

ThePinkGoose
In Your Hands

Member since 8/08

4706 total posts

Name:
Nunya

Does anyone here have

Joanne - that's awesome to hear! When my SK were younger, we spent so much time together. Now that they are in their teens they are super busy with friends and activities. I'm hoping that once they are in their 20's, they'll come back to us. :)

Posted 8/13/12 8:09 AM
 

2boys1girl4me
LIF Infant

Member since 5/12

321 total posts

Name:

Does anyone here have

My SS wants nothing to do with us simply because his mother has poisoned him against us for 8 years. Also now that hes 13 he is spending more time with his friends on our scheduled days with him anyway.

Posted 8/13/12 9:05 AM
 

MommyOf2princesses
LIF Infant

Member since 2/12

71 total posts

Name:

Does anyone here have

My SD is 18 and we very rarely see her! We are also dealing with tough times as far as college grades, boyfriends, getting a tattoo...it's hard because we often get upset at her choices but we hate to spend her few times with us nagging her and having sit-downs :(

Posted 1/10/13 10:41 PM
 

KimberlyScott
Graceyn=My World <3

Member since 10/08

4173 total posts

Name:
Kimberly

Does anyone here have

My SS is 21. When I started dating his Dad he was 15 and we got along well. Then his Mom sabatoged our relationship and its pretty much non-existant now. I think he feels guilty having one with me. His Mom is a dead-beat, DH had custody of him. Truth is tho, he is following in his mothers footsteps and I'm ok with the relationship the way it is. He has lied and took advantage of me too many times.

Posted 1/23/13 12:23 PM
 
 

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