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Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
I was curious if any of you had hired a night nurse for help in the PM or a Doula for assistance during the day after your multiples were born. It seems like all the professionals we meet with (lamaze teacher, twins info session leader etc) are like "OMG GET A NIGHT NURSE IT WILL SAVE YOUR LIFE" but my husband and I have no clue if this is really accurate or not.
Did you have outside help come in during the beginning? If so, for how many hours/days/weeks etc?
If you were able to rely on family, did they sleep over? Just help out around the house?
I have no clue what this will look like and am most clearly freaking out now lol.
Thanks ladies!
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Posted 3/21/12 6:12 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
PregowithTwins
My boys turned 8
Member since 5/11 2451 total posts
Name:
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Re: Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
Posted by statusquoscreenname
I was curious if any of you had hired a night nurse for help in the PM or a Doula for assistance during the day after your multiples were born. It seems like all the professionals we meet with (lamaze teacher, twins info session leader etc) are like "OMG GET A NIGHT NURSE IT WILL SAVE YOUR LIFE" but my husband and I have no clue if this is really accurate or not.
Did you have outside help come in during the beginning? If so, for how many hours/days/weeks etc?
If you were able to rely on family, did they sleep over? Just help out around the house?
I have no clue what this will look like and am most clearly freaking out now lol.
Thanks ladies!
I personally didnt have a nurse. I had my mom come from out of state & stay with me for 3 weeks. She was a life saver. My husband was also AWESOME at getting up at night. You will be more tired then you can imagine & have to be prepared for both of you to get up. If your husband can't because of work, you need to have someone there to help you. You will be so tired & in pain from c section if that is how you deliver. Good LUck girl!! You can do it
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| Posted 3/21/12 9:40 PM |
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Re: Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
My DH will be home for a few weeks and is pretty psyched about being hands on, so I was hoping between the two of us, plus some intermittent help (MIL staying for a week or so) we would be able to get by!
Thanks for sharing!
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| Posted 3/21/12 9:56 PM |
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allIwant
Love my crazy life!
Member since 1/10 9170 total posts
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Re: Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
I didn't get a nurse. IMO I couldn't imagine having a stranger be in my house helping me. It can totally be done on your own. We closed on our new house the day my twins came home from the hospital. Spent a week at my moms while DH did some stuff at our new house. Once we were in our new house a week later we were on our own and unpacking. Things were crazy but we managed.
I would take people up on any offers to cook food for you. That was the BEST! My grandma made us dinners we could just throw in the oven and it was a huge help.
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| Posted 3/21/12 10:11 PM |
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Champ
2 little ladies
Member since 1/11 2918 total posts
Name:
Rose
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Re: Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
I dont think I could have had someone stay in my house when the babies first came home from the nicu, but then again I didnt have them home when I was really hurting.
Did we need help? YES!!!! Both of us were zombies. My mom would come and stay on the weekends and get up at night for feedings to let my DW sleep (I had to get up to pump). Having people come and clean, cook and do laundry will be the most help IMO.
I wish I had lined that up ahead of time. I also wish I had prepared more food in the freezer before bed rest got the better of me.
Good Luck!!!!!
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| Posted 3/22/12 6:02 AM |
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Re: Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
Phew! Thank you for helping me convince myself and my DH that it IS possible. Sometimes when you have so many "professionals" telling you something you begin to doubt your own abilities.
Still nervous as all get out, but with some help I think we'll handle it :)
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| Posted 3/22/12 8:43 AM |
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snowprincess
My happy babies
Member since 3/06 3428 total posts
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Re: Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
we did not get a night nurse and i already had an almost 2 year old
we have a nanny that came during the day and helped with my son or the twins (but my mom came during the day when the nanny had the week off - my first week hime with my twins) - i would sleep when the twins were sleeping at least an hour or two a day and it really helped me not be in a cloud - and get a shower every day - oh my dh went back to work right away - but he did help me for a while at night
without help - just make sure you get some sleep during the day - usually you can get sleep when they both sleep - also early on was not so bad - but make sure you have some help maybe around 6 weeks when they wake up more because then the cummulative sleep exhaustion can catch up to you
also you figure out ways to make thigs easier. after a while i found it easier to nurse both babies at the same time easier then giving one a bottle and nursign the other (my dh usually gave the bottle)
also we learned it was easier to have the powdered formula in the bottle and an extra container with pre-measured water the easiest way to make a bottle when you are half asleep - we tried a formula dispenser and it would alaways have too much formula left in the morning
you get creative and it is tiring but you get good figurig out ways to do everything - def use any help you can get - i had my mom help with laundry and food at times
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| Posted 3/22/12 12:07 PM |
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Nayia
<3 <3 <3
Member since 10/07 1824 total posts
Name:
Penny
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Re: Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
I had no help at all. after coming home from the hospital my hubby was home on the weekend and then come Monday it was me and my girls. I was left alone to just figure things out.
However I was VERY lucky and for the most part my girls slept 4 hour intervals at night...
So I had some sleep and was able to function.
DH never woke up at night since he worked and needed rest. He tried to afew times but I never let him.
If you can afford the help then get it!!!! even if its just to help u out for a few weeks. The 1st few weeks of the girls being home is a blur to me because i was always SO busy!!! maybe if you have the help u will be able to enjoy the babies more.
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| Posted 3/22/12 9:28 PM |
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sunflowerjesss
Mommy to 3!
Member since 10/05 20369 total posts
Name:
Jesss, duh.
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Re: Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
We didn't hire anyone. DH was off for two weeks from the day I delivered.
My parents do live with us and were a major help once DH went back to work. But all day it was just me, my (then) 2.5 year old, and the girls.
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| Posted 3/24/12 9:12 AM |
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Metsmomma
Happy Winter!
Member since 1/09 5351 total posts
Name:
Renee
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Re: Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
What's help??? No we were on our own and I mean no in laws no grandmas, just me and DH and I had two my two older DS's. And DH worked at night so at night I was by myself and we did it just fine. You'd be surprised what you can do by yourself when you have too. You'll be fine!!!! 
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| Posted 3/24/12 9:35 AM |
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cowgirlkate
Twins times TWO!
Member since 1/11 1197 total posts
Name:
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Re: Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
I had my mom a few nights a week for the first 3-3.5 months and also two friends that were willing to stay till after the 3 am feeding. They would keep the girls for a few hours so I could sleep and then they would help me feed them. The first few months are rough, but all I can suggest is get them on the same schedule and stick to it and don't let them stray!!! Always feed both at the same time!!! We fed every 3 hrs for 2 months then every 4 hrs for about 1 month. After that they were sleeping more and now at almost 5 months I can be more flexible with the schedule because I can feed them on my own without help. I also pumped for the first 4 months. Now with no pumping and the girls eating real food, things are great!
ETA: I would suggest lining up a few diff kinds of help. A few friends that could do evenings, a few that could do afternoons, and a few that could do late night/overnight. I found that the staggered help was most useful so that I could have help at diff times of their schedule.
Message edited 3/27/2012 12:19:24 PM.
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| Posted 3/27/12 12:17 PM |
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Re: Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
Me: "So like a bunch of girls on LIF, who actually had like two babies at a time, said its totally manageable..."
DH: "Oh"
Me: "I think that means you can stop worrying so much"
DH: "Thank god, ok"
LOL So yea, we're on board and much more calm about being able to handle these two with some backup now and again.
Thanks for the support :)
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| Posted 3/27/12 5:34 PM |
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Kelly04
LIF Adolescent
Member since 8/05 841 total posts
Name:
Kelly
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Re: Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
We didn't have any help. DH was off for two weeks and is very hands on. I'm not going to lie.....it's tough. But the hardest thing for us was the twins were up all night and slept all day the first few weeks. We also have another child who was 2 when the twins were born. Trying to entertain her all day was rough. If the twins are your first you will be fine because you can rest during the day.
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| Posted 3/27/12 10:12 PM |
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PreshusSmurf
So in love with my little guys
Member since 1/07 2963 total posts
Name:
Jess
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Re: Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
We didn't have help. We had offers for help but honestly I really truly felt like I handled it better on my own than if I had someone come over.
Its very hard to explain.
Logically you'd think its easier to have another set of hands.
But in MY reality, I just felt like I would figure it out if I gave myself the chance.
I also felt like having help for a week or two was "silly" because what would I do when the help was over? I'd have to figure it all out then anyway, so I might as well start now.
DH & I did the overnights as shifts so that we could each get some uninterrupted sleep. The one who was "on" slept on the couch if the boys gave them the opportunity, the one who was "off" slept in bed until it was their turn.
They had a 3 week NICU stay after arriving just before 32 weeks. The bright spot of the NICU stay (if there is one) is that the nurses will help teach you how to feed them, change them, sponge bath them. We came home pretty comfortable with the basic care stuff that someone with a full-term baby might have needed a night nurse to teach them. The other bright spot is they came home on a schedule of eating every 3 hours, so all we had to do was keep them on that schedule. I hope that you don't have a NICU stay for your babies but if you do - there are a couple of "bright spots"
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| Posted 3/27/12 11:06 PM |
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cowgirlkate
Twins times TWO!
Member since 1/11 1197 total posts
Name:
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Re: Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
Posted by PreshusSmurf
We didn't have help. We had offers for help but honestly I really truly felt like I handled it better on my own than if I had someone come over.
Its very hard to explain.
Logically you'd think its easier to have another set of hands.
But in MY reality, I just felt like I would figure it out if I gave myself the chance.
I also felt like having help for a week or two was "silly" because what would I do when the help was over? I'd have to figure it all out then anyway, so I might as well start now.
DH & I did the overnights as shifts so that we could each get some uninterrupted sleep. The one who was "on" slept on the couch if the boys gave them the opportunity, the one who was "off" slept in bed until it was their turn.
They had a 3 week NICU stay after arriving just before 32 weeks. The bright spot of the NICU stay (if there is one) is that the nurses will help teach you how to feed them, change them, sponge bath them. We came home pretty comfortable with the basic care stuff that someone with a full-term baby might have needed a night nurse to teach them. The other bright spot is they came home on a schedule of eating every 3 hours, so all we had to do was keep them on that schedule. I hope that you don't have a NICU stay for your babies but if you do - there are a couple of "bright spots"
ITA with the NICU stuff! Those nurses were AMAZING and the only reason I was able to get the breastfeeding thing going and keep the girls on a 3 hr schedule...Its unfortunate to have to have your babies there, but they do such a great job taking care of them and sharing knowledge with mommies and daddies!
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| Posted 3/29/12 9:10 PM |
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allIwant
Love my crazy life!
Member since 1/10 9170 total posts
Name:
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Re: Family/Doula/Night Nurse for extra help?
Posted by cowgirlkate
Posted by PreshusSmurf
We didn't have help. We had offers for help but honestly I really truly felt like I handled it better on my own than if I had someone come over.
Its very hard to explain.
Logically you'd think its easier to have another set of hands.
But in MY reality, I just felt like I would figure it out if I gave myself the chance.
I also felt like having help for a week or two was "silly" because what would I do when the help was over? I'd have to figure it all out then anyway, so I might as well start now.
DH & I did the overnights as shifts so that we could each get some uninterrupted sleep. The one who was "on" slept on the couch if the boys gave them the opportunity, the one who was "off" slept in bed until it was their turn.
They had a 3 week NICU stay after arriving just before 32 weeks. The bright spot of the NICU stay (if there is one) is that the nurses will help teach you how to feed them, change them, sponge bath them. We came home pretty comfortable with the basic care stuff that someone with a full-term baby might have needed a night nurse to teach them. The other bright spot is they came home on a schedule of eating every 3 hours, so all we had to do was keep them on that schedule. I hope that you don't have a NICU stay for your babies but if you do - there are a couple of "bright spots"
ITA with the NICU stuff! Those nurses were AMAZING and the only reason I was able to get the breastfeeding thing going and keep the girls on a 3 hr schedule...Its unfortunate to have to have your babies there, but they do such a great job taking care of them and sharing knowledge with mommies and daddies!
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| Posted 3/30/12 9:28 PM |
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