New to boards and Need your advice

Hi everyone. My name is Jen. I am looking for some support and guidance from some very experienced women (all of you ).

My journey started 6 years ago this month when I found out I was pregnant. I was overjoyed especially because it happened on our first try without any medical intervention. Our excitement turned to tragedy in a very short 20 weeks when in a matter of hours I became gravely ill and was told I had HELLP Syndrome and had no choice but to terminate my pregnancy. After nearly dying and spending 4 days in the hospital we said goodbye to our DD and buried her Pinelawn Cemetery.

After taking some time to recover both physically and emotionally we found out I was pregnant again (conceived naturally) and although It was an extremely stressful pregnancy due to my previous pregnancy and loss, I remained healthy and gave birth to a beautiful baby boy via emergency c section bc I was not dilating and baby was in distress. Once again, after a few short hours of pure bliss, I quickly became seriously ill and ended up in ICU needed emergency surgery only to discover that my intestines were cut during my c section and I was now severely septic. After 38 days in the hospital, 2 incisional hernia repair surgeries (over the course of a year) I now have an amazing 4.5 yo son who was worth everything we went through and more.

Bear with me...here comes the infertility. We started TTC almost 2.5 years ago. After 1 year of TTC naturally we sought the help of LI IVF Dr Kennigsburg (referred by new OBGYN). After explaining my history and a barrage of testing....nothing major seems to be wrong w me or my DH. Possible PCOS but nothing serious. HSG was normal. No scar tissue from past surgeries or issues with previous pregnancies.

So we decided to do IUI w the help of letrozole. After 4 failed attempts (visible follicles each time) we decided to take a break bc we honestly couldn't afford it anymore and dr Kennigsburg was pushing IVF which insurance won't cover and we can't afford.

So here I am. Everyone keeps telling me to be patient bc it will happen "when it's meant to be" but I am 35 now. How much longer do I wait? Do I look for another doctor? Do we do another round of IUI? Do I take out a personal loan to do IVF? With my previous history of pregnancy and deliveries should I just be thankful for the DS I have and move on with my life w my DH?

Please help me all guidance is appreciated. TIA

Re: New to boards and Need your advice

Just wanted to say . You've been through a lot and my prayers are with you for another little bundle.

New to boards and Need your advice

Honestly, only you can decide if it is worth it for your family. You are the one whose health may suffer and whose finances must survive. Although I did not have any of the health issues you had, i'm in a sorta similar boat in that my DH's insurance that did cover IVF is being lost in 2 days, i'm closing in on 35 very fast, and have an amazing 4 year old DS and have been trying for 3 years for another.

Whatever the decision is, it's something you and DH have to be comfortable with. Will you always wonder what would have happened if you did one round of IVF and be kicking yourself? If you took out a loan, would your daughter's quality of life suffer at all?

Good luck in making this tough decision! :(

New to boards and Need your advice

I wanted to send you hugs too! If you are like me, you will want to try the IVF because you'll want to know you did everything in your power to try for another little one. I suggest you see Dr. Kofinas. He is MFM but with your background... he may be just the one to tell you or add something more to the plan.

New to boards and Need your advice

Thank you ladies. I appreciate your kind words and advice. I was reading up on dr kofinas. Is he is Brooklyn??

New to boards and Need your advice

i believe he has an office in Brooklyn. I used his office in Garden City. His brother, I believe, is an RE IN Brooklyn.