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chilltocam
LIF Adult
Member since 11/11 9141 total posts
Name:
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If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
Do you make them pay for any part of it (outfit, ticket, after prom activities?). Last night I told DH that I think my SS should pay for at least part of the prom expenses (he has a part time job), but now I'm feeling kind of bad about it. The whole thing will cost about $350-$400, so it's not really a crazy amount (I know it can be a lot more, esp for girls and the cost of just the dress alone can be more than that). Just wondering what others do.
Thanks
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Posted 5/20/16 11:00 AM  |
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CL2012
LIF Toddler
Member since 1/13 374 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
When I was a senior, my mom bought my dress and I think paid for my hair to get done but I paid for everything else: my ticket, my share of the limo and for the activities we did after prom out east. That probably wasn't the norm among my peer group, but my parents gave me an allowance and I had a part time job so I was expected to save and budget for my own fun activities.
I'm still far away from dealing with this but I think as a parent myself, I would be inclined to pay for the prom clothing and ticket but after prom activities would be the kid's responsibility.
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| Posted 5/20/16 11:07 AM |
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chilltocam
LIF Adult
Member since 11/11 9141 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
Posted by CL2012
I'm still far away from dealing with this but I think as a parent myself, I would be inclined to pay for the prom clothing and ticket but after prom activities would be the kid's responsibility.
That was exactly what I said we should do - we'll pay for the ticket and tux and he can pay for the after prom activity. When I brought it up to DH he said he thought we should pay for everything, but was willing to go along with what I said. So,now I'm just feeling like a scrooge 
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| Posted 5/20/16 11:19 AM |
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Chai77
Brighter days ahead
Member since 4/07 7364 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
I think it's fair to say you will pay for the bulk of it like the tux and ticket, but extras are his choice and his financial responsibility. Like after prom activities. Does he normally pay for his own activities, like going to the movies etc?
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| Posted 5/20/16 11:44 AM |
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chilltocam
LIF Adult
Member since 11/11 9141 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
Posted by Chai77
I think it's fair to say you will pay for the bulk of it like the tux and ticket, but extras are his choice and his financial responsibility. Like after prom activities. Does he normally pay for his own activities, like going to the movies etc?
He pays for most of his own activities when he goes out with friends. But "special events" we always pay for (like gifts for sweet 16's or Bar mitzvahs, or if he needs a new outfit, we pay). And sometimes we'll give him extra $$ "just because" - like a $20 here or there
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| Posted 5/20/16 12:06 PM |
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blessedmama
LIF Infant
Member since 2/16 341 total posts
Name:
Heather`
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
Going through this right now AND with a girl so MUCH more expensive:
She has a job so will have to pay for some of it.
Dress ($500)-grandmother wanted to buy
Alterations (not sure exact amount yet but the salon gave us a number of $250)-again grandmother wants to pay for
Shoes-($30)-grandmother also
Accessories-not sure of price yet. Not sure who is paying
Hair-$65-not sure yet
Makeup-$50-not sure yet
Ticket-$100-we are paying
Limo-$140-she will be paying
Afterwards-they have no clue yet.
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| Posted 5/20/16 12:35 PM |
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BargainMama
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 15657 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
My son doesn't have a job, he went to the Jr. Prom this year, and is attending his friend's senior prom this year. Even if he did have a job, I wouldn't have made him pay for anything. Those expenses all fall under the cost of having kids in high school IMO.
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| Posted 5/20/16 1:52 PM |
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blessedmama
LIF Infant
Member since 2/16 341 total posts
Name:
Heather`
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
Posted by BargainMama
My son doesn't have a job, he went to the Jr. Prom this year, and is attending his friend's senior prom this year. Even if he did have a job, I wouldn't have made him pay for anything. Those expenses all fall under the cost of having kids in high school IMO.
Senior year is so expensive. I appreciate the extra help.
We just recently paid for the Sr. trip which cost $500. Then there was pictures, graduation expenses, college visits and expenses, dinners, yearbook, sports expenses, etc, etc.
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| Posted 5/20/16 4:08 PM |
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KarenK122
The Journey is the Destination
Member since 5/05 4431 total posts
Name:
Karen
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If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
In my head I think it is a great idea to have your child help pay for the prom as much as they are able too as it teaches responsibility but I know that I will end up paying for the entire thing and most likely be going overboard.
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| Posted 5/20/16 7:51 PM |
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BargainMama
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 15657 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
Posted by blessedmama
Posted by BargainMama
My son doesn't have a job, he went to the Jr. Prom this year, and is attending his friend's senior prom this year. Even if he did have a job, I wouldn't have made him pay for anything. Those expenses all fall under the cost of having kids in high school IMO.
Senior year is so expensive. I appreciate the extra help.
We just recently paid for the Sr. trip which cost $500. Then there was pictures, graduation expenses, college visits and expenses, dinners, yearbook, sports expenses, etc, etc.
Yup, it sure is. We just had senior pics taken last week, and I hear they run about $400 through the school (joke since they aren't very nice!)
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| Posted 5/20/16 9:47 PM |
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blessedmama
LIF Infant
Member since 2/16 341 total posts
Name:
Heather`
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
Posted by BargainMama
Posted by blessedmama
Posted by BargainMama
My son doesn't have a job, he went to the Jr. Prom this year, and is attending his friend's senior prom this year. Even if he did have a job, I wouldn't have made him pay for anything. Those expenses all fall under the cost of having kids in high school IMO.
Senior year is so expensive. I appreciate the extra help.
We just recently paid for the Sr. trip which cost $500. Then there was pictures, graduation expenses, college visits and expenses, dinners, yearbook, sports expenses, etc, etc.
Yup, it sure is. We just had senior pics taken last week, and I hear they run about $400 through the school (joke since they aren't very nice!)
I think ours was about $250 and they were from a local photographer that the school uses. They came out beautiful though so I was happy.
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| Posted 5/20/16 10:36 PM |
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chilltocam
LIF Adult
Member since 11/11 9141 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
Posted by KarenK122
In my head I think it is a great idea to have your child help pay for the prom as much as they are able too as it teaches responsibility but I know that I will end up paying for the entire thing and most likely be going overboard.
That was the main reason I think he should pay for some of it. He will be going away to school in a few months and has never had to budget or save for anything. So it's really about learning a "life lesson" more than anything else
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| Posted 5/21/16 7:41 AM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
My parents paid for everything when it came to my prom, even though I had a P/T job. I'll do the same for my kids when the time comes. They will have plenty of time to pay their own way in life, for these special events when they are young it will be on us. 
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| Posted 5/21/16 8:45 PM |
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blessedmama
LIF Infant
Member since 2/16 341 total posts
Name:
Heather`
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
Posted by Hofstra26
My parents paid for everything when it came to my prom, even though I had a P/T job. I'll do the same for my kids when the time comes. They will have plenty of time to pay their own way in life, for these special events when they are young it will be on us.
My advice would be to start saving early as it gets so more expensive as kids get older. I heard people say it but never imagined how crazy it can be. When I went to prom I wasn't working so I didn't pay for any of it but it didn't cost anywhere near what it costs now, nor the amount of things the kids do now in senior year that adds up.
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| Posted 5/22/16 8:17 AM |
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jana
LIF Adult
Member since 3/06 1134 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
We went through this last year. I'm all for teaching a life lesson on how to manage money, for ex. If he wanted new rims for his car, he can work & pay for them..that's a luxury. But not Prom, thats more like a rite of passage. We paid for everything associated with Prom, after prom & even hosted pre prom. It was our pleasure.
& like you, my DH is his step dad & never questioned a single expense. But you are the parent & every family dynamic is different. You do as much as you are comfortable doing. Can his mom chip in to lessen the load?
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| Posted 6/9/16 10:54 PM |
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chilltocam
LIF Adult
Member since 11/11 9141 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
Posted by jana
We went through this last year. I'm all for teaching a life lesson on how to manage money, for ex. If he wanted new rims for his car, he can work & pay for them..that's a luxury. But not Prom, thats more like a rite of passage. We paid for everything associated with Prom, after prom & even hosted pre prom. It was our pleasure.
& like you, my DH is his step dad & never questioned a single expense. But you are the parent & every family dynamic is different. You do as much as you are comfortable doing. Can his mom chip in to lessen the load?
Unfortunately his mother would not chip in (and I don't mean unfortunately because of the expense, I mean it because her attitude about paying for anything for her son is pretty much, "no." But that's a whole other story  ). We wound up paying for everything and I'm fine with it and very excited for him. Thanks!
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| Posted 6/10/16 2:46 PM |
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Millie3
LIF Adult
Member since 7/13 1280 total posts
Name:
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
Posted by Hofstra26
My parents paid for everything when it came to my prom, even though I had a P/T job. I'll do the same for my kids when the time comes. They will have plenty of time to pay their own way in life, for these special events when they are young it will be on us.
Absolutely agree.
Message edited 6/13/2016 9:45:57 PM.
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| Posted 6/13/16 9:34 PM |
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Peainapod
Peanuts are here!
Member since 1/09 13591 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: If you have (or had) a kid going to prom
i paid for all of it myself. my parents were too broke.
i had babysitting $$ from regular babysitting jobs; i was camp counselor and then was working part time senior yr of HS (b/c I graduated 6 months early).
they werent paying.
if it were me now and my kid was working, I would foot some to most of the bill. not all. But who knows. My kid just graduated kindergarten. i have a ways to go..lol.
Message edited 6/17/2016 1:53:51 PM.
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| Posted 6/17/16 1:52 PM |
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