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Holding a child back in school?

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DWKS810
LIF Adolescent

Member since 3/09

554 total posts

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Holding a child back in school?

I am thinking ahead here but since decisions regarding starting her in preschool need to be made in the next year, I would appreciate some insight anyway!

I have a daughter who was born extremely premature (14 weeks early) and her birthday falls 1 week before the cut-off for kindergarten for our district. She has some mild gross motor delays (she's mostly overcome) and is speech delayed (receptive language is perfect, way delayed with regard to expressive language). We anticipate that she will be getting speech therapy through EI starting in about a month.

If things stay as they are and we wanted to keep her back a year in school, and start her in kindergarten a year late, I've been told the district will let you do this. But I also heard it can preclude them from getting services - not sure how it would impact getting an IEP. But I don't want to do something to help her and then limit her ability to get other services if she needs them, since she may have needs in the future I can't yet plan for. She's very intelligent and is doing great overall but could have learning disabilities down the road. Anyone know how this would work, or have experience holding their child back?

Message edited 10/8/2017 8:38:27 PM.

Posted 10/8/17 8:37 PM
 

jamnmore
LIF Adult

Member since 6/16

989 total posts

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Holding a child back in school?

What is the reason for wanting to delay the start of school?

Posted 10/9/17 1:27 PM
 

JDandMe
LIF Adult

Member since 9/10

996 total posts

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Holding a child back in school?

My experience is different b/c my son was diagnosed with ASD. His birthday is in October and I wanted to hold him back and have him do another year in a center based pre-school. I was told that since there was a program and services that can accommodate his needs, the district would not pay for another year of preschool and while it was my decision whether or not to hold him back, if he didn't go to kindergarten the services would be out of pocket since the school was offering a program that fit his needs.

Maybe I'm not reading your post correctly but I don't understand the reasoning behind wanted to hold your child back. If you hold her back she will basically be repeating pre-school curriculum which, based on what you wrote, she seems able to complete.

Posted 10/9/17 1:57 PM
 

MrsT809
LIF Adult

Member since 9/09

12167 total posts

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Holding a child back in school?

How old is she?

I definitely get where you're coming from. I've heard mixed info regarding services but what the pp explained makes sense. I do know that if you have a upk program they cannot be held back for that. Dd was a preemie and while she seems fine she is at risk for learning disabilities so I totally get the concern about the unknown. She was also bumped up a school year bc of being early and has a birthday right before the cutoff. She turns 3 next month and started a 3yo program this year. She seems okay but the owner said she's having some trouble adjusting which has taken my confidence down a notch. I plan to send her to upk next year and see how she does. If she's truly not ready but doesn't qualify for any services then I will seriously consider holding her back. Our upk is in our home elementary school so it would really stink to have to pull her out after a year.

Posted 10/9/17 2:33 PM
 

Straightarrow
LIF Adult

Member since 2/11

3534 total posts

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Re: Holding a child back in school?

I would not hold back, I think she can probably get more services in a school based setting if she needs them

Posted 10/9/17 4:47 PM
 

lightblue
LIF Adult

Member since 1/17

2249 total posts

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Re: Holding a child back in school?

I still think it's early to make a decision about holding her back. What I would do is continue with EI and then go through the CPSE transition process. You could see if CPSE recommends her for a pre-school program and see how she does there. You never know how much she will progress during those two years in CPSE. When she's 4 you can re-evaluate whether or not you think she'd be better off holding off K for another year if you think she's not ready.

Posted 10/10/17 1:18 PM
 

luckysmom
Yes it is! Going as planned:)

Member since 6/07

5339 total posts

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Holding a child back in school?

You can only go through EI until the child is 3 and then you transition to CPSE. So I would start with EI and then do the transition to CPSE and take it from there. I have a friend who has a son born in November. He has SPD and when it was time for him to start kindergarten she held him back a year. He just was not ready for many reasons. He was already receiving services through CPSE and because she held him back the district tried to take away his services saying he had to start K when he is supposed to. That is not true and they can't do that. She fought them and she won. They had to continue giving her son services and I am pretty sure he had an IEP going into K. I don't think he does now but in K I believe he did. She did have to take her son to the elementary school he would be going to I believe for these services, but they could not deny the child services. I would start her in pre school and when it comes time to register for K then make your decision about holding her back. Good luck!

Posted 10/12/17 11:33 AM
 

DWKS810
LIF Adolescent

Member since 3/09

554 total posts

Name:

Re: Holding a child back in school?

Thanks everyone...

I'm just thinking (way) ahead. At the rate we're going, depending on how this year goes, I would not feel ready to put her in preschool next year, and I wanted her to get the full two years of preschool + pre-K before starting kindergarten. So my thought was, maybe I would wait and then put her in preschool a year late, and just continue on that schedule and start Kindergarten when she's 5, turning 6 in late November.

I know there's a lot I don't know yet about if she'll be ready and when, but she's so close to the cut-off as it is, and I just really feel like developmentally she's always been a few months behind (and more in line with when she was supposed to have been born, which makes sense) and I don't want to push her into the grade level she should be based on birth date when I feel like she might not belong there. At the same time, I was afraid that doing that might disqualify her from services while in school as she gets older and just wasn't sure how that would all work. Who knows... maybe she will grow leaps and bounds over the next 2 years and be more "ready" than I think she will be and it won't be an issue, but I was just curious about the logistics if I were to try to hold her back.

Posted 10/17/17 10:45 AM
 

Dolphinsbaby
My 3 little guys!

Member since 12/10

2943 total posts

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Re: Holding a child back in school?

I understand why you want to do that. I believe for services it goes with their school year and yes if there is a lag she wouldn’t be covered. For example, if she is getting services in CPSE, she would age out at 5 for kindergarten and services would continue in kindergarten (assuming she still needs) under CSE. There are different budgets and different people that run these (it always comes down to $). So while you may choose to hold her back a year and she may stay pre-k, I’m pretty sure CPSE would not cover another year of services and CSE wouldn’t be able to as she is not in a “school age setting”. I might be wrong so definitely look into it, but that’s how I understood it.

Posted 10/17/17 9:22 PM
 

luckysmom
Yes it is! Going as planned:)

Member since 6/07

5339 total posts

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Re: Holding a child back in school?

Posted by Dolphinsbaby

I understand why you want to do that. I believe for services it goes with their school year and yes if there is a lag she wouldn’t be covered. For example, if she is getting services in CPSE, she would age out at 5 for kindergarten and services would continue in kindergarten (assuming she still needs) under CSE. There are different budgets and different people that run these (it always comes down to $). So while you may choose to hold her back a year and she may stay pre-k, I’m pretty sure CPSE would not cover another year of services and CSE wouldn’t be able to as she is not in a “school age setting”. I might be wrong so definitely look into it, but that’s how I understood it.



This is pretty much what they tried to tell my friend. But they cant deny a child services and when she went back at them they ultimately had to give her son the services. The only stipulation is she had to bring him to the elementary school for these services. I don't remember if it was CPSE she kept the services through or if they transitioned to CSE but she got the servixes for her son and they carried with him the folowing school year in kindergarten. We have a mutual friend who was in the same situation. She held her son back and they wouldnt give him services because she held him back. Same district. Unfortunately she did not know to fight back and her son didn't get services that could have helped him. But the schools will definitely try as hard as they can to not have to provide those services Chat Icon

Posted 10/19/17 9:37 AM
 

pnbplus1
Family

Member since 5/09

5751 total posts

Name:
Mommy

Re: Holding a child back in school?

I can't speak to services, etc but I will say that you should trust your gut. Given that she was so early and that her bday is so close to the cutoff I would definitely consider holding her back and giving her additional time to catch up. Professionally, I've tested several children who were preemies and started school based on their bday vs expected due date and they did have some academic/learning difficulties as they got older and school became more difficult. That's not to say that it will defintely happen, just that it can. Social developement is also something important to consider. Just do what you think is best for your child based on what you see and know. There will always be those who say kids shouldn't be held bc of their bdays but they aren't the ones that have to deal with the repercussions.

Posted 10/21/17 10:30 PM
 

lightblue
LIF Adult

Member since 1/17

2249 total posts

Name:

Re: Holding a child back in school?

I think you'd have to transition her to CPSE (preschool) once she turns 3... and then when she's at the age where she's ready to go to K you can make the decision to hold her back from starting K but, you could lose services, but that would be a conversation with your district's Special Education director when the time comes.

Posted 10/23/17 12:22 PM
 
 

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