Why don't grown-ups believe in Santa? What do you tell your kids?

So my 4.5-year-old was reading the Polar Express with me the other night, and asked why some people including grown-ups don't believe in Santa. She understood that's why they don't hear the bell. How do you explain to a small child without hurting their belief why some people don't?

I went off into "some people don't believe in things they can't see, so because they don't see Santa come on Christmas they don't believe in the magic around Christmastime."

It felt blah. I hate lying. She still believes Santa is real and if you see him it's really him. So I think that she's like, well you see him (like at the mall or whatever) and he's obviously real, so what gives?

We have also talked about how magic isn't real in other contexts (like wand magic) but then she might say, except for Santa's magic and the reindeer, right?

UGH that feels gross. HELP! What do you do?

Re: Why don't grown-ups believe in Santa? What do you tell your kids?

Tricky, but we love the magic of Santa, so I am doing all I can to have my kids hold on to that.
I would say that as people get older and become grown ups and have so much responsibility, worries, etc, they lose the magic in their hearts. (Not love- that's always there) And it is harder for them to believe in things that they don't see.
It is just harder for grown-ups to believe once the magic is gone.

We never let our kids think that the mall Santas were the real guy. They look too different from one another and they become too perceptive as they get older. We tell them that Santa hires look- alikes to help him out since he can't be everywhere at once, and every once in a while, when he can squeeze in the time, it's actually HIM at the mall, so you never know.... They are convinced they saw the real one at a comic book store event a few years ago. They still talk about it. He was an AWESOME Santa. I think they might be right...

Message edited 12/4/2020 3:18:54 AM.

Re: Why don't grown-ups believe in Santa? What do you tell your kids?

For the same reason as there are different religions. Not every religion believes in Jesus as Lord and Savior, but every religion believes in a higher power, and loving your neighbor as yourself, etc.

Just because some don't believe in "Santa" doesn't mean they don't believe in the Spirit of Christmas.

I don't believe in Santa, and never raised DC to believe in Santa, but we still believe in Peace on Earth, Goodwill towards Man (and Woman), and the Peace and Joy that happens during this time of the year across the globe.

I've also raised DC to understand the beliefs of Judaism, Hinduism, Paganism, ancient Greeks and Romans, Norse, and anything DW and I can find out about any other belief system.

So, your DD and I have the same "belief", it's just manifested differently.

Re: Why don't grown-ups believe in Santa? What do you tell your kids?

It isn't allowed for adults to believe in Santa. It's only something special for children. Adults have their things and children have their things. You know like mommy likes to have a glass of wine? Yeah, Santa is like wine for children...

Seriously, I have no idea.