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KartveliT
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Message edited 12/30/2011 8:45:09 PM.
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Posted 12/29/11 1:47 PM  |
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MrsFrizzle
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Kristin
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
Can you get in trouble if you don't bring the cat back to them? You've already called them and told them the situation no now I assume they have a record of it. If you handle the adoption yourself I would imagine you could get in trouble since they clearly know you cant keep the cat.
Is there a reason you dont want to give the cat back to them? Depending on what the ramifications are if you break the agreement you signed, you may not have a choice in the matter.
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| Posted 12/29/11 2:30 PM |
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headoverheels
s'il vous plaît
Member since 6/07 42079 total posts
Name:
LB
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
We adopted from them as well and had to return the dog as per the agreement, but they encouraged us to find a home for her before we did so  We tried, posted all over, but with no takers so they took her back.
I'm so sorry you have to go through this 
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| Posted 12/29/11 2:34 PM |
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KartveliT
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Member since 1/08 8363 total posts
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
Posted by headoverheels
We adopted from them as well and had to return the dog as per the agreement, but they encouraged us to find a home for her before we did so We tried, posted all over, but with no takers so they took her back.
I'm so sorry you have to go through this
I told them 3 times over the phone "we would like to find her a home, we know some people who might be interested, we really don't want her going back to the shelter" but the woman kept saying, no, no just bring her back please "it's in the agreement"
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| Posted 12/29/11 2:37 PM |
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KartveliT
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Member since 1/08 8363 total posts
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
Posted by jkfris09
Can you get in trouble if you don't bring the cat back to them? You've already called them and told them the situation no now I assume they have a record of it. If you handle the adoption yourself I would imagine you could get in trouble since they clearly know you cant keep the cat.
Is there a reason you dont want to give the cat back to them? Depending on what the ramifications are if you break the agreement you signed, you may not have a choice in the matter.
well the reason I don't want to give the cat back is bc we'd rather find a good home for her, we don't want her sitting in that shelter any more, she was there for 3+ months before we adopted her and it breaks my heart to think that she is going to sit in that little cage waiting for someone to take her. DH told me not to bother calling them, but I did anyway, now I;m thinking I should have just done what I wanted and not care but I don't know....
I'm not sure what kind of trouble I would get into if any , but it's just so hard to know what to do.
Just the thought of putting her in the carrier ad bring her back makes me want to cry. I don't know if I can do it
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| Posted 12/29/11 2:40 PM |
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Goobster
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Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
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:)
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
If they want to take her back, PLEASE simply abide by the agreement. That is THEIR job to find the cat a home they feel is suitable, even if you know someone. Bring her back THEN tell that SOMEONE you know who you think would like to adopt the cat contact them and let Bobbi and the Strays interview that person. That's their job, please abide by the contract you signed. It is in the cat's BEST interest and it is very very wrong if you do not keep your part of the contract. They are a VERY good organization so please do not disrepect the contract simply b/c you think you know someone who would be suitable. They trusted you to adopt their cat that they took good care of. They trusted you would honor the contract.
So many times people think they have a better suitable adoptee for a cat/'dog they adopted whom they can no longer keep. Yet regular people are not experts in what to look for as a red flag re a negative or potential unsuitable home for an animal. That is what the rescue organization's expertise is in, and is simply 100% in the best interest of the cat finding a suitable FOREVER home.
BTW, some organizations do follow ups, pop by visits, etc actually to crack down on people breaking contracts and such. It is to protect the animals they dedicated their lives to helping find suitable homes.
Message edited 12/29/2011 8:19:01 PM.
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| Posted 12/29/11 4:03 PM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
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:)
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
Posted by KartveliT
Just the thought of putting her in the carrier ad bring her back makes me want to cry. I don't know if I can do it
I can understand this but I would return her, and STILL try to find her a home. If you think you know some people, contact them now, have them meet the cat BUT still bring her back. Then send those people to the rescue organization and let THEM make the determination, based on their long history of experience, who is the best suitable owner for the cat. Honestly, they are the experts who can spot potential negatives that a lay person will not be able to tell. Let them do their job, even if it hurts to know she is going back there. They are in her best interest for a FOREVER home, not another home that will be short term (which is too often what happens when a pet is given to someone else who takes it on a whim). Too many animals get rehomed again and again or wind up on the street. Even if you THINK this won't happen in your case should you give her to someone....it can and does happen all too often.
Actually Ellen Degeneres was in a battle like this...over a dog she adopted then gave to someone she knew. And she was plain old wrong to break the contract, one that she was entrusted with when she adopted the dog. It was a very public battle b/c she was breaking a very important contract she agreed to and was entrusted with.
Message edited 12/29/2011 4:14:38 PM.
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| Posted 12/29/11 4:11 PM |
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KartveliT
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Member since 1/08 8363 total posts
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
I already told few friends she will be going back and if they are interested to go and pick her up asap. There are few people interested so I'm hoping she will get picked up soon once we bring her back.
Message edited 12/29/2011 4:34:24 PM.
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| Posted 12/29/11 4:34 PM |
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KartveliT
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Member since 1/08 8363 total posts
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
it's very hard to decide and finally bring her back, since DD doesn't seem to have a sever reaction to the cat. She was def worse first 4 nights we got the kitty, she was up all night coughing and very congested, but then we got air purifiers for her BR and our LR and they seem to make a difference. She seems fine during the day other than a cough here and there, but when the allergist saw the reaction on DD's skin she said she is terribly allergic to cats and we "have to get rid of the cat" , she said no matter how much we clean and vacuum and keep DD away from coming to close contact to the cat she will still have a reaction.
The biggest problem is that she can develop asthma and have an attack one day even if she doesn't seem that bad.
So the fact that DD is seemingly ok makes it hard to finally say that's it, kitty has to go.....
I think the cat can sense something too, she has been hiding under our bed most of the day today :(
Ahhhh I just wish it wasn't this hard !
LIF keeps freezing for some reason 
Message edited 12/29/2011 4:56:31 PM.
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| Posted 12/29/11 4:51 PM |
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Peaches77
LIF Adult
Member since 1/10 993 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
Is there any way to coordinate returning the cat at the same time your friends can go and adopt it?
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| Posted 12/29/11 4:52 PM |
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KartveliT
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Member since 1/08 8363 total posts
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
Posted by MrsC2009
Is there any way to coordinate returning the cat at the same time your friends can go and adopt it?
I am actually talking to few people to see if we can do this, maybe they can come with me to the shelter and adopt her as we bring her back .
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| Posted 12/29/11 4:54 PM |
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cateyemm
Twins!
Member since 7/10 8027 total posts
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
I agree with Goobster, abide by the agreement and if you find someone who is willing to take the cat, refer them directly back to the shelter. it's in the cat's best interest!
ive seen animals get shuffled around too many times to recommend going against the contract!!
good luck!
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| Posted 12/29/11 5:23 PM |
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Diana712
RIP my beloved Brother Richard
Member since 5/07 6710 total posts
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Diana
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
you are doing the only right thing by bringing the cat back.. then refering your people to Bobbi and let them do what they do..
Message edited 12/29/2011 8:54:58 PM.
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| Posted 12/29/11 8:09 PM |
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Domino
Always My Miracle
Member since 9/05 9923 total posts
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
I wont play the woulda shoulda game so I will just address what your concern is: I would take the cat back as you agreed to in the contract. The rescue has the ability to screen potential adopters and has a responsibility to do so.
With regard to your daughter and her allergies, all I can say is that my DH is highly allergic to cats (so is his whole family) however, your body can build up a resistance. When we first got Sushi, my husband's eyes were bloodshot, itchy and watery for two weeks. I got him a bottle of Claritan and he took that every day for a month. It has been over three years and he is mainly fine. He will have an occasional flare up, usually during allergy season. It is also worse if he plays with and holds the cat and then doesnt wash his hands immediately following. We make sure we vacuum with the Dyson and brush them everyday. Most people with cat allergies are allergic to their saliva and not necessarily their fur. I had a therapist for DS over one day. My cat rubbed up against her and within minutes she broke out in hives. Now to me THAT's a severe reaction. With a lot of hand washing your daughter and your cat may be able to co-exist.
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| Posted 12/29/11 8:43 PM |
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Diana712
RIP my beloved Brother Richard
Member since 5/07 6710 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
Posted by Domino
I wont play the woulda shoulda game so I will just address what your concern is: I would take the cat back as you agreed to in the contract. The rescue has the ability to screen potential adopters and has a responsibility to do so.
With regard to your daughter and her allergies, all I can say is that my DH is highly allergic to cats (so is his whole family) however, your body can build up a resistance. When we first got Sushi, my husband's eyes were bloodshot, itchy and watery for two weeks. I got him a bottle of Claritan and he took that every day for a month. It has been over three years and he is mainly fine. He will have an occasional flare up, usually during allergy season. It is also worse if he plays with and holds the cat and then doesnt wash his hands immediately following. We make sure we vacuum with the Dyson and brush them everyday. Most people with cat allergies are allergic to their saliva and not necessarily their fur. I had a therapist for DS over one day. My cat rubbed up against her and within minutes she broke out in hives. Now to me THAT's a severe reaction. With a lot of hand washing your daughter and your cat may be able to co-exist.
If she really cant get herself to bring it back because she loves it so much then this is great advice..
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| Posted 12/29/11 9:10 PM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name:
:)
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
Posted by Diana712
Posted by Domino
I wont play the woulda shoulda game so I will just address what your concern is: I would take the cat back as you agreed to in the contract. The rescue has the ability to screen potential adopters and has a responsibility to do so.
With regard to your daughter and her allergies, all I can say is that my DH is highly allergic to cats (so is his whole family) however, your body can build up a resistance. When we first got Sushi, my husband's eyes were bloodshot, itchy and watery for two weeks. I got him a bottle of Claritan and he took that every day for a month. It has been over three years and he is mainly fine. He will have an occasional flare up, usually during allergy season. It is also worse if he plays with and holds the cat and then doesnt wash his hands immediately following. We make sure we vacuum with the Dyson and brush them everyday. Most people with cat allergies are allergic to their saliva and not necessarily their fur. I had a therapist for DS over one day. My cat rubbed up against her and within minutes she broke out in hives. Now to me THAT's a severe reaction. With a lot of hand washing your daughter and your cat may be able to co-exist.
If she really cant get herself to bring it back because she loves it so much then this is great advice..
Eh, I say when you add it all up, I would not encourage the cat to be kept. Not in this situation. I said it last week and I will say it again. Too many strikes against it sounds like to me. I would hate for this cat to have to be rehomed again a few mths down the line (and now a lot older in cat terms) when none of this improves. If Bobbi has the room for it, I say let her have her best chance at a forever home without complications, NOW.
Message edited 12/29/2011 9:39:51 PM.
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| Posted 12/29/11 9:35 PM |
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Diana712
RIP my beloved Brother Richard
Member since 5/07 6710 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
Posted by Goobster
Posted by Diana712
Posted by Domino
I wont play the woulda shoulda game so I will just address what your concern is: I would take the cat back as you agreed to in the contract. The rescue has the ability to screen potential adopters and has a responsibility to do so.
With regard to your daughter and her allergies, all I can say is that my DH is highly allergic to cats (so is his whole family) however, your body can build up a resistance. When we first got Sushi, my husband's eyes were bloodshot, itchy and watery for two weeks. I got him a bottle of Claritan and he took that every day for a month. It has been over three years and he is mainly fine. He will have an occasional flare up, usually during allergy season. It is also worse if he plays with and holds the cat and then doesnt wash his hands immediately following. We make sure we vacuum with the Dyson and brush them everyday. Most people with cat allergies are allergic to their saliva and not necessarily their fur. I had a therapist for DS over one day. My cat rubbed up against her and within minutes she broke out in hives. Now to me THAT's a severe reaction. With a lot of hand washing your daughter and your cat may be able to co-exist.
If she really cant get herself to bring it back because she loves it so much then this is great advice..
Eh, I say when you add it all up, I would not encourage the cat to be kept. Not in this situation. I said it last week and I will say it again. Too many strikes against it sounds like to me. I would hate for this cat to have to be rehomed again (now a lot older) a few mths down the line when none of this improves. If Bobbi has the room for it, I say let her have her best chance at a forever home without complications, NOW.
I am not encouraging her to keep it either I agree with what you are saying here.. And FTR bobbi is a dear friend of mine and will do the right thing for this poor little baby kitty.
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| Posted 12/29/11 9:40 PM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name:
:)
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
Posted by Diana712
I am not encouraging her to keep it either I agree with what you are saying here.. And FTR bobbi is a dear friend of mine and will do the right thing for this poor little baby kitty.
I know you are close with Bobbi and that they are excellent advocates for strays. That's why I have full faith and trust in this cat going back to this wonderful organization as agreed upon.
Message edited 12/29/2011 9:44:13 PM.
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| Posted 12/29/11 9:43 PM |
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KartveliT
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Member since 1/08 8363 total posts
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
Thank you everyone for your replies and your advice.
We just didn't know anything about shelters , agreements and so on, that's why I posted here and asked, but after reading all your replies, asking around and doing some research we ARE going to take the cat back to bobbi and the strays when we decide to do so and if someone we know is interested in adopting her they will go and try adopt her asap.
DD has an appt with a dr tomorrow, we are going to talk to him and see what they have to say and decide what we are going to do. If there is anything we can do to keep the kitty we will do everything (other than giving her shots and medication).
So sad, I'm pretty sure the kitty knows something is going on, she seems so sad, doesn't want to play, cuddle or be pet, all she did all day was eat, drink and sleep under the bed, she is still hiding :(
Thanks again.
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| Posted 12/29/11 9:57 PM |
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KartveliT
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Member since 1/08 8363 total posts
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
petted*
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| Posted 12/29/11 9:59 PM |
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Melbernai
I am a lucky Momma!
Member since 7/05 15652 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
I am so sorry that things didn't work out with you and the cat. I was really hoping that this would be a positive outcome for the cat and your family.
I think the best thing to do, as Goober suggested, is to bring her back to Bobbi and then allow them to screen the people that you know who want to adopt her. Just make sure that they apply for adoption ASAP so that no time is lost.
Hopefully this little kitty will be back into a loving home before long! I would love to see pics of the cat! I don't know if you ever shared pictures!
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| Posted 12/29/11 10:02 PM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name:
:)
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
Posted by KartveliT
Thank you everyone for your replies and your advice.
We just didn't know anything about shelters , agreements and so on, that's why I posted here and asked, but after reading all your replies, asking around and doing some research we ARE going to take the cat back to bobbi and the strays when we decide to do so and if someone we know is interested in adopting her they will go and try adopt her asap.
DD has an appt with a dr tomorrow, we are going to talk to him and see what they have to say and decide what we are going to do. If there is anything we can do to keep the kitty we will do everything (other than giving her shots and medication).
So sad, I'm pretty sure the kitty knows something is going on, she seems so sad, doesn't want to play, cuddle or be pet, all she did all day was eat, drink and sleep under the bed, she is still hiding :(
Thanks again.
My DH has severe cat allergies and asthma. That's why I cannot have cats and do not have cats since leaving my parents house. Our allergist told him there was nothing that really could be done, esp with a severe allergy. Even meds barely work (I know you wouldnt go that route but for him, they never worked). Honestly, as I have been saying all along, I would just bring the cat back asap so that Bobbi can find her a new home asap. Like I said, most organizations do follow ups to check on adopted pets. For ex, NSAL does pop by unexpected visits, so as you now know, returning the pet to the shelter is a must legally. And also...you can send any potential adopters there to apply to adopt her if you found one anyway. And even if she isnt still there at that point, there are many other cats in need that WILL be there.
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| Posted 12/29/11 10:11 PM |
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PennyCat
Just call me mommy :)
Member since 7/08 19084 total posts
Name:
Jib
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
Posted by KartveliT
it's very hard to decide and finally bring her back, since DD doesn't seem to have a sever reaction to the cat. She was def worse first 4 nights we got the kitty, she was up all night coughing and very congested, but then we got air purifiers for her BR and our LR and they seem to make a difference. She seems fine during the day other than a cough here and there, but when the allergist saw the reaction on DD's skin she said she is terribly allergic to cats and we "have to get rid of the cat" , she said no matter how much we clean and vacuum and keep DD away from coming to close contact to the cat she will still have a reaction.
The biggest problem is that she can develop asthma and have an attack one day even if she doesn't seem that bad.
So the fact that DD is seemingly ok makes it hard to finally say that's it, kitty has to go.....
I think the cat can sense something too, she has been hiding under our bed most of the day today :(
Ahhhh I just wish it wasn't this hard !
LIF keeps freezing for some reason
I know very little about allergies... so I apologize if this sounds like ignorant advice, but would it make sense to get another opinion from a different allergist?
Also, I would gauge it more on how your DD seems, than what the allergist says.
My heart breaks for your situation because my cats are like my children. I can't imagine the stress this is putting on you right now since it seems like you really love that cat  I'm a cat person so I totally understand.
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| Posted 12/30/11 1:34 AM |
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KartveliT
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Member since 1/08 8363 total posts
Name:
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
Posted by PennyCat
Posted by KartveliT
it's very hard to decide and finally bring her back, since DD doesn't seem to have a sever reaction to the cat. She was def worse first 4 nights we got the kitty, she was up all night coughing and very congested, but then we got air purifiers for her BR and our LR and they seem to make a difference. She seems fine during the day other than a cough here and there, but when the allergist saw the reaction on DD's skin she said she is terribly allergic to cats and we "have to get rid of the cat" , she said no matter how much we clean and vacuum and keep DD away from coming to close contact to the cat she will still have a reaction.
The biggest problem is that she can develop asthma and have an attack one day even if she doesn't seem that bad.
So the fact that DD is seemingly ok makes it hard to finally say that's it, kitty has to go.....
I think the cat can sense something too, she has been hiding under our bed most of the day today :(
Ahhhh I just wish it wasn't this hard !
LIF keeps freezing for some reason
I know very little about allergies... so I apologize if this sounds like ignorant advice, but would it make sense to get another opinion from a different allergist?
Also, I would gauge it more on how your DD seems, than what the allergist says.
My heart breaks for your situation because my cats are like my children. I can't imagine the stress this is putting on you right now since it seems like you really love that cat I'm a cat person so I totally understand.
Thank you .
I would love to get a 2nd opinion but DD hates getting tested for allergies and has a huge meltdown and starts shaking every time they do the skin test, so the thought of putting her though this again is very hard for us. But I am going to talk to the ENT and the PED today and see what they say. We are also thinking that we are going to watch DD and see how she does next few days. She was fine all day yesterday, not one cough, no congestion nothing, she just woke up and same, no issues. so I don't know what to think.
And of course I was up all night bc I was stressed and upset and I couldn't sleep 
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| Posted 12/30/11 7:10 AM |
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RadioLau
LIF Adult
Member since 4/07 2179 total posts
Name:
Laura
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Re: we are so very sad , have some questions (cats,allergies,shelter related) little long
This also made me think of the Ellen situation. You are right to bring her back but maybe you can be involved with the selection of the new owner. ?
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| Posted 12/30/11 12:27 PM |
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