1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

I need some advice.. We live upstate (saratoga county - 3 1/2 hours away from LI). Both of our families live on LI. We were originally going to do a small party up here for her "friends" and then a family party on LI. The more I think about it though, it's going to end up being so much time, effort and money for a party that is going to be nothing special and waaaay too crowded.

Im tempted to just do 1 party upstate at our house. We have a huge house that is great for entertaining. Im not sure how many people will be willing to travel so far in one day though...

anyone have a similar situation? WWYD?

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

We live in LI and my family and my oldest friends all live in NJ. We were thinking of doing two... a small one here and then a bigger one in NJ. We're just gonna do one big one in NJ at my parent's. They have a big house and the room. Plus, we can stay there the weekend

I say one party.

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

I would do it at your house. I'm pretty sure my family would travel. Also offer the option that they could stay over.

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

I'd do it at your house. Give an RSVP date far in advance of the party so you have time to order/cook enough food. You'd be surprised how many people will go out of their way for you and your family--we just had my DD's 1st b-day party the day after Christmas--a freezing, rainy day and had almost 100% "Yes" RSVPs with 3 last minute cancellations. It was a wild success. I've learned that you just can't please everybody and you have to do things in a way that is best for you.

Happy Party Planning!!

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

bumping for the evening crowd...what do you think? im driving myself nuts!

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

Do one party at your house.

It will be great

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

I would just do it at hour house. The next time your on Long Island, you can always have just a cake and a small gtg.

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

Message edited 12/29/2009 10:06:19 PM.

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

Do it at your house. Your family will have to travel to the party!
My sister lives in Connecticut, and both her family and her husband's family live on LI....we all went there for the party. And we were happy to do it to see her and celebrate with them there!
The party is about your child...not what's most convenient for the adults!

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

We live in CT, about 2.5 hours from most of my family on LI. We had DS' christening here in CT and a large majority of people came.

For DS' birthday we did multiple parties because it wasn't long after the christening and I felt guilty about making people travel again. Never again! I drove my crazy with different invites, food, etc. I'm still exhausted from it!!!

I would have it at your house - whoever comes, comes and it will be great.

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

I would do it at your house. Who ever wants to go will be there.

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

Message edited 12/29/2009 10:06:39 PM.

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

why would his mother be upset? Is it because she doesn't want to travel or because she wants other relatives to be there?

Is the party going to be at your inlaws? I ask because for my dds christening we had a small gathering at my inlaws and it was as if they were hosting it. I was totally pi$$ed and never again will I host a party at their house.

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

As long as the extended family is in good health & able to travel, I'd have it at your house.

It really does set a precedent that your celebrations will be in your home.

I agree that I'd invite everyone well in advance & not be offended for those that can't show.

If you had a 98 year old grandmother in ill health on LI, then I'd say have your party upstate & it wouldn't kill you to come down for cake at their house. Hosting two parties gets old fast. You'll be doing it once they're in school, so get away with it while you can.

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

We live on LI and my side of the family lives out of the area. We decided to have it at a restaurant the next town over from where we live. The close family members who I expected, and who always attend stuff are coming down to go to the party, and seem to be looking forward to it. It would be an inconvenience for us to have to have it by my parents because DH's family and our close friends live here. We are also spending a good sum on the party down here----I wouldn't want to do that twice. His b-day is tommorrow actually and he already was overwhelmed with gifts he really doesn't need for Xmas. (That's another thread though!!!).

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

I would just do the one party in your home.

As someone who doesn't live around the corner from family-- I hate that they think because we live far away, things shouldn't be here. But, it's our home/neighborhood and this is where DD lives, so this is where our functions will be.

Re: 1st B-day party dilemna - WWYD

ETA: I just hate continuing with the precedent that we have already set. We always travel and always come to everything. Its gotten to the point that if we don't come down for the littlest thing, people are pizzed and surprised. I constantly have to remind them that they see us more than other relatives that live way closer (manhattan)

Message edited 12/29/2009 10:07:45 PM.