Even though the divorce isn't final, I did start dating....but have a question.

I have been dating him for about 3 months, and he is a great guy. Treats me great, funny, sweet, etc. but I just don't feel giddy happy. Know what I mean?

Do you think it's because I am so upset about my divorce and should really be alone now, or is it that this is probably not the right guy?

Re: Even though the divorce isn't final, I did start dating....but have a question.

Only you can say if he's the right guy...but maybe he's the right guy for right now...since he's so nice and sweet and treats you well, that;s what you need right now and it's nice to share the holiday with someone you enjoy

Re: Even though the divorce isn't final, I did start dating....but have a question.

I think certain people serve certain purposes in your lifetime, and if you have fun with this guy right now and he treats you well, then maybe that is his purpose for the time being. I wouldn't over analyze it. Although I'm sure it's hard not to. Just enjoy spending the time with someone nice and hang in there!

Re: Even though the divorce isn't final, I did start dating....but have a question.

I agree. Maybe he is the man to help your realize that there are good, kind, reliable men out there. Maybe he is the man you'll marry. Maybe he is the guy you'll have fun with. No matter what, if he brings you happiness and treats you well, why not continue to see him? Only time will tell what role he will be in your life, but you are going through so much- you deserve some happiness.

Re: Even though the divorce isn't final, I did start dating....but have a question.

Re: Even though the divorce isn't final, I did start dating....but have a question.

I heard on some show that you should wait a month for every year you were together before you start dating or seeing someone after a breakup. Apparently studies show you need that time to heal before you can invest yourself into something else.

Re: Even though the divorce isn't final, I did start dating....but have a question.

You all are so right. I guess I am just trying to figure out if it's right with him or if I need to move on.

I just can't figure out how I feel about him, but I can just let it go a little longer and see how I feel.

The only bad thing happening, is when he upsets me or find out something about him i dont like, I get very very depressed and miss my ex terribly and my old life.

I just know this is going to be a long rough process....the poor guy who ends up with me!

Re: Even though the divorce isn't final, I did start dating....but have a question.

Re: Even though the divorce isn't final, I did start dating....but have a question.

My feeling is that you can't be truly happy with someone until you learn how to be happy by yourself. This divorce might not have anything to do with you...But you need to learn how to be happy without a man. And it can be done--it will make future relationships more fulfilling because your self-worth won't be tied into having a man love or want you. Find hobbies, hang out with friends...Work on yourself before putting a bandaid on the situation by finding a man to fill your ex's role. We've all been there, and those are my words of experience (not a divorce per se, but a long term relationship break up, and through watching my mom's divorce, I've seen her become such a better person by learning to love and value herself again).

Re: Even though the divorce isn't final, I did start dating....but have a question.

Re: Even though the divorce isn't final, I did start dating....but have a question.

Posted by prncssrachel

I think certain people serve certain purposes in your lifetime, and if you have fun with this guy right now and he treats you well, then maybe that is his purpose for the time being. I wouldn't over analyze it. Although I'm sure it's hard not to. Just enjoy spending the time with someone nice and hang in there!

Re: Even though the divorce isn't final, I did start dating....but have a question.

I would believe that given time you will be able to determine that. Sounds like you know hes a good catch and by hearing you say how great he treats you, you then know he is right at this time. Dont feel guilty for feeling less happy and giddy. You are going through alot at this time. Enjoy spending time with him and dont feel guilty for feeling good when you are with him. We all deserve happiness despite feeling sad at times.