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I spent the morning sobbing..

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andri
LIF Infant

Member since 11/05

241 total posts

Name:

I spent the morning sobbing..

After spending the last 10 days peeing on those Clearblue O sticks I finally get 2 lines yesterday morning! DH was called to work Saturday night because of the storm and didn't come home til 6:30pm yesterday. I was ready to get the party started at 6:31 but he wanted to take a shower & eat dinner..OK,I respect that..and even after dinner when he fell asleep on the couch,I let him rest-up..but when it hit 11:30,I woke him up..reminded him that we must BD NOW..he got all snippy saying that I have turned something that should be natural & loving into a science project.
Granted I have become obsessed with being preggo,but I mostly keep that to myself & you guys. I was so pi$$ed needless to say,we did NOT BD & I personally think he just wanted to sleep,thinking we'll BD "whenever" & I could get preggo...he needs to repeat Biology 101!

My question for the board experts is.. if we'd BD tonight..is it too late? Have I missed the boat? We last BD'd Friday morning (CD14) I got a positive O on CD16,today is CD17. Do I have a chance from CD14 or if I give it a shot tonight,will it be useless?
This is the first time I let something as stupid as pride get in between DH & I. We're in our mid 30's,not kids..I'm dissapointed in both of us Chat Icon .
Sorry it was so long,just needed to vent to someone,since I'm "too scientific" lately & not enough au`naturale.
Thank You Ladies.

Posted 2/13/06 10:43 AM
 
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Sassyz75
Turning a new page

Member since 5/05

9731 total posts

Name:
Dina

Re: I spent the morning sobbing..

once you get the surge, ovulation occurs 12-36 hours after. I got my surge on CD 18 but didn't ovulate until CD 20- so you can still be OK- I would BD and see what happens. Don't take it too hard. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 2/13/06 10:48 AM
 

icequeen4700
LIF Adolescent

Member since 5/05

505 total posts

Name:
Dawn

Re: I spent the morning sobbing..

please try not to be too upset, i think we all get a little "scientific" when that little stick turns, and sometimes BD seems not so much fun! i think you are still in a good period to conceive,how is your CM?

Posted 2/13/06 10:51 AM
 

redstar
Delay is not denial

Member since 5/05

2220 total posts

Name:
Michelle

Re: I spent the morning sobbing..

I am not sure if you are temping but if you are, you will be able to tell if you already ovulated. However, I do think you should be bding again today....bd whenever possible.

I am not sure how long you are ttc but sometimes you have to sit down on a day that you are not Oing and explain to dh what you are going through in detail. If you are in your mid thirties, you do have to put a bit more effort into ttc than someone who is younger. Explain to him what is going on in your body etc. Most men do not know, in fact I never knew, that the egg only lives 12-24 hours so timing bding is important. Explain to him the effort you are putting in, that you need him to be a partner in this as well.

Tons of baby dust ! Chat Icon

Posted 2/13/06 11:04 AM
 

andri
LIF Infant

Member since 11/05

241 total posts

Name:

Re: I spent the morning sobbing..

CM was still there this morning but not as perfect & plentiful as yesterday. All morning I feel cramping like PMS.

I'm so mopey today at the office,its like someone died yesterday Chat Icon . We have NEVER acted so childish as last night,we still said "I love you" last night & this morning but what a mood killer. He is so educated but sometimes says the dumbest things.. he refuses to believe that we have only a slim window of oppertunity every month. I guess BIO was never his forte.

Posted 2/13/06 11:08 AM
 

andri
LIF Infant

Member since 11/05

241 total posts

Name:

Re: I spent the morning sobbing..

Posted by redstar

I am not sure if you are temping but if you are, you will be able to tell if you already ovulated. However, I do think you should be bding again today....bd whenever possible.

I am not sure how long you are ttc but sometimes you have to sit down on a day that you are not Oing and explain to dh what you are going through in detail. If you are in your mid thirties, you do have to put a bit more effort into ttc than someone who is younger. Explain to him what is going on in your body etc. Most men do not know, in fact I never knew, that the egg only lives 12-24 hours so timing bding is important. Explain to him the effort you are putting in, that you need him to be a partner in this as well.

Tons of baby dust ! Chat Icon



Thank You so much for your encouraging words.
I'm not temping because I just bought the basal tem last week...thought I'd start fresh after AF. So I've been checking for positive O reading with the sticks. We have TTC since before the holidays...his way..so I thought I'd help us & mother nature by using the "scientific" approach.

Posted 2/13/06 11:13 AM
 

jcbrownie
LIF Adolescent

Member since 8/05

879 total posts

Name:
jennifer

Re: I spent the morning sobbing..

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 2/13/06 11:32 AM
 

itsbabytime
LIF Adult

Member since 11/05

9644 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: I spent the morning sobbing..

I think Redstar's advice is right on here. Once things have calmed down a bit and you are out of the "window" - sit down with your DH and really have a heart to heart with him. I think sometimes we ladies get so caught up in TTC and do all this research and chatting on the boards, with our friends etc that we forget that our DH's are not as informed and may not realize the significance of everything as acutely as we do. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 2/13/06 11:46 AM
 

nferrandi
too excited for words

Member since 10/05

18538 total posts

Name:
Nicole

Re: I spent the morning sobbing..

Dh has said the same to me, so inctead of telling him when I'm Oing I just turn up the heat on my own. Wear something sexy, make a nice dinner- do anything to encourage him to make the first move.

Posted 2/13/06 11:50 AM
 

LuvMy2Girls
@>---------

Member since 5/05

11165 total posts

Name:
Mommy

Re: I spent the morning sobbing..

Posted by nferrandi

Dh has said the same to me, so inctead of telling him when I'm Oing I just turn up the heat on my own. Wear something sexy, make a nice dinner- do anything to encourage him to make the first move.



This is great advice! I would do the same thing. Make him forget you are trying to have a baby. My DH said the same thing to me at the beginning of TTC, he didn't want to feel like a piece of meat(yah, get that one), or feel pressured to perform on command and feel like baby making was a chore. He wanted sex to be natural.

I seduced him so many times during "o" times he didn't even realize it was baby making time.

Posted 2/13/06 12:41 PM
 

mrsmck
Be a big girl!

Member since 5/05

4898 total posts

Name:
Donna

Re: I spent the morning sobbing..

sometimes my DH is the same way. I'll send him an e-mail at work saying that tonite/tomorrow might be a good time. he says fine. Like you, I'm ready to go as soon as he walks in the door, but he needs to do a million and one things beforehand. then you look at the clock, and it's like midnight, and he says "good night, i'm going to sleep". My reaction is Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon have you not heard what I said???? Chat Icon Chat Icon

It makes me angry also that they say they want the same things we do, but when we tell them "it's time", they don't do anything about it. I even showed him the +opk stick, proof that NOW is the time, and all I get is Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Stay strong!! We're here for you!!!!

Posted 2/13/06 12:52 PM
 

casey31
Mommy of 3!

Member since 5/05

2967 total posts

Name:
Mommy to two boys and a girl

Re: I spent the morning sobbing..

I'm sorry you are going through this- BD'ing tonight still sounds like a good possibility.

DH and I had a long talk too...he told me he feels "alone" in this because I've been so obsessed. He's right, I am! But I feel like if I don't do all of these things with the temping and the BD timing and the pre-seed and my 8 supplements a day- it won't happen.

After a talk, we agreed to try more of a partnership about it....

Try talking to him like everyone said...i bet next month (if tonight doesn't work) will be a lot better. Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 2/13/06 1:10 PM
 

pmpkn087
Life is good...

Member since 9/05

18504 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: I spent the morning sobbing..

We just started TTC and DH said he doesn't know if he can BD on the spot, when we are "told" we should BD at that time.

So, he asked me not to even tell him when I O, and I agreed. he said it will take of some of the "pressure"Chat Icon

Posted 2/13/06 1:10 PM
 

andri
LIF Infant

Member since 11/05

241 total posts

Name:

Re: I spent the morning sobbing..

Posted by mrsmck

sometimes my DH is the same way. I'll send him an e-mail at work saying that tonite/tomorrow might be a good time. he says fine. Like you, I'm ready to go as soon as he walks in the door, but he needs to do a million and one things beforehand. then you look at the clock, and it's like midnight, and he says "good night, i'm going to sleep". My reaction is Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon have you not heard what I said???? Chat Icon Chat Icon

It makes me angry also that they say they want the same things we do, but when we tell them "it's time", they don't do anything about it. I even showed him the +opk stick, proof that NOW is the time, and all I get is Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Stay strong!! We're here for you!!!!



OMG,they must be brothers!!!
At lunch I just e-mailed him a bunch of O info,hoping to give him something to think about before we have this much needed talk tonight.
I also called him but didn't think its fair to get into it at work..he just said he was sorry about last night & "what's wrong with doing it tonight,tomorrow night,Thursday,next week,etc" HE STILL DOESN'T GET IT !!!
Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 2/13/06 1:19 PM
 

Ali1
Mommy

Member since 8/05

3116 total posts

Name:

Re: I spent the morning sobbing..

Sometimes guys just are not in the mood. Just to make you feel better...me and DH were not able to BD on the day i O'd (he was too tired from work) and i wound up getting preggo. So you definetly can still get preggo if you did not BD on the day you O'd.

MY best advice is instead of making it a regular thing and saying "we have to because i am o'ing" spice it up a bit and maybe make a nice dinner or wear something a little provocative. That might put him much more in the mood.

Good luck and baby dust. Chat Icon

Posted 2/13/06 2:09 PM
 

andri
LIF Infant

Member since 11/05

241 total posts

Name:

Re: I spent the morning sobbing..

Thank You everyone for your kind words.
Today was just awful...I'm hate feeling so sensitive.
I was researching & found this:

Q: Once I detect my LH surge, when should I have intercourse?

A: It's best to have intercourse the day of the LH surge and the two days after. Also consider "insurance" sex for one more day in case you ovulate late. Perfect timing would be to have had intercourse the day before the LH surge as well, but that can be hard to predict for those with an irregular cycle. If you don't know when you might ovulate, having sex every other day from cycle day 10 through a positive OPK. If you are taking your basal body temperature, you should have sex through the first day of your temp rise to make sure you cover all days (though after the rise is usually too late).

So maybe I'm O'ing today? I'm not sure "cause I didn't Temp
Chat Icon this month (that'll teach me)

Posted 2/13/06 3:16 PM
 
 

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