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Message edited 10/4/2006 10:34:06 PM.

Re: Vent about MIL

Honestly I would not take it personally. Maybe she has some things going on in her life too and has been busy. Most people do not realize what an important issue this is for those of us going through IF. She will call you when she has a chance I am sure.

Re: Vent about MIL

Re: Vent about MIL

I think you handled yourself well.

I would think most people would understand that when given bad news you wouldn't want to talk about it at that moment. Heck, many people won't ever want to talk about it.

As for DH... could it be that he was afraid he would get some of the clinical information wrong? The lingo, etc?
I know I had to explain the difference between IUI and IVF about a billion times to my DH before he understood and I'm a teacher... I get paid to explain Sometimes they have so much clinical information about our bodies thrown at them they just develop the glazed-over-Golden-Retreiver-HUH stare (you know when they title their heads in confusion ?)

I also think that your VM to her was appropriate. You did go into detail.

If you couldn't talk then, your DH wouldn't explain and you left a VM so soon after the fact then I just don't know what more you can do.

Hopefully, your MIL will realize that it is YOU right now who is the needy one and needs support not her. Has the she pulled "the silent treatment" before?

Re: Vent about MIL

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Message edited 10/4/2006 10:33:15 PM.

Re: Vent about MIL

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Message edited 10/4/2006 10:32:53 PM.

Re: Vent about MIL

It could be like kara said that maybe she is just busy this week, or it could be that she is a little nervous to talk to you. Maybe she is scared she won't understand all the clinical stuff or maybe she is afraid that she won't react in a way that you want her too. Either way, she should have made an effprt to call you back sooner. But, she will call, and you will talk to her and it will be fine. However, now she knows that you prefer to have a little space and hopefully next time she will wait a little and not pressure you to talk so soon. She sounds genuinely concerned but a little bit of a "nudge."

I hope it all goes okay when you talk to her- sorry that this is only making things harder for you.

Re: Vent about MIL

Posted by juju

Posted by Tah-wee-ZAH



As for DH... could it be that he was afraid he would get some of the clinical information wrong? The lingo, etc?
I know I had to explain the difference between IUI and IVF about a billion times to my DH before he understood and I'm a teacher... I get paid to explain Sometimes they have so much clinical information about our bodies thrown at them they just develop the glazed-over-Golden-Retreiver-HUH stare (you know when they title their heads in confusion ?)

I also think that your VM to her was appropriate. You did go into detail.

If you couldn't talk then, your DH wouldn't explain and you left a VM so soon after the fact then I just don't know what more you can do.

Hopefully, your MIL will realize that it is YOU right now who is the needy one and needs support not her. Has the she pulled "the silent treatment" before?

Funny how you mentioned about the lingo......I sent an email to my parents and DH because he is not home.....and it pretty much explains everything what my doctor has mentioned thus far. I did a lot of copying and pasting. I get exhausted explaining over and over......and then when I mention IVF....people think it is not my egg or his sperm..... But, I want better communication with my DH and my parents in regards to IF issues.

Silent treatment-Yeah, me and DH, had a falling out for about a month with her last year. That was the only time. So I kinda have a feeling she is upset. Her past actions in general are somewhat passive aggressive.

Message edited 4/22/2006 1:14:49 PM.

Re: Vent about MIL

Message edited 10/4/2006 10:33:45 PM.