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My friend just said....(Vent, long sorry!)

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puppylove
LIF Adolescent

Member since 10/05

561 total posts

Name:
Summer

My friend just said....(Vent, long sorry!)

I'm was just on the phone w/ a friend. She told me a bunch of our girlfriends went out last night, as well as a few other times this month. I asked why no one ever calls to invitie me out. She says well you're married, it was just the single girls, so we figured you were busy. I said well you could have at least tired me. Then she said just think of this as practice for when you guys start a family, you'll never get to come out! Chat Icon

She said she was just kidding around, & brushed it off. But for some reason it hurt my feelings. My group of freinds is mixed, some married, some with families, some single. In the past we have always hung out together, no matter the ratio of single to married in the group.

Do you think I should bring it up again, & tell exactly what's on my mind? Way to make me feel totally left out! Chat Icon

Can't wait for DH to come home from work & give me a hug, at least he still loves to hang with me. Chat Icon

Posted 11/15/05 6:44 PM
 
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Nik09
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

1982 total posts

Name:
Nikole

Re: My friend just said....(Vent, long sorry!)

I think people feel like when you are married that you are always busy. I would tell your friend that you want to hang out and would like to be invited next time they all go out together. You may be married but you're not DEAD! Chat Icon

Posted 11/15/05 7:15 PM
 

MrsS2005
Mom of 3

Member since 11/05

13118 total posts

Name:
B

Re: My friend just said....(Vent, long sorry!)

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon That's really awful. Do you think they're jealous b/c you're married now? Maybe they're having a rough time seeing their friends get married while they are still single. Definitely let your friends know that just b/c you're married doesn't mean that you don't want to go out with the girls any more.

Posted 11/15/05 7:26 PM
 

puppylove
LIF Adolescent

Member since 10/05

561 total posts

Name:
Summer

Re: My friend just said....(Vent, long sorry!)

Thanks ladies. I really don't know where this came from, since our group of friends is mixed with married and unmarried girls. It is possible that this particular girl is jealous. But still, there are somethings that I wish people wouldn't say. It's as if she only said it to get a rise out of me. There was no other good reason to say it. Thanks for listening, I appreicate it.

Posted 11/15/05 7:51 PM
 

HereWeGoAgain
LIF Adult

Member since 7/05

1063 total posts

Name:
a

Re: My friend just said....(Vent, long sorry!)

I would plan my own girls night out.. and call her (jokingly) and say Well.. I wasnt gonna call you cause I am now an old married fart and not sure if you still wanted to be bothered with me.. lol.. and then invite her.. I did that after I got married.. and the friend apologized cause she caught my drift.. HTH

Posted 11/15/05 7:54 PM
 

rose825
Best Friends

Member since 6/05

10228 total posts

Name:

Re: My friend just said....(Vent, long sorry!)

I have a group of friends that did that to me. I was sooo hurt!! Even if I couldnt come it would have been nice for them to call. We discussed it and we are still friends but its not the same anymore.

Posted 11/16/05 7:48 AM
 

Shelly
She's 7!!!

Member since 8/05

14624 total posts

Name:

Re: My friend just said....(Vent, long sorry!)

I went through that when I started dating DH. I told my friends that we weren't joined at the hip and I could go out without him. then when I moved into the city and DH and I moved in together, some friedns would do that because of the same thing.

The truth is that a lot of people DON'T want to go out with their single friends when they are married. Make it clear to your friends that you are not one of them and tell them to include you when they make plans. They should elt you decline rather than assume your busy.

I don't think they meant to hurt you- some people just don't know what to do when it comes to these kinds of things. They don't want to intrude on your marriage and they think inviting you out would do that. Its silly.

Message edited 11/16/2005 9:33:51 AM.

Posted 11/16/05 9:33 AM
 

MamaNDaddyof3
:)

Member since 5/05

7267 total posts

Name:
Mommy

Re: My friend just said....(Vent, long sorry!)

I would call the other girls that went out too and tell them to try you next time they go out

Posted 11/16/05 6:54 PM
 

iffer042373
5 weeks till I'm a big sister

Member since 5/05

2642 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: My friend just said....(Vent, long sorry!)

I understand what your feeling my friends are very mixed as well and we alltry to get together and this has happend a few times that they didn't include some of us and it hurt us so then we had our own little get together and when they found out they were hurt and wanted to know why they weren't invited so I said becuz we have been excluded for having kids so we all got together with kids and they were like well we would of loved to see allthe kiddies together but at least they knew how it felt

Posted 11/17/05 3:15 PM
 

SoinLove
Making big changes

Member since 5/05

16541 total posts

Name:
Kristin

Re: My friend just said....(Vent, long sorry!)

Posted by HereWeGoAgain

I would plan my own girls night out.. and call her (jokingly) and say Well.. I wasnt gonna call you cause I am now an old married fart and not sure if you still wanted to be bothered with me.. lol.. and then invite her.. I did that after I got married.. and the friend apologized cause she caught my drift.. HTH



I think this is a great idea! Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 11/17/05 4:33 PM
 

Stefanie

Member since 5/05

23599 total posts

Name:
Stefanie

Re: My friend just said....(Vent, long sorry!)

I would be hurt...
Things change when you get married but seeing friends shouldn't. It seems as if your friend thinks that once you're married, you can do anything fun again. I like that idea posted above...I think she'd get the hint then..Chat Icon

Posted 11/17/05 10:58 PM
 

lvdolphins
My Loves!

Member since 5/05

46292 total posts

Name:

Re: My friend just said....(Vent, long sorry!)

I would be hurt. Our group is mixed as well..some married, my bro is engaged and we have single people. We include everyone, every weekend.
I do have a friend that said to me "Now that you are getting married, I will never see you again.."..WRONGGG...LOL
She's now married and we hardly see HER cuz she's so busy every weekend.
She's a member on here too...She knows I love herChat Icon but its funny that she thought I'd be the one who was never around.Chat Icon
Def. give your friend a call and let her know how you feel.Chat Icon

Posted 11/19/05 12:28 PM
 
 

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