Venting - The other week wrote about how I was scared about starting to TTC and how I was going to ask my Dr.

I had a regular check-up today and I told my Dr. that I think we are planning to TTC in the Fall, but I'm a little scared. So she said kids are great! and that we should stop in June -- so I said so you mean now!!

Also told her that I got this baby vibe in April I really wanted to start and so this will be my last pack, then May will be my last pack. So she said I'm getting rid of your crutch (my BC) and prescribing prenatals. I was like So she then left the room and I started to a little -- I just wish she wasn't so abrupt - maybe I shouldn't have even brought it up.


I did talk to my Husband about TTC and me feeling scared. He's not scared at all, he's been ready. He said when ever you feel you are ready, but I feel like this can go on forever. And I don't want to disappoint him on me not being ready. I want kids, but times flies by so fast -- because it feels like I was just planning my wedding and I now I can't believe that I could be a Mommy one day and that one day could be in the Fall or whenever?

I spoke with my mom a few days ago and she said why are you thinking too much about it. She said when we wanted to, we just did it and that was it.

I don't know why I have such a barrier on this -- I knew I wanted to get married, so how come I can't come to a definite answer on TTC?
Or maybe I really do want to start deep down inside and its like a little push?

I hope I didn't bring this board down.
Thanks for letting me vent.

Message edited 6/8/2006 4:56:16 PM.

Re: Venting - The other week wrote about how I was scared about starting to TTC and how I was going to ask my Dr.

I have no idea how old you are but if I knew then what I know now I would not have waited as long as I did.

Re: Venting - The other week wrote about how I was scared about starting to TTC and how I was going to ask my Dr.

I'm 28

Re: Venting - The other week wrote about how I was scared about starting to TTC and how I was going to ask my Dr.

I am the same age as you. A few months ago, I was all gung ho to start TTC - note the screename, lol. But then I got scared and put it off.

I love my life right now - living in NYC - just me and DH and although I know I will love my life with a little im just scared because obviously, once we go down that route there is no turning back and this time will never return.

Add to that my fears about EVERYTHING baby related - ttc, pregnancy, the health of the baby, my health, finances, having to get a home, raising children etc etc...it was just too much!

yet, at the same time, i feel my clock ticking away and think i need to get moving because i am getting old and im afraid of the complications if i put it off...

so no advice, just

Re: Venting - The other week wrote about how I was scared about starting to TTC and how I was going to ask my Dr.

I just finished my last pack of pills last week. It took many conversations and a lot of compromise to come upon this decision. We just got married a lil less than 4 months ago. If I didnt have my age to contend with, I wouldn't be so quick to TTC. But my concern with increasing my chances of having a child with a disability or waiting only to find that I may not be able to TTC (for ANY reason) told us that the time was right for us right now. It will be hard but with a supportive family and friends, there is no reason for us to wait.

However (and here is where I can relate to your feelings) once I realized that I was not going to buy BCPs or use another form of BC for a looooong time, it hit me hard. I questioned whether or not I was ready for it. I questioned if I would be a good parent, if we had enough money or if I was ready to put some helpless, defenseless being before myself. I am scared too.

But then I think about so many women whose situations are one million times worse than mine. I am not living in poverty. I have a home and I have insurance to care for my child as well as myself. After I look at that, I realize I will be just fine. We will be just fine. If people entrust the care of their children to me each and everyday in a school setting, then I can most certainly care for my own children. I remember visiting a friend of mine in the hospital just when she delivered her first. They planned to have this child, but when the nurseplopped the kid in her lap and said "feed it", she looked at me as if to say "W T F do I do now?" She was scared.

I think your fears are real. You are lucky though, you have a supportive husband who will be there for you and your child.

Re: Venting - The other week wrote about how I was scared about starting to TTC and how I was going to ask my Dr.

It's natural to be scared. I was so gung ho, and then when I came off BC, I was nervous every month...am I really ready? But after coming off BC I realized my cycles were all screwed up because of PCOS and I got very upset and I felt again how much I wanted it. Now everything keeps getting pushed back and I have a test, try something new, wait to see what happens...

The first step might be to just come off BC and start charting your temp. If you have no problems, you can do it whenever the time feels right. If you do have problems, at least you found out earlier and have time to correct them.

Re: Venting - The other week wrote about how I was scared about starting to TTC and how I was going to ask my Dr.

ALthough I knew when I was ready TTC, I was still VERY nervous, and although we were trying, I'll never forget when I got that first BFP. It was a Sunday morning at 5am, and me and my DH just sat in the kitchen staring. We were petrified, but we knew this was still what we wanted.

My point is, you may always be nervous, you have to do what's right for you and DH. I am a bit surprised of how abrupt your doc wa with you. And seriously, you are only 28, that's still young these days.

Good luck with whateve you decide!!!!

Re: Venting - The other week wrote about how I was scared about starting to TTC and how I was going to ask my Dr.

Having a baby is a very big decision maybe more so than getting married. So I can understand you being more scared now then with getting married. Your responsible for another life that will take away as well as add to the life you have now. Im not trying to scare you further I can only tell you from my experience kids are the best thing that can happen to you in life. I have 5 and have posted because Im deceiding whether to have one last one. Your doctor should not have taken your decision into her hands and should have just listened to you. Good luck and we are here for you.

Re: Venting - The other week wrote about how I was scared about starting to TTC and how I was going to ask my Dr.

I go through this too. Let me tell you my story. We got maried in June 05. Got PG Aug 05. Had a M/C Sept 05. Been trying ever since. Still I even go through those times where I think am I ready? I have always thought about being a Mom. I think it is normal to doubt if you are ready, but when will you ever be truly ready? Unfortunately Mother Nature has certain ideas about when we should and shouldn't becomne pregnant. So I would say the younger the better it seems.
PS I am 32

Re: Venting - The other week wrote about how I was scared about starting to TTC and how I was going to ask my Dr.

It is not an easy decision and not one that others should make for you. If you are still hesitant, then maybe you should be cautious. I do think that it will not hurt to get of the BC & start taking FA or PNV, as they will only help you in the long run anyway.

try to relax a little and think about what youreally want to do...it will come to you

Re: Venting - The other week wrote about how I was scared about starting to TTC and how I was going to ask my Dr.

Thank you all SO VERY much! I feel a lot better, I guess I needed to talk to someone.

MsMBV, I was thinking the same thing...it wouldn't hurt to go off the BC and plus it will take some time for my body to get back on track.

And I was thinking of buying some books to inform myself so I won't be so scared -- I have to re-read TCOYF since now coming off of BC I could understand it better and start to chart.

Thank you again