Choosing Godparents...

DH and I have been discussing our choices and he wants to pick his Godson as our son's Godfather. But his Godson is 13 years old! I know that technically you can be a godparent as long as you have received baptism, communion and your confirmation. But isn't that a little too young??? I just feel like they are not mature enough to understand being a godparent s. DH is like "yeah but when our son is older his godfather will be only 13 years older and still young enough to play ball with him, etc." I am not crazy about the idea. He's a great kid but he's a little immature too, but that's because he's still a kid.

DH was like "but my brother choose his wife's 16 year old nephew as godfather to their third son"...So why do we have to do what others do??? We are starting to argue about this and I don't want it to stress me out!

What do you think ladies?

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I personally think that 13 is young BUT my godmother, who is my 2nd cousin, was 13 at the time! I know that she and my mom had it out at some point because she wasn't "acting" like a godmother, in hindsight I think "DUH" she was only like 16 or 17 which is also young.

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I became a Godparent at 12. My brother became one at 11. My sister became one at 17. I think it is great honestly. I am all for it.

At this point I am 27, godson is 15. I see him in church serving every Sunday, go to his games, we have a very special connection. (He is also my brother)

My other brother, Reilly, became one at 11 to my sister. They have such a special relationship. They go to ballets and shows together.

My other sister, Coleen, is my little cousin's godmother. She goes to his house twice a week, goes on walks with him, reads to him...has a true love for him.

A lot of my aunts and uncles are each other's godparents too, I guess when you have a big family, it is more common.
I think I am going to do the same thing, mainly because if you pick someone young, they aren't married and don't have any kids. Your kid is going to be sooooo special to them.

Good luck whatever you chose!

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I find nothing wrong with it. My godmother was 13 when she became mine (she is my cousin) and we are very close. She has stood by me in all of my important religiious choices as well.

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We chose my sister and her DH (our BIL). Both devout Catholics we are close to and love I think it's ok to choose any age, it's just a personal preference.

My Godson (their son) recently made his confirmation and chose his 16 year old cousin to sponsor him so I just think it's a personal choice. Best of luck to you in whatever you decide

Message edited 1/12/2006 3:18:35 PM.

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Nothing against his Godson. He's a great kid but i'm just not comfortable with the idea.

Does he have to be Godfather to our son in order to play sports with him. He can still do that with him.

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will the godparents hold certain responsibilities or will it be more of a symbolic tradition?

we will ask my sister to be the godmother and along with that she will be responsible for raising the child should anything ever happen to the both of us. as far as the godfather goes, we haven't really decided yet!

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I personally think 13 is too young. I really think it should be somebody who knows who they are in life. At 13, he can't possibly know what direction his life will take, religiously, let alone be able to be there for another person. I know alot of people think of it as just an honor, and a title, but I think it should be a person who can help your child find their way -- not just play sports. I agree with you. DH's godson can still play baseball and do alot of other things with your child even if he isn't his godfather.

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IMO I think 13 is too young. My SIL picked her 14 yr old cousin (now 18) who is currently not involved with the family.

I am having a very hard time with this issue myself.

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I don't think it's too young. I became my brother's godmother at 10. Now, he's my son's godfather.

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I'm not sure about age...but for us, as long as the godparents can provide a good role model and help our child follow the faith. We chose people who actively practice their faith and who make it a part of their daily lives instead of someone who never goes to church, etc.

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Well my godparents su_k!!! my parents picked godparents that were in their mid 20's and they haven't acted like godparents since they were chosen. I havent talked to my godmother in 23 years. Her doing not mine. She just fell off the earth. She called my dad 12 years ago when my mom died but never bother to speak with me.

But my DH became his nephews godfather at the age of 10. ( russian orthodox) And he is a great roll model.

So the age isnt always a deciding factor.. at least not in my family

Message edited 1/13/2006 4:32:10 PM.

Re: Choosing Godparents...

Well if you are Catholic, you cannot have a Godparent that is not at least 16. I'm surprised that a RC church would allow a 13 year old, never mind an 11 year old, to be a Godparent.

IMO, 13 is too young to be a Godparent. You (general you) have no idea what kind of person you are at 13, so how would they be a role model to your (general your) child?

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For Catholics, 1 person has to be a confirmed. The other doesn't have to be. So you could not do two 12 year olds...1 12 year old and one adult.

ETA: I was only 14 when I was confirmed..by being confirmed, you are choosing to be Catholic.

Message edited 1/13/2006 2:05:24 PM.

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Each church is different with different rules. My friend's church required BOTH godparents to be confirmed and have proof of it. Mine requires only one.

I think it really depends on what a godparent means to you and what feels right to you.
I don't think age is as much of a factor as those things.

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My DH's godparents are his brother and his cousin who were both 11 at the time! I think 11 is a bit young. Now DH's brother is 45 and he's my daughter's godfather which I think is nice...so dad and baby have the same godfather. I feel 11 is a bit young, but I'm out of the loop--I'm still trying to figure out how my niece's godfather is Jewish!

ETA: I don't think 13 is a problem

Message edited 1/13/2006 4:24:02 PM.

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Message edited 1/14/2006 12:35:30 AM.

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I have 2 godson's Elijah and Isaiah. I am 24. I have no children of my own yet. I think being a godparent is a big responsibility. Maybe too big of a resposibility for a 13 year old to handle. A godparent is someone who not only guides the child towards the Lord but is also someone who is there for them in all aspects of their life. They are like a second set of parents. And they aren't only there for the children they are there for the parents also. My godsons' parents know they can count on me and my husband for any help they need. We are a shoulder for them to lean on. And we are there to help to help them through any rough times. Our family is not catholic. But they felt that a godparent is someone who will help raise their kids to be upstanding citizens with good morals and values and also someone who would raise their kids how they would if anything were to happen to them. All in all a godparent is someone you trust and someone your kids will trust. Being a godparent isn't just about teaching the kids how to play ball it's about so much more. Maybe your husband should talk to the 13 year old about it and explain to him what it means and see if he even wants the responsibility. I love my godkids more than anything (ages 4 and a week and a half) and would do anything for them.
Sorry so long.
Amanda
godmom of Elijah (who calls me his angel mom) and Isaiah!