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LBG30
:)
Member since 9/05 3423 total posts
Name:
Noelle
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I am alittle upset..alittle long sorry
As I posted last week I met someone on match and we went out 2x and had a really good time. But, if you guys remember reading he is older than me , divorced and has 2 kids. We talk on the phone all the time and I think I am starting to like him.
I am the youngest in my family. I have a brother who is the oldest and my sister(Tanaholic)
My brother knows about this guy and he is telling my sister that he will not allow me to date this guy that he will never be nice to him and that my dad(who passed away 8 months ago) would NEVER approve of this. But, bottom line is that my brother is being a pain about this whole thing. He has not said anything to me but my sister said he was ranting and raving about this situation to her. I know its not a normal situation and maybe my dad would not approve of it if he was still here but I do know that my dad would want me to be happy. I know my brother just is watching out for me but it's just annoying! Nothing can ever be easy!! I mean who knows what will happen with this guy but we get along great and I have had a lot of fun with him.
My mom knows about what's going on with this guy and she was a little upset too at first too but she is not so crazy over this like my brother!
Sorry for this to be so long-but I just had to get this off my chest a little.
I am still going to meet other people and still keeping my options open. I went out with someone last night. He was really nice but a little too short for me.
Ok I think I said enough
Thanks for listening.
Noelle
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Posted 11/6/05 3:06 PM  |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name:
The cure IS worse!
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Re: I am alittle upset..alittle long sorry
It's seems to me as though your brother's flip is is quite a bit premature. I mean its only been 2 dates!
Besides that, if you go out with him more and more and you like him than that is ALL that should matter? What's the root of your brothers madness? Is it that he is older? Is it that he is divorced? Is it that he has two kids?
I think that you should confront your brother find out what is upsetting him so much and try to nip it in the bud as soon as possible...although that is only if you can honestly see a future with this man...if not, then just let your brother spout off.
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| Posted 11/6/05 3:12 PM |
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Re: I am alittle upset..alittle long sorry
Can you talk to him about it? That stinks he's not giving him a fair chance. It is nice of him to care so much about you and to try and look after you like your father would have. Try and talk to him and definitely keep your options open in the dating scene like you've been.
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| Posted 11/6/05 3:12 PM |
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Re: I am alittle upset..alittle long sorry
Wow, your brother is being really unfair, IMO. Finding someone you like is very hard, and if this man is being good to you, and is a good person, that's the most important thing.
I understand your brother's concern, but you're a grown woman who can think for herself.
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| Posted 11/6/05 3:16 PM |
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LBG30
:)
Member since 9/05 3423 total posts
Name:
Noelle
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Re: I am alittle upset..alittle long sorry
Posted by DebG
It's seems to me as though your brother's flip is is quite a bit premature. I mean its only been 2 dates!
Besides that, if you go out with him more and more and you like him than that is ALL that should matter? What's the root of your brothers madness? Is it that he is older? Is it that he is divorced? Is it that he has two kids?
I think that you should confront your brother find out what is upsetting him so much and try to nip it in the bud as soon as possible...although that is only if you can honestly see a future with this man...if not, then just let your brother spout off.
I know its only 2 dates but I know he is just looking out for me. My brother is older and married but with no kids. I mean I can't really say that I see a future with him cause it has only been 2 dates!! But, it just is making me mad that my brother is acting like this. I guess we will see what happens. I know being that my dad is not around maybe he feels that he has to look after me and maybe that's why he is acting in this way.
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| Posted 11/6/05 3:24 PM |
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dm24angel
Happiness
Member since 5/05 34581 total posts
Name:
Donna
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Re: I am alittle upset..alittle long sorry
Is he that much older? What is the issue that no one seems happy about? Sorry I dont see the problem? I know they are just looking out for you, but sounds like they need to step back and let you live your life a little. Even if it was a mistake, well thats life, and thats how you learn.
Good luck.
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| Posted 11/6/05 3:42 PM |
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Myrockette
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Member since 5/05 5632 total posts
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Re: I am alittle upset..alittle long sorry
sounds like my brother when I started dating my DH. Eventually, he realized that I was getting serious and his 'say' wasn't going to change that. It just kinda fell into place from there
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| Posted 11/6/05 3:58 PM |
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LBG30
:)
Member since 9/05 3423 total posts
Name:
Noelle
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Re: I am alittle upset..alittle long sorry
Posted by dm24angel
Is he that much older? What is the issue that no one seems happy about? Sorry I dont see the problem? I know they are just looking out for you, but sounds like they need to step back and let you live your life a little. Even if it was a mistake, well thats life, and thats how you learn.
Good luck.
My brother and I are 4 yrs apart. I think he is not happy that he has kids and was married before and 12 yrs older than me. My parents were 12 yrs apart and my sister mentioned that to my brother and he said "its diffferent".
I don't know-why can't anything in my life just be easy!!!
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| Posted 11/6/05 4:04 PM |
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Moehick
Ready for the sun!
Member since 5/05 30339 total posts
Name:
Properly perfect™
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Re: I am alittle upset..alittle long sorry
Sometimes divorced guys can be the greateset....my older brother is divorced and unfortunately he did everything he could to save the marriage but she was cheating on him so that was it. Just because he is divorced doesn't make him a bad guy.
It has only been 2 dates so hopefully your brother will calm down
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| Posted 11/6/05 4:27 PM |
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Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!
Member since 10/05 29450 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: I am alittle upset..alittle long sorry
My opinion on this - and I have told you this before Noellie - I don't think there is any harm in getting to know this guy and seeing where it goes. I do think that you need to take things slowly though and def. do not limit yourself to only seeing him. I know that you met another guy last night and I think that is great. I think that you should continue on Match and continue to see what else is out there. Once you tell yourself that you are ready to find someone (which I believe that you are) - you really have to look and go after what you want.
Knowing you the way I do - I think that it is good that you are getting to know this guy - I just do not want you to fall into a rut with him and get serious without seeing what else is out there.
IMO - Kids are a huge deal. He already has two children who will be in his life always. That is alot to take on. Is this guy my first choice for you - NO - but will I support you if you decide that he is the person you want to be with - YES - I just want to make sure that you know that your options are endless.
Your brother has to feel a huge responsibility now being the "man of the family" and he is just looking out for you. He doesn't want you to settle IMO.
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| Posted 11/6/05 5:38 PM |
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dooodles
When you wish upon a star
Member since 5/05 11997 total posts
Name:
Because 2 people fell in love
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Re: I am alittle upset..alittle long sorry
I am sorry your brother is putting stress on you after only 2 dates. I can't see the harm in continuing to see him if you do get along with him. It's not a religious thing or the way you actually met him is it? How much older than you is the guy you met?
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| Posted 11/6/05 6:18 PM |
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LBG30
:)
Member since 9/05 3423 total posts
Name:
Noelle
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Re: I am alittle upset..alittle long sorry
Posted by dooodles
I am sorry your brother is putting stress on you after only 2 dates. I can't see the harm in continuing to see him if you do get along with him. It's not a religious thing or the way you actually met him is it? How much older than you is the guy you met?
No-its not a religious thing or the way I met him. I knew him before we met on match anyway. I used to work with him 5 yrs ago.
I am 12 yrs younger than him.
Like I said, my brother has not said anything to me-he has been telling my sister and sister-in-law that he does not approve of this.
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| Posted 11/7/05 10:09 AM |
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momAGAIN
so outrageous
Member since 7/05 3853 total posts
Name:
TJ
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Re: I am alittle upset..alittle long sorry
well i first have to say its your life do what makes YOU happy! I have had experience in this area trust me on both ends my ex husband was Black and my brother being the italian thick headed man that he is disagreed with me completely but my ex made me happy (at the time) and that is what matterred to me....so in short my brother and i didnt speak for years!!! now on the flip side i am divorced with 4 kids and met Fh online his father hated me (never met me) but just the idea of Fh getting involved with me and all that responsibility...but now 3 yrs later we are best of friends! You have to live your life for you nobody else....best of luck!
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| Posted 11/7/05 10:29 AM |
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Kate07
Feel better my little guy!
Member since 5/05 4476 total posts
Name:
Kate
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Re: I am alittle upset..alittle long sorry
It is obvious your brother has best intentions - but he is not your father, and really does not have a right to not allow you to date anybody. I'm sure he just doesn't want to see you get hurt, but you are an adult and can make your own decisions. And you shouldn't have to worry about your brothernot supporting you or talking about it behind your back if it doesn't work out.
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| Posted 11/8/05 6:31 AM |
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