This is a long shot but figured I would ask...LONG..

I know this is a long shot and a very odd question at that but I figured I would try...

My mom takes care of my 94 year old grandmother. She lives in my moms apartment and although there is nothing physically wrong with her, her dementia has gotten pretty bad. She cant be left alone at all which leaves my mom pretty much trapped most of the time. Unless I come over (like I am now) to watch her, she has to switch off with my sister even if she wants to get an errand done. Its very stressful. She doesnt have any help coming into the house. She lives in a small apartment in queens so you know how that goes..to have another person in here, would be more of a hassle than anything else.

Anyway..she is dieing to get away with the family. I would love to go upstate before the baby comes and have one more weekend of relaxation away from everything. But the thing is, we have no place to put grandma. She cant make the drive comfortably, and we obviously cant leave her alone here. I was wondering if anyone knew of any places that would take her for a weekend??? Does something like that even exist?? I am sure regular nursing homes dont do this and I have been researching and researching to no avail. Does anyone have any suggestions..there are no other family members or friends that can watch her for the weekend so that is out. Does anyone know of anywhere that would do this just for a weekend??

I know its an odd question but thank you in advance!

Re: This is a long shot but figured I would ask...LONG..

Have you tried Visiting Nurse Services?? I would try calling them, Even if they dont do what you are asking, hopefully then can steer you in the right direction.

Or you could try Senior services of Nassau County or Suffolk.. (division of Social Services)

Re: This is a long shot but figured I would ask...LONG..

Yup, look into a private nurse service. Out here in NJ, they charge $30 per hour (even sleeping hours),but you may be able to get a better price since you're in a more populated area

Re: This is a long shot but figured I would ask...LONG..

there are respite services for caregivers. I dont know how they work though. I am sure that you could hire a private aide to come in for the weekend and stay with her.

Re: This is a long shot but figured I would ask...LONG..

actually some nursing homes will help you out, and if they can't they will direct you to the right places to call. try medford multi care on horseblock road in medford. i use to work there. they should be able to direct you in the right direction good luck! i wish i could help out but i am no longer doing that kinda care. but if worse comes to worse let me know and i will see how i can get for you! i know alot of cna, and lpns that do home work that maybe she can stay home with someone!

Re: This is a long shot but figured I would ask...LONG..

Atria in East Northport is an assisted living that does respite care.

Re: This is a long shot but figured I would ask...LONG..

It sounds like your grandma needs to be in a nursing home. Dementia is a such a debilitating and demanding disease that it's pretty hard especially for those that provide the care for their loved ones. There's no resting moment as they always have to be checked. I think if your mom was to do this, it will help her emotionally and it will free up some of her time so that she can take care of herself and the things she has to do. It's a very tough decision though. Your mom can always go to visit her every day to make sure they are providing good care for her.
You probably have the option of having a private aide come into the house to care for her. There are some agencies in the city such as Partners in Care which can provide such services. To tell you the truth, not all of the agencies hired at times the best people to do these type of jobs and not so good stories abound about this. You can always look into it. You can contact the Visiting Nurse Service of NY but a doctor will need to make the referral for you when they call. Then in turn, they will provide names of agencies in the city who provide this service and how much they charge. It also depends on the kind of insurance she has. They will give you options as well. The city of New York(I can't remember your original post but I think you said she lives in Queens) also provide home attendants but I think they provide this on a more permanent basis rather than on a hire-per-days. Your mom should look into this so that she can probably get someone to come to the house to help her to care for her in the event she doesn't want to put her in a nursing home. You should also go to a few nursing homes in the area she lives and see if they provide any kind of service in regards to this. And even if they don't, they can steer you in the right direction.
Is there someone known that your mom can hire to do this? Sometimes that's a best route.

Message edited 7/2/2006 10:49:49 PM.

Re: This is a long shot but figured I would ask...LONG..

Sunrise assisted living will take her for the weekend.
Call them!

Re: This is a long shot but figured I would ask...LONG..

How about a local church outreach program. There might be a retired person who will be willing to help out for a day or two. If she is physically sick sick where a nurse isnt necessary this might be a option. I would call a larger church and speak to the director of the outreach program and see if they have anyone to help you out. They might even be able to have a couple of middle school/ high school kids come over for a few hours (for their community service hrs) just so you mom can get out, do laundry or even take a long bath.

Re: This is a long shot but figured I would ask...LONG..