Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

I already made it clear to DH and Families that I'd like our first night home to be just DH, Baby and me.

How do I handle who comes and stays with us after. Both my Mom and MIL want to stay with us. I guess it's my MIL that I'm really not looking foward to having here.

I guess I 'm just nervous about how I will feel afterwards and my Mom will be supportive however I need her to be. My MIL takes everything so personally and doesn't know her boundaries.

Suggestions?

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

I'm lucky because my MIL was the one who made the suggestion that we tell everyone that we didn't want any visitors for the first few days. Though some people didn't listen, I appreciated her consideration of us. She didn't come to stay with us until Jake was 1 month old. My mom came around the same time although she here for his birth.

To answer your question, it was just me, the baby, and DH.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

my dad and stepmom arrived from NY the day after we got home from the hospital (we got home at 10:30 at night on Fri, they got here on Sat) and stayed for 4 nights.

MIL and FIL will be here in a few weeks and my "real" mother will be here on Mon for 3 nights although that won't be much help to me. Then my sister will be here in Feb as well.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

DH & I were alone -but my sister was living right next door. It took every ounce of willpower they had not to come over. My mom would stop by with full dinners cooked.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

My in laws live next door and my mom lives 10 mins away. So no one stayed the night but they all came over the day we brought him home.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

We don't live near either sets of parents, but my mom was definately going to be the first stay with us. In my opinion your mom gets first dibs if you want her to have it. The morning I went into labor my parents got in the car and drove from LI to Ohio. I had Jack at 4:30 and they were at the hospital that night. We came home the next day and both my mom and dad styed for a few days then my dad went to their house in FL and my mom stayed with me to help me out for 2 weeks.

In laws came to visit that weekend but stayed in a hotel.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

We did the same thing, no visitors the first day. I came home on a Friday. Family and friends came to visit on the weekend. Frankie took the next week off and then my Mom came to stay for a week and then my MIL came for a week.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

It was me & My husband. We had a visitor here & there. But nobody stayed w/ us.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

The day she came home my parents stopped by and my SIL (we were just so happy to have her out of NICU we didn't care that they came over)

The first week she was home my mother took vacation days and only came over if I needed her. She was such a big help. If DH was running errands, she came over to help me (I had a c-section) or if I needed to go to BRU or a store DH took care of the baby and my mom took me to the store. My SIL was a big help too.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

We came home late morning from the hospital, so my mom and MIL & FIL came by for a few hours. But DH & I were adamant that nobody stay with us. We wanted to get used to having a baby and the nighttime routine as quickly as possible.

ILs stayed at my BILs apt for 3 weeks, but came over almost every day while DH was at work. My mom didn't want to intrude on their time since they live in FL, so she didn't come over much those first 3 weeks, but then would stop by after work or on the weekends. She lives in the same town as we do. My dad came for a 3 day weekend visit when she was about a month old, he stayed with us but arranged for his own transportation.

My parents are really good about offering advice when we ask, but keeping their mouths shut otherwise. They know that I don't really like to be told what to do, I'm more of a hands on person.

MIL likes to tell me how she did it (30 years ago!) and tell me that I'm doing everything wrong, it finally got to a point where I had to say "You learned by trial and error and I need to do the same. Every baby is different. I appreciate the advice, but right now I'd be more comfortable trying things my way and then if I need help I'll definately ask." She wasn't really happy about it, but she had to respect my request.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

I made it VERY clear that we would have NO overnight visitors when I came home from the hospital. I didn't care one bit who else wanted it differently.
This is the time to set boundries. If you and your DH want to be alone with your baby...then you just say "I know you are excited but WE have decided that the first few nights we would like to be alone. You can visit us during the day but we are not hosting overnight guests for a bit".
WHy should anyone stay with you? If you want help that is totally fine. But if you would like some time to feel better, learn bf (if you are doing that) and bond with your baby...then just that. Don't aologize or explain. Just state the answer.

That is what I did and if someone didn't like it I am sorry, but my husband and baby and ME come first.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

We made it clear no visitors the 1st week.... my dad visted the day he left (the day after I came home from the hospital) but thats it!... and my IL's were ******....

I didnt care though....I wouldnt of wanted any other way...

It was nice to just be alone...not to worry what the house...or I looked like!

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

The first day home - I wanted no visitors - just the three of us. The first day after that we had one family over to visit, the next day the other. It was visits not for care...no one stayed overnight or anything like that. My mom offered to stay but I rather do it alone. After that it was just DH and I, DH took a week vacation and got a week paternity (although baby was in hospital - extra few days - so he had less time at home with him).

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

I stayed at my MIL's for a week. The help was nice and def appreciated but I was glad to finally get home.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

No one. We said we'd have visitors during the day, but just us overnight. Both sets of our parents live 1/2 hour away, so it wasn't a big deal.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

With my first son who is now 3 1/2 I had a baby nurse and she did help alot. Iwas able to sleep, I am not having ababy nurse this time but my parents will stay with us for a few nights. My parents live in florida and the more i can see them the better. I refuse to let my MIL sleep here unless its an absloute emergency. My in-laws can visit but thats it. After my parents go back to florida its all us.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

No one stayed with us. We had visitors through out the week, but not there to help, just see Juliette.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

My MOm was here almost every day AFTER my hubby returned to work, she's stop in while he was home during the 1st week we were home,. but she really kicks in after he went to work and arrived one my doorstep with coffee and bagels each mornign for about the 3 weeks, She did this with all 3 of my kids, she'd spend the day, or run errands for me, or just come so I could take a shower. She's like Mary Poppins, so she would come in and cook dinner, clean out the fridge, vacuum, et, but I love that stuff too so I;d be right along next to her helping!

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

Noone stayed with us ever. People would come by during the day but that is about it. Actually my DH went back to work the day after we came home!!! He is a workaholic Sales guy. In anycase we did just fine, I actually liked it better I wanted to be the one taking care of him.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

No one. But DH took the first 2 weeks off to stay home with us.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

My mom and dad came down the day before I was leaving the hospital and stayed with me for a week which I loved and my MIL stayed at my BIL's house but only came over a few times while she was in town.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

My mother and MIL didn't sleep over...but they made up schedules to visit me...while DH was working. But I think that my situation was a little different than usual. James came home from the hospital 72 days after he was born...when he did come home he was still on Oxygen and hooked up to a pulsox machine...and even though he wanted to sleep...every time the machine beeped he woke up....so between the beeping machine and James' actual needs, and pumping every 3 hours...since James couldn't latch on...I wasn't getting any sleep at night...so I welcomed visits from mom and MIL ....it was the only way I got to sleep and shower.

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

Re: Who stayed with you when you arrived home from the hospital?

DH's mother flew in from Israel about 2 days before I delivered. I thought I would be uncomfortable with her there, but it turned out that she was a lifesaver. She helped so much without being intrusive at all. She let Dh and I tend to Alex while she cleaned the house and prepared all our meals for us. Honestly, when she left, I cried like a little baby for days. She's coming back in two weeks to stay with us for a couple of weeks and I couldn't be more excited!