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What do we give?

Forum Opinion Poll
$350 38 88.37%
$ but not as much 4 9.30%
gift thats worth $350 1 2.33%
gift but not as much 0 0.00%
 

wedding gift advice

Posted By Message

Laura1976

Member since 5/05

5754 total posts

Name:
Laura

wedding gift advice

DH and I have been trying to figure out what to give to his brother (we'll call him Bob) for his "wedding" present.

Bob and his fiance' eloped in February and are now having a party to celebrate. We got married 3 months ago with usual big wedding reception and Bob was our best man and gave us $350 for our gift.

Bobs party is in someones backyard with a tent etc. our question is do we give money or a gift and do we give/spend the same amount that he gave us?

Posted 7/21/05 10:12 PM
 

julz33
i run for bacon

Member since 5/05

20584 total posts

Name:
julz

Re: wedding gift advice

If you had to give him less money due to financial reasons, then that is fine... but because he is having a backyard tent wedding is no reason to lower the gift. Tent weddings can cost just as much if not more than a catering hall.

Posted 7/21/05 10:16 PM
 

neenie

Member since 5/05

22351 total posts

Name:

Re: wedding gift advice

i would most likely give the same. I think all the other points that surround this topic Are logical,, but i look at a gift as a Gift... not 'covering your plate'. i know that you definately spent more than him to have him at your wedding, but then again, he may have spent more than you to be In your wedding. I feel like it does kind of even out in the end Chat Icon

Posted 7/21/05 10:18 PM
 

DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it

Member since 5/05

18602 total posts

Name:
The cure IS worse!

Re: wedding gift advice

Posted by neeniebean86
i know that you definately spent more than him to have him at your wedding, but then again, he may have spent more than you to be In your wedding. I feel like it does kind of even out in the end Chat Icon



I think this is a VERY valid point.

Posted 7/21/05 10:19 PM
 

suvenR
designer mutt

Member since 5/05

4239 total posts

Name:

Re: wedding gift advice

I might go a little lower because you're not actually going to his wedding. He got married already. This is a celebration, but not a wedding.

Posted 7/21/05 10:22 PM
 

sunny
Life is good!

Member since 5/05

8369 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: wedding gift advice

I would give the same.

Posted 7/21/05 11:54 PM
 

Gertyrae
Peace out Homies!

Member since 5/05

20046 total posts

Name:
Gerty ®

Re: wedding gift advice

Posted by DebG

Posted by neeniebean86
i know that you definately spent more than him to have him at your wedding, but then again, he may have spent more than you to be In your wedding. I feel like it does kind of even out in the end Chat Icon



I think this is a VERY valid point.



Make that three!

Posted 7/21/05 11:58 PM
 

Tah-wee-ZAH
Kisses

Member since 5/05

15952 total posts

Name:

Re: wedding gift advice

Posted by Gertyrae

Posted by DebG

Posted by neeniebean86
i know that you definately spent more than him to have him at your wedding, but then again, he may have spent more than you to be In your wedding. I feel like it does kind of even out in the end Chat Icon



I think this is a VERY valid point.



Make that three!



Yes, I'd give the same. He probably encountered more expenses than you did.

Posted 7/22/05 6:59 AM
 

Redhead
You Live, You Learn

Member since 5/05

31871 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: wedding gift advice

Posted by neeniebean86

i would most likely give the same. I think all the other points that surround this topic Are logical,, but i look at a gift as a Gift... not 'covering your plate'. i know that you definitely spent more than him to have him at your wedding, but then again, he may have spent more than you to be In your wedding. I feel like it does kind of even out in the end Chat Icon


I AGREE!

i would give him 350 like he gave you. I really don't think it matters where he is getting married, tent vs. hall, imo that is really inconsequential

Posted 7/22/05 7:06 AM
 

bellarina
She's my dancing queen!

Member since 5/05

1752 total posts

Name:

Re: wedding gift advice

He's family and not just an acquaintance. I would definately give the same.

My SIL got married a year after me. She gave us $600 for our wedding (which we had in a really nice hall and spent a lot of $ on it) and she had a very small, private wedding with only immediate family and a few close friends in a local resturant. My DH and I never thought of giving her less $ than she gave us just b/c she didn't spend as much on her wedding as we did. It's the thought, not how swanky the wedding is.

JMHO

Posted 7/22/05 8:43 AM
 

NoStressMom
My Heart and Soul

Member since 5/05

11122 total posts

Name:
D

Re: wedding gift advice

Give the same

Posted 7/22/05 9:14 AM
 

june262004
But I love the Snow!

Member since 5/05

15379 total posts

Name:
Kristin

Re: wedding gift advice

Posted by julz33

If you had to give him less money due to financial reasons, then that is fine... but because he is having a backyard tent wedding is no reason to lower the gift. Tent weddings can cost just as much if not more than a catering hall.



I agree!!

Posted 7/22/05 9:16 AM
 

Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn

Member since 5/05

27567 total posts

Name:
Janice

Re: wedding gift advice

my cousin gave me 300, then a year later she eloped, and no party at all. I sent a card for 300. DH actually loved not having to take off work, worry about clothes, cab rides home from wedding. Give the same present no matter where wedding is held or who is throwing it.

Posted 7/22/05 9:18 AM
 

lullabella
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

2246 total posts

Name:

Re: wedding gift advice

I agree with the other posters. Why does it matter where they are getting married? I wouldn't even consider that, escpecially since he is your DH's brother. JMHO I am also very generous with my family so...

Also I wouldn't base the gift on what he gave you. What I am saying is if my brother gave me $350 I would give him what I want to give him, in my case it would be more.

Message edited 7/22/2005 9:59:21 AM.

Posted 7/22/05 9:57 AM
 

AnnBrunoXO
2 Girls For Me!

Member since 5/05

4377 total posts

Name:
MaMMa

Re: wedding gift advice

I would give the same amount he gave you.

Posted 7/22/05 10:00 AM
 

ggt08
;)

Member since 5/05

5208 total posts

Name:

Re: wedding gift advice

I would give the same amount as well...

Posted 7/22/05 1:00 PM
 

Palebride
I am an amazing bakist

Member since 5/05

13673 total posts

Name:
Lori

Re: wedding gift advice

I would give the same, unless you can't for financial reasons

Posted 7/22/05 1:06 PM
 

boosh1002
We like hanging together!

Member since 5/05

5475 total posts

Name:
Mommy to twins

Re: wedding gift advice

I would give the same amount too

Posted 7/22/05 1:18 PM
 

Scotty-CassidysMom
and Dylan too!

Member since 5/05

4331 total posts

Name:
Stacy

Re: wedding gift advice

definately the same...I'm sure he actually spent WELL more than $350 because he was in your BP

Posted 7/22/05 1:25 PM
 
 

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