Are you a "Text Book" Mom???

When my husband and I decided to start our family I began reading many books about how to care for one. I have very little experience with little babies and wanted to become more knowledgeable about the do's and don'ts. (Unfortunately, our moms live out of state.) With some motherly instincts that kicked in, seven months and many read books and a couple Parenting Magazine subscriptions later, I think I've done a pretty good job....NOT to toot my own horn.

However, I realize that sometimes I'm a bit of a "Textbook Mom" and it won't be fatal if I vear away a bit. I must say that I have gotten ALOT better and more relaxed than the initial couple months but I admit that the remenants of a textbook mom is everpresent. Babies don't come with manuals regardless of the books available. LIF is proof that sometimes the best way is actually the best practice suggested from more experienced moms. Easy to say but sometimes a little hard to swallow. Can anyone else identify?

Re: Are you a "Text Book" Mom???

I am not thank goodness - however, when I first had Michael I had a habit of opening up medical books and diagnosing him with crazy things! I quickly gave up that habit when the doctor told me to put down the books!!!

I do keep the What to Expect books handy because I do find them helpful when I have a quick question...

But the best advice I have been given is directly from BTDT mom's - message boards, friends, family...

Re: Are you a "Text Book" Mom???

I don't consider myself a textbook mommy, but I'm sure that many a BTDT mommy on here would probably consider me one! Hey, it's my first time doing this so what do I know. Like you, both my moms live out of state, so DH and I have had to fend for ourselves quite a bit.

I do a decent amount of reading and then I try to read my baby and find the middle ground. Being a new mom, I'm sure I lean more to the textbook side but I know there are certain things we don't do and didn't do by the book and it worked for us.

I don't think there is a "best" way though. I don't think that being a textbook mom is always a bad thing either. Either extreme could be bad. And yes, sometimes advice from the BTDT moms can be hard to swallow...but you have to just listen to your gut sometimes and decide what advice to follow and what to ignore. That's hard to do sometimes too.

Re: Are you a "Text Book" Mom???

Not at all. I read very few books and actually ended up practicing "Attachment Parenting" which for the most part is instinctual/natural parenting based on following your babies cues and meeting needs as they come up.
I don't do things that I thought I would do such as enforce a schedule, CIO, follow the vaxing schedule, etc.
It works for us and I've learned to be comfortable with how I parent Miranda because what works for one family may not work for another.
Yes my mom and MIL definitely don't always agree with how we do things but DH and I agree so that's what matters and out daughter is happy and healthy.

Re: Are you a "Text Book" Mom???

I don't consider myself a "text book" mom so much but I do read a lot.. my DH teases me because everytime there is something going on with the kids or we're moving into a different stage he says "oh it's time for a book" I come up with my own parenting style, but it doesn't hurt to have some insight from others.

Re: Are you a "Text Book" Mom???

I'm not...I followed my pregnancy week by week book but as soon as Jared was born, I didn't read any books on grpwth and diseases. My friend consults with her book on a daily basis...and she makes herself crazy.

Re: Are you a "Text Book" Mom???

The first few weeks I read What to Expect the First Year religiously and realized I had to stop because I was driving myself insane if she wasn't doing something they said she should. I spoke to my ped. and he said that those are really just guidelines, she's healthy and he wasn't worried. It's been a lot better since I put the book down!

Re: Are you a "Text Book" Mom???

Right now I am not a text book mom but I did order a book baby week by week but that is only because I want to know whats going on in her lil mind and body (maybe I will send it back)!! lol

Re: Are you a "Text Book" Mom???

It funny I was planning on posting a topic similar- I think that I try to follow the "rules" for certain things and not for others. I read all instructions for things and try to do the best I can following them. Im not a schedule mom by any means and I do practice a bit of attachment parenting with the go with the flow routine and co sleeping. I do try to gain knowledge about different develpomental things and methods of parenting. Most people would say that Im a bit over cautious as a parent but Its my first -whereas my Sil is sooo different- she doesnt read at all, never really reads any instructions and she does whatever feels right to her- doesnt care if she's not doing the right thing according to "them" and it works for her- I myself could never be that way because Im tooo paranoid that something would happen and I would blame myself for not following the rules.

Re: Are you a "Text Book" Mom???

Re: Are you a "Text Book" Mom???

I was at first and it drove me crazy-I think since i'm a nurse I know a little "too much" about illnesses, etc... and of course, always think the worst when it comes to a medical problem or illness. For example when Jenna spit up a lot as a newborn I was convince it was reflux or at worst pyloric stenosis when of course she was just being a normal spitty-up baby. I used to drive myself crazy but now I think i've lightened up.

Re: Are you a "Text Book" Mom???

I'm not. If I had questions w. Patrick I would call my sister who lives out of state but, is a Mom of 3. (My mom passed away & my MIL has limited speech due to a stroke) I was on the phone to her quite a bit in the first couple of months. But, 95% of the time she said I was doing what she would have done!

Re: Are you a "Text Book" Mom???