just wanted to add another family drama story

Lets just say a very close person to me and their wife (betcha can figure that one out) had a miscarriage in feb and when they found out I was preggo they could not seem more disappointed then they were. They NEVER ask a single thing about this baby, dont look at its sono pics, and clearly do not give a sh#t. Now if you were tell me they were still upset, I would agree. However, her best friends giving birth a week before hers would have been due and she is all over her, doing everything, including wanting to be at the hospital. What the heck is that? I am getting tired of this and to be honest...we all get together weekly and my blood pressure is sky rocketing when we are all together. Any advice?

Re: just wanted to add another family drama story

Good luck- I don't know how to handle difficult family members any better the next other than to limit our time together and ignore 90% what they say. Its so hard.

As for the miscarriage, that is a poor excuse to not even acknowledge your pregnancy. I had my SIL find out the day I had my D&C and although it killed me in the beginning I was incredibly supportive. Sometimes you have to push your feeling aside for the other person.

I would try the smile and ignore method. That's what I have been trying to do- I feel like a phony but its the only way.

Re: just wanted to add another family drama story

It's probably all the attention that you're getting from everyone that's bothering her the most. She wated to be the "star" and now the focus is on you. Just avoid her when you can and give in to the fact that she may possibly stink as a person.

Re: just wanted to add another family drama story

I agree, I would do the phony thing even though its really not the person you are.

Its hard to do, be the bigger person and all that, but she is so obviously selfish and not worth your thoughts/aggravation.

Re: just wanted to add another family drama story

I can understand having a hard time acknowledging a pregnancy right after a m/c. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with. BUT....the whole friend thing versus your pregnancy throws a wrench in the works. It sounds more like a jealousy thing rather than still mourning kind of a thing. And I'm sure this isn't this first time she may have shown some jealousy towards you. Just guessing.

If I were you, I'd try to put everything into perspective. Try not to let your blood pressure rise when you're with her...I'd expect nothing so when she does something great you can be surprised.

Re: just wanted to add another family drama story

my advice is to stop getting together with her. Her miscarriage, although very painful, is a lame excuse to ignore your happiness.

What is wrong with people

Re: just wanted to add another family drama story

Personally I would just not give much thought to this person or include her in much of my life. She clearly is not interested in my life or my child, for whatever reason so I wouldn't force it. Just be polite but other than that don't bother to interact with her too much.

Re: just wanted to add another family drama story

Thanks for all your advice
Okay now I am gonna share an extended secret...
remember last week when we talked about "Obligated godparents" There ya go...heres mine! Ugggghhhh