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btrflygrl
me and baby #3!
Member since 5/05 12013 total posts
Name:
Shana
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Looking for opinions from both SAHM and working moms....
I have a GREAT situation right now....I work off the books (which is great come tax time and for when DH goes back to school) and I take Alyson with me. The only negative is I'm there 5 days a week almost all day and I feel like my home is so neglected and I'm way overwhelmed with stuff that is needed to be done at home. Lucky for me DH doesn't complain as long as he gets fed and has clean underwear.
I've been debating whether I should look for a "real" job with better pay and put Aly in daycare. The cost ranges from $100-$150 a week. I'd have to make at the minimum $15 an hr to account for JUST daycare.....that's not including gas costs if I have to drive.
Any advice? We're making things work, it's tight, but it works.
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Posted 8/14/06 5:12 PM  |
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monkeybride
My Everything
Member since 5/05 20541 total posts
Name:
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Re: Looking for opinions from both SAHM and working moms....
OK first other than the house stuff are you happy doing what you are doing and having Aly with you or are you craving something else? I know its probably a mixed bag of nuts having her with you. On one hand its great not to use day care but it's probably also challenging at times (at least I think for me it would be) especially as she gets older.
If you're happy with the situation you have now is there any chance of getting a raise? You've been there a year right? Would she be upset to lose you and do something to keep you? so that things aren't as tight?
I think working off the books will definitely help DH's ability to get grants and othe financial aid when he goes to school so it might be worth holding out just for that. What about daycare through whatever school DH decides to go too? Maybe that would be an option and then you could get a different job?
As for the house stuff is there some kind of system you and DH could come up with where you do one or two chores together each nigth so that you don't feel like everything has to be done all at once?
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| Posted 8/14/06 5:19 PM |
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sunny
Life is good!
Member since 5/05 8369 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Looking for opinions from both SAHM and working moms....
Well, I am full time working mom.
It is all dependent on if you need the extra money. If you think you house is neglected now, wait until Aly is in daycare all day, and you want to spend every minute of being at home with her.
Then nothing at home gets done at all!
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| Posted 8/14/06 5:21 PM |
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btrflygrl
me and baby #3!
Member since 5/05 12013 total posts
Name:
Shana
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Re: Looking for opinions from both SAHM and working moms....
Stephanie,
TY for your input. The house isn't dirty...just messy, ya know?
Jen,
I'm happy there because of the situation....I love not having to pay for daycare and being with Aly all day long, but at times I can't get anything done and think it's unfair for her to pay me to watch my baby there when I can do it at home. She plays golf, when football season starts she won't be there on Sat, I feel like I'm held responsible for alot of things (like paying the store bills? why do I have to remember that?) I had mentioned that when I had Aly I'd like an extra day off or to cut back my hrs but when I'm not there I swear nothing gets done.
I doubt the school he'll go to has anything like that since it's a small Christian college
Like I said, we're making things work but I REALLY want to be a SAHM which is not feasible right now.
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| Posted 8/14/06 5:40 PM |
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Heather
LIF Adolescent
Member since 7/06 647 total posts
Name:
Heather
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Re: Looking for opinions from both SAHM and working moms....
if you are happy where you are and can bring Aly with you, I think you should stay there.
Maybe you can get a cleaning lady to come in once a week - this'll be less $$ then putting her in daycare
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| Posted 8/14/06 5:44 PM |
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monkeybride
My Everything
Member since 5/05 20541 total posts
Name:
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Re: Looking for opinions from both SAHM and working moms....
Posted by btrflygrl
Stephanie,
TY for your input. The house isn't dirty...just messy, ya know?
Jen,
I'm happy there because of the situation....I love not having to pay for daycare and being with Aly all day long, but at times I can't get anything done and think it's unfair for her to pay me to watch my baby there when I can do it at home. She plays golf, when football season starts she won't be there on Sat, I feel like I'm held responsible for alot of things (like paying the store bills? why do I have to remember that?) I had mentioned that when I had Aly I'd like an extra day off or to cut back my hrs but when I'm not there I swear nothing gets done.
I doubt the school he'll go to has anything like that since it's a small Christian college
Like I said, we're making things work but I REALLY want to be a SAHM which is not feasible right now.
Well since being a SAHM is what you really want to do I don't think working FT and putting Aly in daycare is something you'll be happy with. Right now you kind of have the best of both worlds and if she's not complaining and is paying you then I wouuld stick with that job.
As for having extra responsibilities and her not giving you time off you had asked for perhaps you could approach her for a raise since she doesn't pay any kind of benefits, social security, etc for you. Every little bit help so even if its $1 an hour it adds up over the year especially since you get to take it all home.
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| Posted 8/14/06 7:31 PM |
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dee7772
My Loves
Member since 5/05 4852 total posts
Name:
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Re: Looking for opinions from both SAHM and working moms....
Posted by monkeybride
Posted by btrflygrl
Stephanie,
TY for your input. The house isn't dirty...just messy, ya know?
Jen,
I'm happy there because of the situation....I love not having to pay for daycare and being with Aly all day long, but at times I can't get anything done and think it's unfair for her to pay me to watch my baby there when I can do it at home. She plays golf, when football season starts she won't be there on Sat, I feel like I'm held responsible for alot of things (like paying the store bills? why do I have to remember that?) I had mentioned that when I had Aly I'd like an extra day off or to cut back my hrs but when I'm not there I swear nothing gets done.
I doubt the school he'll go to has anything like that since it's a small Christian college
Like I said, we're making things work but I REALLY want to be a SAHM which is not feasible right now.
Well since being a SAHM is what you really want to do I don't think working FT and putting Aly in daycare is something you'll be happy with. Right now you kind of have the best of both worlds and if she's not complaining and is paying you then I wouuld stick with that job.
As for having extra responsibilities and her not giving you time off you had asked for perhaps you could approach her for a raise since she doesn't pay any kind of benefits, social security, etc for you. Every little bit help so even if its $1 an hour it adds up over the year especially since you get to take it all home.
I think this is great advise and couldn't agree more.
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| Posted 8/14/06 7:33 PM |
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MABLE03
I <3 SATC
Member since 6/06 4563 total posts
Name:
Fabulous
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Re: Looking for opinions from both SAHM and working moms....
Posted by monkeybride
Posted by btrflygrl
Stephanie,
TY for your input. The house isn't dirty...just messy, ya know?
Jen,
I'm happy there because of the situation....I love not having to pay for daycare and being with Aly all day long, but at times I can't get anything done and think it's unfair for her to pay me to watch my baby there when I can do it at home. She plays golf, when football season starts she won't be there on Sat, I feel like I'm held responsible for alot of things (like paying the store bills? why do I have to remember that?) I had mentioned that when I had Aly I'd like an extra day off or to cut back my hrs but when I'm not there I swear nothing gets done.
I doubt the school he'll go to has anything like that since it's a small Christian college
Like I said, we're making things work but I REALLY want to be a SAHM which is not feasible right now.
Well since being a SAHM is what you really want to do I don't think working FT and putting Aly in daycare is something you'll be happy with. Right now you kind of have the best of both worlds and if she's not complaining and is paying you then I wouuld stick with that job.
As for having extra responsibilities and her not giving you time off you had asked for perhaps you could approach her for a raise since she doesn't pay any kind of benefits, social security, etc for you. Every little bit help so even if its $1 an hour it adds up over the year especially since you get to take it all home.
couldn't agree more. You said yourself you are very happy with the situation right now and it is the best of both worlds. If its not broke don't fix it. If you really want to be a SAHM you will be miserable working full time with your DD in daycare full time.
Sell stuff on ebay on the side to make extra money if possible 
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| Posted 8/14/06 7:34 PM |
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