major breastfeeding issues-- on the verge of quitting

well I posted a last week about Bryan not taking a bottle so then I finally tried and tried and he took a bottle and now he wont take the breast at all- he just ***** for like 2 minutes and then cries and cries and he does this back and forth but when I give him the bottle he seem so peaceful and he gulps down 5-6 oz no problem. The past drs appointment I had mentioned this to the dr and he told me to continue nursing and that either he has nipple confustion or has reflux but I just dont think that I can take this. I feel so stressed watching him cry at my breast- I though this was supposed to be a peaceful experience. Not to mention that I cannot even think about breastfeeding in public becuase he would draw wasy too much attention with all the crying. I have seen other moms breastfeed before and their children seem so at ease they just stay latched on and eat and until they are done. Bryan is off and on like a million times during the session and crying the whole time in between.


I want to give up and just use formula- he seems to like it much better and its so much less stressful but I feel so guilty because I wanted to at least make it to 6 months and I know that breastmilk is best. I was doing so great until about 10 weeks and then the problems started. I was thinking of upmoing full time but my supply isnt that great either and I hardly get even 2 oz from pumping...I need advice...


eta- I have been ebf for about 14 weeks now

Message edited 9/28/2005 5:47:15 PM.

Re: major breastfeeding issues-- on the verge of quitting

i'm so sorry you are going thru such a rough time. I did too with both Danielle, and more recently with Sofia. I don't have any solid advice or suggestions, except only to keep trying to pump. they say the more you pump, the more you produce, but i didn't see that much of a difference in my production when i was pumping....so, go figure.

it's good that you've been bf for 14 weeks....they say the first few days/weeks are the most important b/c that's when your anti-bodies are strongest in your colustrum (sp?)/milk.

keep trying, and if all else fails, DO NOT feel guilty about starting him on formula!! you are a good mommy to want to keep trying to bf, but if it's not possible, it's not possible. don't beat yourself up about it!!!

Re: major breastfeeding issues-- on the verge of quitting

I went through this with Jesse - still do. As they become more aware of their surroundings, they don't have the attention span to just feed. They'd rather see what's going on everywhere and when you try to make him eat instead of look around he cries. I would get so frustrated and I had to remind myself "he's just a baby". Try to be patient and remember that he will eat when he's hungry - he won't starve himself.

Jesse is five months now and still looks around all the time - feeds about 30 seconds, stops, looks around, goes back to feeding, etc. He doesn't cry anymore though. I think the crying is just a stage. He probably likes the bottle better because it's less work for more milk. You can also try burping him when he stops feeding. Sometimes when I'd put Jesse upright he'd laugh a bit and then I'd try to feed him again.

Try not to get discouraged - I know it's hard. And don't just give up and give him a bottle or he will never want the breast. If you have a routine where you always give him a bottle at a certain time, continue that. But all other times, make him take the breast and if he doesn't, don't worry. Just stop feeding at that time. When he's hungry he will nurse.

Re: major breastfeeding issues-- on the verge of quitting

When you pump do you notice that it takes a while for a let down to occur?? If so maybe you could pump for a few minutes before you nurse to get things started that way when Bryan gets to the breast the milk is ready to flow. Or massage the breast and express some milk first. I used to do that with sidney cause she used to pull and tug and cry at my breast. Not as much as you are describing though. I used to also feed her right after i got out of the shower cause the hot water got things flowing. (you could use a warm wash cloth and massage breast)
I also used to only get 2-3 oz when i pumped. Very frustrating. But now I pump in the middle of the night and that is where i get the most milk...4-6 oz. Plus you need to be relaxed. Not relaxing when a baby is crying I know. I only give sidney the bottle about once a week because i felt the same thing was happening

Also, when you give him the bottle maybe you should use a premie nipple to get a slower flow. And take the bottle away to burp him after every 1/2 ounce. Slows down the process.

I really hope things work out for you....keep us posted.