Im having a real hard time BFing...

Sorry for the bajillion questions lately.. I just dont know what Im doing... Ive spoken to LLL, others in my family who BF, and to my sons peditrician..and the all say the same thing...

My son did lose a little more weight than usual in the hospital (i think it was because he really didnt eat...the lactation nurses did not help me AT ALL) The DR suggested a supplement of formula... So at night he gets one supplement..

I was trying to get myself into somewhat of a routine with BFing since I always feel Im forcing my breast down my sons throat..

So I started feeding 2 supplements a day..and at least 8 BFing's or bottle of BM a day (like every 2 hrs.)

My son sleeps all day and rarely wakes to eat so Im always trying to wake him up (however at night he wakes every 2 hrs on the nose...go figure)

We went to the DR thursday and he's only gained like an ounce (I know gaining is gaining) in my heart I just feel he is not getting enough...

Ive started pumping alot more so I can SEE what he's getting...but I know pumping will shorten my supply..

He prefers one breast over the other..and falls asleep during feedings..sometimes he only eat for 5 min. on each (or even 5 min on only one)

At first I figured...maybe hes just full...but then today after he ate..I put a bottle of BM in his mouth and he drank it (2 oz.) Obviously he was STILL hungry..

Im driving myself crazy thinking Im starving him...and thats the reason he sleeps so much!!!

I really dont think that im not producing enough...because Im always leaking (ALOT) all over the place...

I dont wanna give it up..but maybe make his primary feedings formula.. and only BF twice a day..

PLease someone give me some advice!!!

Ive heard if your baby was hungry he'd let you know a thousand times... and thats not always true...

I need step by step direction on what to do from here...


Also- the DR wasnt "worried" per say...but wants to see my son week by week...to make sure hes gaining... I feel like its all my fault

Re: Im having a real hard time BFing...

no no no!! don't switch from bm to formula, why would you do that?? pumping will NOT shorten your supply - I pumped my heart out and still had plenty when the baby wanted to nurse. Even if all your baby gets is pumped breastmilk, that's still better than formula!

Re: Im having a real hard time BFing...

I've mentioned this before but I prefer pumping breatmilk for my son better than nursing because I was a worrywart from the beginning (he became jaundice in the hospital and had to stay an extra 2 days under lights --it was so hard for me leaving him and I blamed myself since I wasn't producing much of anything in the hospital)and wanted to know EXACTLY how much bm he was getting. So while Luke was in the hospital (I would go in for his feedings and would give him formula and my breast to keep them stimulated) I bought the medela electic pump and started pumping away. At first I would hardly get anything, but I kept at it every 3 hours (in the beginning I would alternate feedings of formula and expressed bm) and now two months later I pump every 4 hours and produce 5-8oz every pumping (I pump both breasts at the same time--it is suppose to make you produce more more). I give him 1 bottle of formula right before bed (I now produce enough so alternate formula/bm feedings aren't needed) and have been able to freeze plenty. Every now and then I also nurse (its very rare) and Luke doesn't have a problem switching between all three--expressed bm, formula, and actual breast.

Best of luck--- I often think that as new mommies we blame ourselves too easily when it comes to our newborns. Just the fact that you are so concerned shows what a great mom you are!

If you have any questions of need a shoulder fm me!

Re: Im having a real hard time BFing...

Pumping won't decrease your supply. My LC has me pumping like crazy trying to trick my body into making more milk. Personally if I could breastfeed I wouldn't switch to formula I would keep trying at breastfeeding and instead of giving formula I would give my pumped breast milk. Have you thought about seeing a lactation consultant? I have been going to one and it's been so helpful. It may not solve my problem but its nice to have the support.

Re: Im having a real hard time BFing...

Princessmaris,

Sent ya FM!

Re: Im having a real hard time BFing...

Another way to know what he is getting is to weigh him immediately before and immediately after a feeding on a baby scale. Maybe the doctor's office will let you come in to do this.

Sounds like there may be a latch issue. Get a referral to a really good lactation consultant. She will come to your house and make you feel much better.

(I'm in Massachusetts, so I can't give a recommendation...)

Re: Im having a real hard time BFing...

The best way to know is to count the diapers. My twin brought her DD home - and tried breastfeeding. Her gut feeling was that something was wrong because the baby kept screaming - and then slept for about 6 hours straight. When she called her pediatrician, he made her come straight in - turns out Samantha wasn't latching on properly and had become lethargic because she was starving.

Suzanne (twin) had a lactation consultant and went on to feed Samantha to the ripe old age of 2-1/2 years old (yes, yes I know -very controversial).

Trust your instincts and COUNT the diapers! While it's the most natural thing, it doesn't come naturally to most women. You'll get it - just keep trying. Good book is the Baby Whisperer - I found that I was over feeding my son.
BEST OF LUCK!

Re: Im having a real hard time BFing...

i do count the diapers...and he has the "recommended" amount per day...but as I said before...he dosent feed very long ( sometimes only 5 min.) and sleeps ALOT... if i offer him a bottle after BFing he takes it...and drinks the whole thing...

I feel im not truely enjoying him...because im so worried..

I dont have a baby scale...but have gotten on the scale with him in my arms n compared it to my weight w/o him... however...its not alwats accurate depending on where it is on the floor....

Re: Im having a real hard time BFing...

I felt the same way when I started BFing. I was always worried about his weight gain. We found a baby scale at Babies R Us - it's only $35 and while it may not be as accurate as the doctor's scale, it should be very close. It might help you not to worry so much.

If you intend on BFing, the more formula you give the baby the harder time you will have. You have to keep your body on a schedule, and feed on demand (which will increase your supply). If your baby will take a bottle after BF, maybe you should just try more BFing instead of the bottle. If the baby is hungry, he will eat. If there is a problem with your latch, an LC can help (and can also tell you if there is a problem with production).

Hang in there - you are doing a good thing.

Re: Im having a real hard time BFing...

when I was BFing one mistake I found out I was making was nursing a "i'm tired" cry that I thought was an "I'm hungry" cry. I felt like I was nursing every 2 hours and he would fall right asleep. Once I was able to figure out the 2 cries, thnigs got better.

Re: Im having a real hard time BFing...

You need to relax, honestly because stress will not help your milk production or your ability to have a timely let down that will keep your son interested in BF, especially if you are supplementing with a bottle. It's not even about BF vs FF, it's about the ease of getting what he wants when he wants it.

There is no set time that will be the same from person to person or feeding to feeding. My daughter nursed at most 7-10 minutes on one side and was full (She was a good nurser, I had a huge supply, and strong letdown.) Although she was up during the day to eat, she slept mostly through the night from the very beginning and I never woke her. At first she lost more weight than typical, but she did end up gaining it back. When you gave him the bottle, were you more relaxed and talking to him more which could have kept him more awake? Typically a baby BF is more apt to be relaxed from body contact and wanting to sleep more.

Try to remember that every baby has a different agenda to gain weight. That's why the Dr's go by the % charts because babies find their curve and usually stick to it for the most part. Until you have that curve established, you Dr is just being cautious and not trying to make you feel like a failure.

I would say that if he's definitely doing his recommended amount of soiled diapers, he's getting enough milk.

It does sound like he has his nights and days mixed up and there is info on how to go about how to adjust him. Once you do this, it may be a slight sense of relief.

Otherwise, sounds like the other girls gave some great ideas/advice.

Re: Im having a real hard time BFing...