LIFamilies.com - Long Island, NY


RSS
Articles Business Directory Blog Real Estate Community Forum Shop My Family Contests

Log In Chat Index Search Rules Lingo Create Account

Quick navigation:   

Need advice (pros and cons) job related and real estate help needed

Posted By Message

FRAPPALICIOUS
sexxxxxy

Member since 10/05

2236 total posts

Name:
Me

Need advice (pros and cons) job related and real estate help needed

Sorry this is soo long!

As many of you know, DH and I moved to Florida 6 months ago. I took a $10,000 pay cut since the pay down here isn't comparable with NY salary, but we are doing fine with the cost of living.

A little background. Ive been working in law firms for 13 years as a legal assistant. I HATE where I am working now. Well, it's ok, but I cannot stand one of my bosses. She is a total witch and makes me miserable. Being that I am not familiar with Florida law, this hasn't been the easiest transition, but I am managing. While I do not like my job, I love the people, and I can't see going to another law firm because 1) I don't want to start over at a new place right now and 2) there will be crappy bosses everywhere.

The other attorney I work for I LOVE LOVE LOVE and she is wonderful to work for.... but...........

She is 6 months pregnant and will be out on maternity leave from September/October to January.

Here's my dilemma....
She approached me today asking if I would want to watch her baby when she comes back to work. To me, this is a dream job, because I used to work in a day care center and it was the best job I have ever had. I love love love kids and would LOVE to do this for her. But, doing this would mean quitting my job in January and working solely for her. This isn't an issue for me, but I need to factor two things into the mix:

1. I will no longer have medical benefits working for her. I would have to go on DH's plan, but I think he would have to pay close to $400.00 a month to add me, if not more). I know that eventually we were going to be on one plan anyways (when we start a family, but for now we have our own plans because it's cheaper).

2. She is going to pay me off the books. The amount she offered to me is $125 less than what I take home a week, so I would actually have to tell her that, while I would love to do this, I cannot do it for that amount and if she really wants me to do it, I would need at least another $50-100 more per week than what she offered. I think she would do it, because I know she is freaking out about having a stranger watch her baby, but I'm not 100% sure she will pay me that much.

DH and I have talked about it, and his concern is, when we go to look for a house, if I am working off the books, will a mortgage company ONLY look at DH's salary? If this is something that's going to bite us in the butt down the road when we are looking to buy a house, I might just have to keep the regular full time job, but if this is something that can be worked through with a mortgage company, I really want to consider it.

I don't know what to do Chat Icon Chat Icon

Does anyone have any advice about working off the books (pros and cons) that they can offer to me?

Posted 7/11/06 7:57 PM
 
Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource

SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!

Member since 3/06

32345 total posts

Name:

Re: Need advice (pros and cons) job related and real estate help needed

I don't have experience working off the books (since I was a teenager) but I understand your dilemma.

I would personally not take that job. here's why:

1. no health coverage
2. not much flexibility, your eyes would need to be glued on that baby alllllllllll day. no going our for lunch or running errands, etc. and what if you're sick? then what happens? do you watch the baby while sick?
3. what about vacation time
4. since you would be paid off the books, like you said, you might get turned down for a mortgage since they would only go by your hubby's salary

good luck in whatever you decide!! this can't be an easy decision!!!!!

Posted 7/11/06 8:04 PM
 

Lucky09
2017!

Member since 1/06

7537 total posts

Name:
DW

Re: Need advice (pros and cons) job related and real estate help needed

I am not sure about your mortgage question but wanted to say congratulations on your job offer!!! Chat Icon

My first instinct though is that the mortgage lender will take into account your "off the books job" but I think that maintaining steady employment at your current job would be the better option.

I just moved also (upstate), bought a house and transferred within the same company because I had concerns about the mortgage.

Good luck!!!!!!! Chat Icon

Posted 7/11/06 8:05 PM
 

Beth
The Key to your new home....

Member since 2/06

24849 total posts

Name:
Beth

Re: Need advice (pros and cons) job related and real estate help needed

I can answer the mortgage question

you can do a no document, no stated income loan if you credit score is good

but I don't think you should do this

Posted 7/11/06 8:11 PM
 

nov04libride
big brother <3

Member since 5/05

14672 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: Need advice (pros and cons) job related and real estate help needed

I can tell you that I was approved on my salary alone for a mortgage amount nearly 7x what I am making. They approve you for a LOT. I wouldn't worry about that, but I also wouldn't take the job.

Would it be minding the baby in her home? I would worry it might morph into "can you just clean the floor and vacuum if she is taking a nap" or "while taking her to the dr. pick up the dry cleaning..." i guess reading the nanny diaries has scared me...

eta: my uncle runs a large law firm in clearwater. where are you?

Message edited 7/11/2006 8:12:45 PM.

Posted 7/11/06 8:12 PM
 

FRAPPALICIOUS
sexxxxxy

Member since 10/05

2236 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: Need advice (pros and cons) job related and real estate help needed

Posted by nov04libride

I can tell you that I was approved on my salary alone for a mortgage amount nearly 7x what I am making. They approve you for a LOT. I wouldn't worry about that, but I also wouldn't take the job.

Would it be minding the baby in her home? I would worry it might morph into "can you just clean the floor and vacuum if she is taking a nap" or "while taking her to the dr. pick up the dry cleaning..." i guess reading the nanny diaries has scared me...

eta: my uncle runs a large law firm in clearwater. where are you?



I didn't even think of that (the housework crap) and, I could totally see her doing that too Chat Icon
It also dawned on me that I wouldn't have a 401(k) program either. Alot of things I need to consider.

We live outside of Orlando (2 hours from Clearwater, I think) Chat Icon

Posted 7/11/06 8:15 PM
 

FRAPPALICIOUS
sexxxxxy

Member since 10/05

2236 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: Need advice (pros and cons) job related and real estate help needed

bump... to see if anyone can shed some light Chat Icon

Posted 7/12/06 7:08 AM
 

MrsPorkChop
Twinning!!

Member since 5/05

9941 total posts

Name:
Missy

Re: Need advice (pros and cons) job related and real estate help needed

after reading your post i feel you should stay with your secure job.

-no medical so losing $400 a month from hubbys plan in addition losing more $ from salary

-no "security" as in this job could end in a flash if she moves or if she/her family decides its not working out

however this is my take and im only saying because you asked.

good luck with your decision!


eta- also if you wanted to get back into the law thing, there will be a huge gap in your work experienc which doesnt look the greatest on a resume

Message edited 7/12/2006 8:54:23 AM.

Posted 7/12/06 8:52 AM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

Name:

Re: Need advice (pros and cons) job related and real estate help needed

Posted by preshy7

after reading your post i feel you should stay with your secure job.

-no medical so losing $400 a month from hubbys plan in addition losing more $ from salary

-no "security" as in this job could end in a flash if she moves or if she/her family decides its not working out

however this is my take and im only saying because you asked.

good luck with your decision!


eta- also if you wanted to get back into the law thing, there will be a huge gap in your work experienc which doesnt look the greatest on a resume



I agree - I wouldn't do it either.

If you do decide to do it, make sure you spell out the terms of your employment, sick time, vacation time, hours, overtime. Do you get to take the baby out? While you may get along with her right now, I can tell you that mothers (particularly new ones) are extrememly tough on their caregivers. No one would take care of her child like its own mother would. You could have a falling out over something as simple as a severe diaper rash.

Posted 7/12/06 9:16 AM
 

MrsPorkChop
Twinning!!

Member since 5/05

9941 total posts

Name:
Missy

Re: Need advice (pros and cons) job related and real estate help needed

Posted by nrthshgrl

Posted by preshy7

after reading your post i feel you should stay with your secure job.

-no medical so losing $400 a month from hubbys plan in addition losing more $ from salary

-no "security" as in this job could end in a flash if she moves or if she/her family decides its not working out

however this is my take and im only saying because you asked.

good luck with your decision!


eta- also if you wanted to get back into the law thing, there will be a huge gap in your work experienc which doesnt look the greatest on a resume



I agree - I wouldn't do it either.

If you do decide to do it, make sure you spell out the terms of your employment, sick time, vacation time, hours, overtime. Do you get to take the baby out? While you may get along with her right now, I can tell you that mothers (particularly new ones) are extrememly tough on their caregivers. No one would take care of her child like its own mother would. You could have a falling out over something as simple as a severe diaper rash.




i was trying to state nrthshgrl is much more eloquent in her words- the whole falling out thing is what i would be afraid of the most...then stuck losing a job with a big employment gap

Posted 7/12/06 9:46 AM
 

Little-J-Mommy
I'm a Big Brother

Member since 5/06

8041 total posts

Name:
D

Re: Need advice (pros and cons) job related and real estate help needed

I think what bothered me most about the whole offer is that your boss expects you to quit full-time benefits/401k etc, all for a PAY-CUT to work exclusively for her. For that reason and all of the above, I wouldn't do it. Good luck!

Posted 7/12/06 10:13 AM
 
 

Potentially Related Topics:

Topic Posted By Started Replies Forum
Job related advice needed Irishlass 8/31/05 6 Families Helping Families ™
Opinions (advice needed) PLEASE..job related dm24angel 5/17/05 32 Families Helping Families ™
Xpost: Advice needed-bringing baby on a cruise NJmom 8/23/06 2 Travel & Vacations
Advice needed-bringing baby on a cruise NJmom 8/23/06 5 Parenting
Teachers what subject is the easiest to find a job for? NoStressMom 8/23/06 11 Families Helping Families ™
Any advice for taking a road trip w/ baby? AndreaLMT 8/23/06 2 Parenting
 
Quick navigation:   
Currently 428298 users on the LIFamilies.com Chat
New Businesses
1 More Rep
Carleton Hall of East Islip
J&A Building Services
LaraMae Health Coaching
Sonic Wellness
Julbaby Photography LLC
Ideal Uniforms
Teresa Geraghty Photography
Camelot Dream Homes
Long Island Wedding Boutique
MB Febus- Rodan & Fields
Camp Harbor
Market America-Shop.com
ACM Basement Waterproofing
Travel Tom

      Follow LIWeddings on Facebook

      Follow LIFamilies on Twitter
Long Island Bridal Shows