Interesting article in this month's Parenting magazine (April 2006)

They had a half page article on how to answer obnoxious adoption questions. They said that while people may not mean to be rude or malicious, the questions or comments can be. They suggest these brief and effective answers to questions or comments that seem especially out of line.

Q: Is that your real child?
A: Yes, I'm a real parent raising a real child.

Q: How much did he/she cost?
A: It's always expensive to be a parent, isn't it?

Q: What a shame you can't have kids of your own.
A: I'm so grateful that life made this child mine.
I also like how Angelina Jolie has said in interviews that there is no greater love than by 2 people who chose each other, like she and her first 2 children did.

Q: Your kids look so different. Which one is yours?
A: They're siblings and they are both my kids.

Q: Are your kids from another country?
A: We're a family, so we live together.

Q: She/He's so lucky to have been adopted.
A: We're the fortunate ones to be his/her parents.

Re: Interesting article in this month's Parenting magazine (April 2006)

Thanks for posting these. I love the first one. I've already heard the "real" thing so many times it's nauseating. I can only imagine how much more I'll be hearing this type of BS for the rest of my life. I laugh at these questions though. I know not to take them personally. But knowing how to answer them in front of your children is a whole other story, so this is great. Thanks again!

Re: Interesting article in this month's Parenting magazine (April 2006)

The hardest thing for me during this process is when people tell me "how generous" I am being or "how lucky that baby is going to be"..I always respond with "Actually we are the lucky ones. I am not a missionary. I am just being a mother".

I know that sometimes comments/questions come from the heart..not to malice but also sometimes people should think before they say stuff.

Re: Interesting article in this month's Parenting magazine (April 2006)

I'm so glad they posted that article. I've had people say to me, now that I'm adult "So your sister is their real child"

Haha..Yup..I'm just a robot!

Re: Interesting article in this month's Parenting magazine (April 2006)