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Things a Hallmark Card Cannot Say

Posted By Message

Emily
Kasey & Me! Lurves it!

Member since 7/06

8703 total posts

Name:
STBHC

Things a Hallmark Card Cannot Say

THINGS THAT HALLMARK CARDS DON'T SAY




My tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat

When I looked at the tire...

I noticed your cat.

Sorry!




~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Heard your wife left you,
How upset you must be.

But don't fret about it...

She moved in with me.





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Looking back over the years
that we've been together,

I can't help but wonder...

"What the heck was I thinking?"





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Congratulations on your wedding day!
Too bad no one likes your husband.

! ;~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



How could two people as beautiful as you
Have such an ugly baby?





~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



I've always wanted to have
someone to hold,
someone to love.

After having met you ..

I've changed my mind.

-------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------



I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.
I never believed in Hell until I met you.





//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...
That you're not here to ruin it for me.





####################################################

Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go...

Would you like to take this knife out of my back?

You'll probably need it again.

********************************************************************************



Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!

(Available only in Tennessee, Kentucky & West Virginia)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Happy birthday! You look great for your age.

Almost Lifelike!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



When we were together,
you always said you'd die for me.

Now that we've broken up,

I think it's time you kept your promise.





//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////



We have been friends for a very long time ..
let's say we stop?





+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++



I'm so miserable without you
it's almost like you're here.





=====================================================



Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.

Did you ever find out who the father was?





%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%



Your friends and I wanted to do
something special for your birthday.

So we're having you put to sleep.


))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))



So your daughter's a hooker,
and it spoiled your day.

Look at the bright side,

it's really good pay.



Message edited 8/24/2006 12:23:58 PM.

Posted 8/24/06 12:19 PM
 
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mommy2bella
Where does time go?

Member since 12/05

9747 total posts

Name:
Kelly

Re: Things a Hallmark cards don't say

PIMPChat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 8/24/06 12:19 PM
 

Cookiegobbler
My little love bugs!!

Member since 9/05

5759 total posts

Name:
Nicole

Re: Things a Hallmark cards don't say

HAHAHAHAHA!

Posted 8/24/06 12:21 PM
 

Moehick
Ready for the sun!

Member since 5/05

30339 total posts

Name:
Properly perfect™

Re: Things a Hallmark cards don't say

AwesomeChat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Some of those cards would be needed tooChat Icon

Posted 8/24/06 12:21 PM
 

Jax430
Hi!

Member since 5/05

18919 total posts

Name:
Jackie

Re: Things a Hallmark cards don't say

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 8/24/06 12:23 PM
 

Phyl
R.I.P. Sweet Mia ♥

Member since 5/06

28918 total posts

Name:
The Mystical Azzhorse! ™

Re: Things a Hallmark cards don't say

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I'm going to send this to my DD and she can make some of these up at work! (hallmark)Chat Icon

Posted 8/24/06 12:24 PM
 

Emily
Kasey & Me! Lurves it!

Member since 7/06

8703 total posts

Name:
STBHC

Re: Things a Hallmark Card Cannot Say

Posted by atracinact

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I'm going to send this to my DD and she can make some of these up at work! (hallmark)Chat Icon




Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 8/24/06 12:25 PM
 

Jenziba
?

Member since 5/05

6265 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: Things a Hallmark Card Cannot Say

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Posted 8/24/06 12:35 PM
 

Stacey1403
Where it all began....

Member since 5/05

24065 total posts

Name:

Re: Things a Hallmark Card Cannot Say

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Posted 8/24/06 12:38 PM
 

J9-13
We're gonna be big sisters!

Member since 6/06

14887 total posts

Name:
J9

Re: Things a Hallmark Card Cannot Say

That reminds me of what Adam Sandler would say in Mr. Deeds! LOL. His dream was to write greeting cards Chat Icon

Posted 8/24/06 12:56 PM
 

MABLE03
I <3 SATC

Member since 6/06

4563 total posts

Name:
Fabulous

Re: Things a Hallmark Card Cannot Say

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Posted 8/24/06 12:58 PM
 

Heather617
My Babies

Member since 5/05

2566 total posts

Name:
Heather

Re: Things a Hallmark Card Cannot Say

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Posted 8/24/06 1:54 PM
 

MsMBV
:P

Member since 5/05

28602 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: Things a Hallmark Card Cannot Say

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Posted 8/24/06 2:23 PM
 

Maathy317
Grammie's Little Man

Member since 2/06

3235 total posts

Name:
D

Re: Things a Hallmark Card Cannot Say

Very funneee!!Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 8/24/06 3:06 PM
 

evnme
My little lamb

Member since 8/05

12633 total posts

Name:
aka momma2b

Re: Things a Hallmark Card Cannot Say

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Posted 8/24/06 8:15 PM
 

lvdolphins
My Loves!

Member since 5/05

46292 total posts

Name:

Re: Things a Hallmark Card Cannot Say

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Posted 8/24/06 8:59 PM
 

JoCaCoLa
Brothers For Life

Member since 5/05

1536 total posts

Name:

Re: Things a Hallmark Card Cannot Say

Absolutely hilarious!!Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 8/24/06 9:00 PM
 
 

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