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Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

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Marcie
Complete Happiness :)

Member since 5/05

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LOVE being a Mommy!

Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

Some people in my life, put me in a position sometimes that they really don't understand that they make me feel horrible.

Here is my situation. I am 4 1/2 months pregnant. Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, DH and I are spending with my family. It is only supposed to be me, DH, my mother, father, brother, my aunt and her son and daughter.

Well, I get a phone call yesterday saying that my cousin's girlfriend was just diagnosed with mono. Well, my cousin went to the doctor to get his blood test done, but the doctor doesn't believe that he has it. But says sometimes it takes a couple of days (up to 10 days) to actually show up in a blood test.

Now let me ask you a question - if you were in my aunts position about coming over for the holidays, would you go and spend the holidays with everyone or stay home.
Or should I be the one that stays home?

Posted 12/22/05 2:25 PM
 
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missus-hbradio
Twin mommy

Member since 5/05

15857 total posts

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Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

I dont know too much about mono but I think SHE should be the one to stay home. Especially since you are pregnant. To me thats just common sense but who knows how other people think.

Posted 12/22/05 2:27 PM
 

PrincessP
Big sister!!!!!!!!!!

Member since 12/05

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Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

I think u should be involved with your family and maybe your aunt, her daughter and son stay together. Its not like a punishment to anyone but of course u should not be exposed to mono nor should u have to stay home for being pregnant. I would personally split the families up for this one specific circumstance. I would hope everyone understands.

Posted 12/22/05 2:50 PM
 

dpli
Daylight savings :)

Member since 5/05

13973 total posts

Name:
D

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

I think the cousin should stay home and if the family doesn't want to leave him alone, then thye should stay home too. Unfortunately, people seem to do whatever they want to sometimes, without considering other people. If they insist on coming over anyway, I would stay home. I wouldn't take a chance if I were pregnant, just because they are inconsiderate. Chat Icon

Posted 12/22/05 2:56 PM
 

mskimmy98
My twins are one!!!

Member since 5/05

2540 total posts

Name:
Kimberly

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

Oh no.. they should stay home... They may or may not have Mono.. Well then the considerate thing for them to do is STAY HOME (especially since you are PG)!!!!!!!!!


Posted 12/22/05 2:59 PM
 

LadyMaravilla
Fall Is Here

Member since 5/05

12023 total posts

Name:
Sonia

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

Posted by mskimmy98

Oh no.. they should stay home... They may or may not have Mono.. Well then the considerate thing for them to do is STAY HOME (especially since you are PG)!!!!!!!!!





I agree. They should be the ones that stay home & not you.

Posted 12/22/05 3:02 PM
 

Redhead
You Live, You Learn

Member since 5/05

31871 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

THEY DEFINTIELY SHOULD STAY HOME! Chat Icon

Posted 12/22/05 3:03 PM
 

Moehick
Ready for the sun!

Member since 5/05

30339 total posts

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Properly perfect™

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

Whoever is sick should stay home....so definitely your cousin shouldChat Icon

Posted 12/22/05 3:09 PM
 

FelAndJon
needs to update her avatar pic

Member since 6/05

10212 total posts

Name:
Felice (aka LuckyBride2004)

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

I don't celebrate Christmas so this might come off wrong. Instead of risking getting you sick, maybe both families can get together after he gets back the results? For Christmas eve, maybe just do the individual family thing? This is of course assuming they know you are pregnant? You should not have to stay home becuase of this! Also, your cousin and his GF could get EVERYONE sick, not only you!

Posted 12/22/05 3:13 PM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

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Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

They should stay home if they are contagious and could give it to other guests - but especially so because you are pregnant.

Posted 12/22/05 3:28 PM
 

Diane
Hope is Contagious....catch it

Member since 5/05

30683 total posts

Name:
D

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

Posted by missus-hbradio

I dont know too much about mono but I think SHE should be the one to stay home. Especially since you are pregnant. To me thats just common sense but who knows how other people think.



I agree

Posted 12/22/05 6:02 PM
 

MrsERod
Praying for Everyone.

Member since 5/05

26170 total posts

Name:
MrsERod™®

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

Posted by Moehick

Whoever is sick should stay home....so definitely your cousin shouldChat Icon




i agree. Chat Icon

Posted 12/22/05 6:04 PM
 

Marcie
Complete Happiness :)

Member since 5/05

27789 total posts

Name:
LOVE being a Mommy!

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

See that is exactly how I feel.

I just can't believe that she is not saying it - she wants us to make the decision.
Why, so I can feel horrible about it?
I know she is going through a hard time - going through a nasty divorce - but come on, we should not have to make the decision for her. She feels if the doctor says that he doesn't have it - that it is still not in his system. He still was exposed to it - he may not get it - and be a carrier.

Posted 12/22/05 6:06 PM
 

skew
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

6794 total posts

Name:

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

of course they should stay home.

exactly why is the decision left up to you? it's not as if you are going to be the only one there celebrating christmas. it is so unfair to put you in that position.

i would take the high road and tell them that it's not just yourself that you are worried about and there is no need to risk infecting anyone else (mom, dad, dh and your brother).

BTW - how old is your cousin?

ETA: i just read your reply. i would tell your mother or father (whoever's sister it is) to tell her that they are so upset to hear that the x (son's name) has/could have mono and everyone is very disappointed that she and x will not be able to attend the holidays w/ the family and that they will be greatly missed.

if your aunt presses and says "well we could attend but i don't know what to do", they could always follow up w/ "i think it would be best if we plan to celebrate together when X is feeling better"

Message edited 12/22/2005 6:36:19 PM.

Posted 12/22/05 6:21 PM
 

sophie78
LIF Infant

Member since 5/05

220 total posts

Name:
.

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

If he doesn't have any symptoms and you don't kiss him, I don't think you will catch it.

Posted 12/22/05 7:13 PM
 

JE7391
LIF Toddler

Member since 11/05

463 total posts

Name:

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

i'd be afraid to risk it and if she didn't stay home... yea, I would.

Posted 12/22/05 7:15 PM
 

JE7391
LIF Toddler

Member since 11/05

463 total posts

Name:

...

Message edited 11/29/2007 4:24:05 PM.

Posted 12/22/05 7:16 PM
 

pinky
Twin Moms Do Everything Twice

Member since 5/05

9612 total posts

Name:

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

omg they should definitely stay home!

Posted 12/22/05 7:31 PM
 

Marcie
Complete Happiness :)

Member since 5/05

27789 total posts

Name:
LOVE being a Mommy!

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

Posted by skew

of course they should stay home.

exactly why is the decision left up to you? it's not as if you are going to be the only one there celebrating christmas. it is so unfair to put you in that position.

i would take the high road and tell them that it's not just yourself that you are worried about and there is no need to risk infecting anyone else (mom, dad, dh and your brother).

BTW - how old is your cousin?

ETA: i just read your reply. i would tell your mother or father (whoever's sister it is) to tell her that they are so upset to hear that the x (son's name) has/could have mono and everyone is very disappointed that she and x will not be able to attend the holidays w/ the family and that they will be greatly missed.

if your aunt presses and says "well we could attend but i don't know what to do", they could always follow up w/ "i think it would be best if we plan to celebrate together when X is feeling better"




Well, that is what I said to my mother - she should tell us to make the decision, she should be saying, that there is a slight possibility that he has it, so just being on the safe side, we are going to stay home. My mother and I should not be the ones that say - oh no, stay home.Chat Icon

Posted 12/22/05 10:11 PM
 

-Laurie-
Hi!

Member since 5/05

2536 total posts

Name:

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

I think as long as you don't kiss them and they use plasticware that can be thrown out I don't foresee a huge problem if they are testing negative and don't have any tiredness or enlarged spleen.
I had mono. No one in my house got it nor did my boyfriend. My doc thinks I got it in Disney World:(
I had seperate disposable everything.
Good Luck and sorry your dealing with this.

Posted 12/22/05 10:25 PM
 

Shelly
She's 7!!!

Member since 8/05

14624 total posts

Name:

Re: Why do people make me feel bad? LONG VENT!

I think if she's sick and he has been exposed- they should stay home, regardless of whether you are pregnant. If he does have it- he can get everyone else sick. THat's just not fair.

Posted 12/23/05 10:13 AM
 
 

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