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05mommy09
Family of 5!
Member since 5/05 15364 total posts
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<3 Mommy <3
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A little bit of a pickle
OK- To make a long story short-
DH and I had this group of friends... after having RJ- they'd invite us out (mind you this is like the week after I had the baby) and we were never able to go ( I didnt want to leave the baby yet- or I just didnt feel up to it) Needless to say- they disappeared-
We havent seen our heard from then since RJ's christening when he was 8 weeks old....
Well- we got an invite (all 3 of us) to some BBQ bash one of the guys is throwing himself from grad. college....
We are on the fence about going.... Is he only inviting us because- he put so much into all our affairs the past year (wedding, e-party, christening, etc...) Is he trying to make a menz...???
He hasnt tried to contact us in over 5 months, and the whole group of people who ditched us will be there-
go or not go and send a gift....???
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Posted 4/29/06 11:40 PM  |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
I say go.
Bring a small gift and feel it out
Once you get there if you feel that your friendships have in fact died with them then I would leave by saying the baby is fussy (or something to that effect).
n my opinion, this way you give the benefit of the doubt but by the end of the day you will really know where you friendships stands.
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| Posted 4/29/06 11:44 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
If it were me, I would go.
I don't know anyone who really thinks about "getting back" money that they gave out to their friends. I would assume I was invited because they wanted to see me - esp. after not seeing me for months.
Also I think that when friends are at different stages in their lives, there is a lull until they all catch up.
I rarely see my friends & don't call them too often - but it's because we all have something going on in our lives. It doesn't make me think of them as less of a friend.
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| Posted 4/29/06 11:46 PM |
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JodiBabe
Married for 9 yrs!!!!!!
Member since 5/05 6672 total posts
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Jodi
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
Posted by DebG
I say go.
Bring a small gift and feel it out
Once you get there if you feel that your friendships have in fact died with them then I would leave by saying the baby is fussy (or something to that effect).
n my opinion, this way you give the benefit of the doubt but by the end of the day you will really know where you friendships stands.
I tend to agree with this.
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| Posted 4/29/06 11:48 PM |
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05mommy09
Family of 5!
Member since 5/05 15364 total posts
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<3 Mommy <3
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
Its not even so much about the guy whose party it is- rather than the other that will be there...
I could go into full detail if you want- but they way it ended was pretty messed up on there part- and to be honest- Im so glad we are no longer in contact with them.... (Again- not SO much the guy himself- although its just as messed up to follow those jerks) but rather the others
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| Posted 4/29/06 11:50 PM |
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Stefanie
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Stefanie
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
I would go too. I don't know what it is, but when you're the only one who has kids...people tend to veer away from you....it's happened to me...
Maybe they're trying to make up and include you because they feel bad that they lost your friendship.
Go and have fun!!!
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| Posted 4/29/06 11:51 PM |
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DebG
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Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
Posted by Princessmaris
Its not even so much about the guy whose party it is- rather than the other that will be there...
I could go into full detail if you want- but they way it ended was pretty messed up on there part- and to be honest- Im so glad we are no longer in contact with them.... (Again- not SO much the guy himself- although its just as messed up to follow those jerks) but rather the others
Humn....do your other friends tend to be late? If so, maybe come early for just an hour and then leave saying you have a prior obligation? That way you can still show support for the person that is graduating but don't really have to deal with the others.
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| Posted 4/29/06 11:51 PM |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
Posted by Stefanie
I would go too. I don't know what it is, but when you're the only one who has kids...people tend to veer away from you....it's happened to me...
Maybe they're trying to make up and include you because they feel bad that they lost your friendship.
Go and have fun!!!
mini hijack
Who the hell could veer away from that cutie?
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| Posted 4/29/06 11:52 PM |
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Tany
Becoming a different woman
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Tania
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
Posted by Stefanie
I would go too. I don't know what it is, but when you're the only one who has kids...people tend to veer away from you....it's happened to me...
Maybe they're trying to make up and include you because they feel bad that they lost your friendship.
Go and have fun!!!
so true, life changes so much but your true friends will always be there for you no matter what.
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| Posted 4/29/06 11:55 PM |
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Stefanie
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Stefanie
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
Posted by DebG
Posted by Stefanie
I would go too. I don't know what it is, but when you're the only one who has kids...people tend to veer away from you....it's happened to me...
Maybe they're trying to make up and include you because they feel bad that they lost your friendship.
Go and have fun!!!
mini hijack
Who the hell could veer away from that cutie?
 I know...right???
One friend that I had told me that having a baby does nothing for her...we don't hang out anymore....
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| Posted 4/29/06 11:55 PM |
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05mommy09
Family of 5!
Member since 5/05 15364 total posts
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<3 Mommy <3
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
Well- no matter what we'll be late since DH has work....
I just dont want these people to think what they did was ok....Like you could act they way they did- and yet we are stupid shmucks and at the 1st invite we get- we going running back...
I see everyones point of view... and Stef- I completly understand... being that very few of our friends have kids....
Again though- one of the girls I was very close with (she was the one who brought me to my shower and everything) and this whole thing was her doing, and things she did was wrong.... I have no desire to even have a conversation with her....When I was down... she just continued to kick...
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| Posted 4/29/06 11:56 PM |
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DebG
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Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
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The cure IS worse!
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
Posted by Princessmaris
Well- no matter what we'll be late since DH has work....
I just dont want these people to think what they did was ok....Like you could act they way they did- and yet we are stupid shmucks and at the 1st invite we get- we going running back...
I see everyones point of view... and Stef- I completly understand... being that very few of our friends have kids....
Again though- one of the girls I was very close with (she was the one who brought me to my shower and everything) and this whole thing was her doing, and things she did was wrong.... I have no desire to even have a conversation with her....When I was down... she just continued to kick...
I certainly wouldn't go then.
Invite the friend whos graduating over for dinnre one night to celebrate then.
No need to put yourself in a situation where you are uncomfortable.
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| Posted 4/29/06 11:57 PM |
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05mommy09
Family of 5!
Member since 5/05 15364 total posts
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
Decisions, decisions!
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| Posted 4/29/06 11:59 PM |
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MrsPornStar
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
Posted by DebG
Posted by Princessmaris
Well- no matter what we'll be late since DH has work....
I just dont want these people to think what they did was ok....Like you could act they way they did- and yet we are stupid shmucks and at the 1st invite we get- we going running back...
I see everyones point of view... and Stef- I completly understand... being that very few of our friends have kids....
Again though- one of the girls I was very close with (she was the one who brought me to my shower and everything) and this whole thing was her doing, and things she did was wrong.... I have no desire to even have a conversation with her....When I was down... she just continued to kick...
I certainly wouldn't go then.
Invite the friend whos graduating over for dinnre one night to celebrate then.
No need to put yourself in a situation where you are uncomfortable.
I completely agree. If you would like to spend some time with the person hosting the party, then try to make plans to see him without the group of friends.
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| Posted 4/30/06 12:22 AM |
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nancygrace
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Member since 9/05 6616 total posts
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
i owuldnt go...unless u want to mend a friendship again
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| Posted 4/30/06 12:25 AM |
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traceyd
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Member since 5/05 3644 total posts
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Tracey
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
I wouldn't go if the girl who is "poison" is going to be there. Sometimes you are better off not being friends with people like that. I lost a really good friend from college but in the end she was not there for me when I needed her and like you kept kicking me when I was down. You are better off without!
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| Posted 4/30/06 10:00 AM |
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QuoteTheRaven424
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Member since 5/05 13659 total posts
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And If That Isn't A True Blue Miracle
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
see, here's how I see it
i'd go, for the simple reason that, as you said, the person having the party isn't the main person you have an issue with.
By not going, you're telling the main group, and that girl that they got to you and they bother you.
I mean, I wouldn't go out of my way to talk to them, but I wouldn't send the message that they intimidate me enough to make me not go.
So, I'd go and if it got really uncomfortable, leave early.
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| Posted 4/30/06 3:30 PM |
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Shanti
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Re: A little bit of a pickle
I would go. If you feel uncomfortable while there, you can leave early.
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| Posted 4/30/06 5:27 PM |
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