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spinoff-bridesmaid issue

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christy
Mommy of 2

Member since 5/05

6787 total posts

Name:
Christy

spinoff-bridesmaid issue

I am a MOH planning a shower for my best friend. I sent an email to all the bridal party letting them know that the shower will be during a certain month. I then went with the mother of the bride (who is paying) and found the place and booked it for the month that I mentioned earlier. So I emailed the bridal party to save the date, and one of the girls emailed me that she travels a lot that month. She then suggested doing the shower months earlier (I assume for her convenience). All the other girls are fine with the date, except this one. Should I call the mother of the bride about possibly changing this date? I just wish this bridesmaid would have said this month was when she traveled weeks ago when I gave her the heads up.

PS-This is the same bridesmaid that wanted the bride to wait until 3 months before the wedding to order dresses incase she gets pregnant.

Message edited 2/20/2006 9:54:05 PM.

Posted 2/20/06 9:52 PM
 
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Redhead
You Live, You Learn

Member since 5/05

31871 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: spinoff-bridesmaid issue

I would call the mother of the bride to tell her about the traveling BM and to discuss it but NOT to necessarily change it...
I would also discuss it with the rest of the bridal party...

I wouldn't want the decision to go forward on me alone. I would want it discussed openly and honestly so that a group decision was made as to how to proceed

Posted 2/20/06 9:56 PM
 

christy
Mommy of 2

Member since 5/05

6787 total posts

Name:
Christy

Re: spinoff-bridesmaid issue

Thank you, I do planning on calling the mother of the bride tomorrow. I know she will not want to change the date though. This is a tough position.

Posted 2/20/06 10:04 PM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

Name:

Re: spinoff-bridesmaid issue

Posted by christy
This is a tough position.



And I agree with Red - not a position you should be in alone either.

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Posted 2/20/06 10:07 PM
 

05mommy09
Family of 5!

Member since 5/05

15364 total posts

Name:
<3 Mommy <3

Re: spinoff-bridesmaid issue

Posted by Redhead

I would call the mother of the bride to tell her about the traveling BM and to discuss it but NOT to necessarily change it...
I would also discuss it with the rest of the bridal party...

I wouldn't want the decision to go forward on me alone. I would want it discussed openly and honestly so that a group decision was made as to how to proceed



I couldnt agree more!

Posted 2/20/06 10:08 PM
 

Mrs-Boop
My Babies

Member since 5/05

4956 total posts

Name:
Jaime

Re: spinoff-bridesmaid issue

I would email the traveling BM and tell her this is why you informed the bm's a few weeks back, to see if anyone had a problem. Tell her since she didn't speak up, it was booked and now she knows for sure, not to plan a trip for that date. I wouldn't change the date for 1 bm, especially since they were informed of the possible month it would be in advance and didn't speak up til after the fact!!

Posted 2/20/06 10:14 PM
 

christy
Mommy of 2

Member since 5/05

6787 total posts

Name:
Christy

Re: spinoff-bridesmaid issue

Posted by Mrs-Boop

I would email the traveling BM and tell her this is why you informed the bm's a few weeks back, to see if anyone had a problem. Tell her since she didn't speak up, it was booked and now she knows for sure, not to plan a trip for that date. I wouldn't change the date for 1 bm, especially since they were informed of the possible month it would be in advance and didn't speak up til after the fact!!



See, that is my point. I tried to give a heads up, I would have suggested another week to the MOB. But now it is booked and I am frustrated that the bm never said anything weeks ago.

Posted 2/20/06 10:19 PM
 

Mrs-Boop
My Babies

Member since 5/05

4956 total posts

Name:
Jaime

Re: spinoff-bridesmaid issue

Posted by christy

Posted by Mrs-Boop

I would email the traveling BM and tell her this is why you informed the bm's a few weeks back, to see if anyone had a problem. Tell her since she didn't speak up, it was booked and now she knows for sure, not to plan a trip for that date. I wouldn't change the date for 1 bm, especially since they were informed of the possible month it would be in advance and didn't speak up til after the fact!!



See, that is my point. I tried to give a heads up, I would have suggested another week to the MOB. But now it is booked and I am frustrated that the bm never said anything weeks ago.



Well, she said she usually travels that month, didn't say she had a trip planned, so now she knows not to plan one. She has to choose whats more important to her. I wouldn't change it, its booked, your happy, moms happy and all the other bm's are happy, so its a done deal if ya ask me.

Posted 2/20/06 10:21 PM
 

Summer05
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

2320 total posts

Name:

Re: spinoff-bridesmaid issue

Posted by Redhead

I would call the mother of the bride to tell her about the traveling BM and to discuss it but NOT to necessarily change it...
I would also discuss it with the rest of the bridal party...

I wouldn't want the decision to go forward on me alone. I would want it discussed openly and honestly so that a group decision was made as to how to proceed



I agree!

Posted 2/20/06 10:23 PM
 

BaroqueMama
Chase is one!

Member since 5/05

27530 total posts

Name:
me

Re: spinoff-bridesmaid issue

Honestly, you gave the heads up on the month, and I'm sure that she had plenty of time before you booked the date to email you and tell you that month was no good for her. It's unfortunate that she won't be able to be there, but you have to accomodate the majority, not the minority. That's standard practice with everything.

Posted 2/20/06 10:25 PM
 

christy
Mommy of 2

Member since 5/05

6787 total posts

Name:
Christy

Re: spinoff-bridesmaid issue

Posted by prncssrachel

Honestly, you gave the heads up on the month, and I'm sure that she had plenty of time before you booked the date to email you and tell you that month was no good for her. It's unfortunate that she won't be able to be there, but you have to accomodate the majority, not the minority. That's standard practice with everything.



Thank you Rachel!

Posted 2/20/06 10:27 PM
 

Gertyrae
Peace out Homies!

Member since 5/05

20046 total posts

Name:
Gerty ®

Re: spinoff-bridesmaid issue

I think Red's advice was best. Talk to the other's and find out what everyone wants to do.

Posted 2/20/06 11:55 PM
 
 

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