8 year old daughter and things she says??

She gets angry at dumb things then says "i hate my life because i have my sister in it"
(we were watching a woodpecker and her 11 month younger sister scared it away).

she will say she wants a different mom (my neighbor)

is this normal?

to add... going through divorce.

should i be worried, or is she just being an 8 year old?

Re: 8 year old daughter and things she says??

I honestly would be worried. Have you tried talking to her to see what is really bothering her? A divorce is not easy on anyone especially a child. Sometimes they blame themselves for the separation. I would try talking to her and if that doesn't help, I would do counseling. You don't want her to have any resentment towards you or her sister and the older they get the worst it gets.

Re: 8 year old daughter and things she says??

totally normal. She's not only being 8, she's being 9.

My 9 year old tells me:

"You don't understand my life." (why she doesn't want to brush her hair).

"You have no idea how I feel" (because she wants to wear shorts not pants when it's freezing).

"This is it? I have to work for the REST OF MY LIFE? School & then work, every day until the day I die!?" (when I asked her to get ready for school)

Message edited 10/11/2012 10:50:46 AM.

Re: 8 year old daughter and things she says??

I would say it is very normal for the age. My almost 8 year old DD says MANY of the same things...

"It isnt fair that kids dont get to pick their moms, becuase I wouldnt have picked you" (she was annoyed because I wouldnt let her watch TV)

"when I grow up I am only having one kid, becuase thats the right number, too bad you didnt know that" (annoyed and jealious that her sister got attention for something)

"ughhhh you dont even know how hard my life is....." (cant find acceptable clothes to wear to school and we need to leave)

Honestly the list goes on, I figure it is just an early look into the teenage years....aside from jealiously of her younger sister and regular school issues she doesnt have any other real problems behind the comments, it is just her personality really.....

Re: 8 year old daughter and things she says??

I’m also going with normal.

I don’t have girls.. but my boys have come up with some REALLY terrible things.. much more aggressive than what you have said.

I took them to a family counselor to figure out why they were so nasty sometimes.

The therapist told me straight up that the behavior I was describing was normal. Not nice, not respectful.. but typical of children of their age and background.

We went to a few sessions, she got to speak to the boys one on one and with us and with them together without us.

Result? Normal. They weren’t any more or less aggressive, nasty, angry or maladjusted than most of their peer group. IN FACT she said that they were somewhat better off than a good portion of the families she knew. I was soooo relieved that they weren't budding burdens to society.

She DID say that she felt they might benefit from a more rigorous routine, less ‘freedom’ and more discipline.

And we listened. The boys now have more chores, more stringent expectations relevant to physical and academic exercises and more impactful punishments for misbehavior and for disrespectful things being said to each other or to us. As a result, I have seen a positive change. It’s not perfect. They still ***** and moan and sometimes come out with some real DOOZIES that I just won’t even TELL you because it’s embarrassing.. but that’s part of the whole deal.. you do what you do and when you see a challenge you work to make it better.

Re: 8 year old daughter and things she says??

My 6 year old (ds) talks like this to me all the time.

Re: 8 year old daughter and things she says??

I think it's normal. My DD is eight and just told me tonight that I ruined her life by giving birth to her brother! Drama!!!

Re: 8 year old daughter and things she says??

We are going through similar issues with Emily and it certainly has gotten a lot worse since we had the baby 6 months ago. It's been a rough 6 months.

Re: 8 year old daughter and things she says??

I hate to say it this way, but I am so glad you experience the same things!

I thought rebellion was normal, but some things she says are just down right nasty!!

Re: 8 year old daughter and things she says??

Normal

Re: 8 year old daughter and things she says??

yep, sounds like my DD... she has come out with some similar stuff. i would say if the child is not acting out aggressively or physically hurting him/herself or anyone else then i would just talk to them as much as possible and keep an eye out for anything worse.