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mitabtrfly
Member since 12/06 2770 total posts
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ADVICE NEEDED..PLEASE HELP!!
Hi everyone,
Ok...before I begin I wanted to let you all know I started a new job last week. Prior to my starting, I found out I was pregnant. I haven't mentioned anything to my new employer yet, because:
1. I'm still very early in the pregnancy and am afraid it will jinx it.
2. I'm not sure how they are going to react?
It's not like I knew when they offered me the position. I actually found out later on that same night and when I contacted my friend who works here as well, she said I shouldn't mention anything until I'm 3 months.
Now..I was reading an article in Parents magazine and saw this little section that said "Many women choose to wait until they're through the first trimester, when the risk of miscarriage goes down significantly and they're more confident of keeping the pregnancy. On the other hand, consider how a new employer would feel when, several months after starting work, you reveal your pregnancy. The fact that you accepted the job without telling your employer you were pregnant could permanently damage your relationship"
Here's the thing, I accepted the job BEFORE I found out I was pregnant. I am so excited about this, and don't want my employer to be upset with me. What should I do?? HELP ME PLEASE!!!
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Posted 12/27/06 10:44 AM  |
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want2beamom
Love my boys soooo much!!!
Member since 8/06 10164 total posts
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True love doesn't end with happily ever after...
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Re: ADVICE NEEDED..PLEASE HELP!!
The same exact thing happened to me. I was so nervous, because I thought that they would think that I knew and was hiding something. But by your due date, they will know. I just told my principal last week, and she was very accepting and gracious about it. I would hold out though, until you feel comfortable. I was 17 1/2 weeks when I told her.
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| Posted 12/27/06 10:53 AM |
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mitabtrfly
Member since 12/06 2770 total posts
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Re: ADVICE NEEDED..PLEASE HELP!!
Posted by want2beamom
The same exact thing happened to me. I was so nervous, because I thought that they would think that I knew and was hiding something. But by your due date, they will know. I just told my principal last week, and she was very accepting and gracious about it. I would hold out though, until you feel comfortable. I was 17 1/2 weeks when I told her.
Ok thanks...it's nice to know I'm not the only one who was/is in that situation. I'm sure they will react fine..but still I feel awkward. I guess it helps when you have women supervisors.. 
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| Posted 12/27/06 10:56 AM |
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WhatNow
Say Cheese!
Member since 1/06 8033 total posts
Name:
A (formerly WhatNow?)
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Re: ADVICE NEEDED..PLEASE HELP!!
The fact that you accepted the job without telling your employer you were pregnant could permanently damage your relationship"
I am not sure why parentign magazine would write somethign like that.
YOu pregnancy should have absolutely nothing to do with the employer wanting to hire you. It doesn't even matter whether or not you found out you are pregnant before or after you accepted the offer. Women have children, it is the fact of life. When a comnpany hired a young newly married woman they realize that she will prbably have kids within the next few years.
My advice is not to say anything for another 3 months, much like you wouldn't even if you were there for 5 or 10 years.
Message edited 12/27/2006 10:56:50 AM.
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| Posted 12/27/06 10:56 AM |
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AimeeE2006
Time flies!
Member since 1/06 5698 total posts
Name:
Aimee
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Re: ADVICE NEEDED..PLEASE HELP!!
I am going to have this problem as well. I start a new job on 1/10, but I don't want to say anything to my new boss yet. I'm only a few weeks along.
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| Posted 12/27/06 11:15 AM |
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Ang-Rich
Beyond Compare
Member since 5/05 17988 total posts
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Re: ADVICE NEEDED..PLEASE HELP!!
I was in a similar situation - I accepted the job when I wasn't pregnant but when I started I was pregnant. I had a vacation planned in between and honestly - we had been planning all along to get pregnant on that trip...so we did.
I did not tell my new boss until my 13th week...mostly out of superstition. I didn't tell anyone. I was a wreck to tell her but honestly, you have the law on your side - they cannot fire you for being pregnant. And my own personal advice....work hard! I didn't take a day off even when my DH was begging me to. I had rough mornings where I thought I would never get out of bed - but I did and I came in and put on a happy face and worked my tail off. I put in late nights and tripple checked my work. By the three month mark when I told my boss I had already built a reputation. I told her that I would work just as hard (never say harder because it implies you were not before) and her response - "You have given me no reason to doubt that." She was happy for me and it went really well. In the meanwhile - I continue to work hard because I need this job and plan to come back. I can honestly say that the news did not ruin the relationship I built with my boss.
Good Luck - it'll all work out.
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| Posted 12/27/06 11:25 AM |
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mitabtrfly
Member since 12/06 2770 total posts
Name:
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Re: ADVICE NEEDED..PLEASE HELP!!
Posted by Ang-Rich
I was in a similar situation - I accepted the job when I wasn't pregnant but when I started I was pregnant. I had a vacation planned in between and honestly - we had been planning all along to get pregnant on that trip...so we did.
I did not tell my new boss until my 13th week...mostly out of superstition. I didn't tell anyone. I was a wreck to tell her but honestly, you have the law on your side - they cannot fire you for being pregnant. And my own personal advice....work hard! I didn't take a day off even when my DH was begging me to. I had rough mornings where I thought I would never get out of bed - but I did and I came in and put on a happy face and worked my tail off. I put in late nights and tripple checked my work. By the three month mark when I told my boss I had already built a reputation. I told her that I would work just as hard (never say harder because it implies you were not before) and her response - "You have given me no reason to doubt that." She was happy for me and it went really well. In the meanwhile - I continue to work hard because I need this job and plan to come back. I can honestly say that the news did not ruin the relationship I built with my boss.
Good Luck - it'll all work out.
thanks!!!!!!! That's exactly what I plan to do here.
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| Posted 12/27/06 11:26 AM |
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Ang-Rich
Beyond Compare
Member since 5/05 17988 total posts
Name:
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Re: ADVICE NEEDED..PLEASE HELP!!
Just wanted to say..if you are really feeling sick - take the day off...sometimes it's worse to push yourself like that. I am just really stubborn so I forced myself but I then had to make sure I looked okay. Kinda annoying. My advice would be to really be conservative with time off right now.
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| Posted 12/27/06 11:31 AM |
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MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: ADVICE NEEDED..PLEASE HELP!!
I waited until my 30 probation was over to tell them. I know that legally they could not do anything, but during the 30 day probation they can let you go without cause.
They actually took it very well, and were very excited for me & DH.
ETA: I was 9 weeks when I accepted the job.
Message edited 12/27/2006 11:41:26 AM.
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| Posted 12/27/06 11:38 AM |
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