Am i unreasonable-tell me the truth

We have a sick baby in the family who has been in the hospital since she was 4 mths old (she is now 11 mths). Well some family was here visiting today, her mom included. I am getting excited about having less than 6 weeks left and DH bought some of the baby clothes I ordered from online to the hospital for me to see. We were all talking about our but everyone was tip toeing around the topic of my baby being healthy etc. Is it unfair of me to be a little upset or am I being unreasonable that I have to watch what I say all the time. I feel sorry for her, I have shed many a tear and prayed for a miracle. We havent had an easy pregnancy either and fortunately it looks like we are going to make it and I need to share what the doc says when we pass tests like biophysical etc I dont rub it in and make sure to ask about her daughter too but I dont feel like talking about the baby is off limits-after all they are visiting me in the hospital

Message edited 7/15/2007 9:42:54 PM.

Re: Am i unreasonable-tell me the truth

i dont think you are being unreasonable at all. if you were visiting THEM i could understand why you would want to tip-toe around the issue, but like you said, they are visiting YOU!!

Re: Am i unreasonable-tell me the truth

Thank you. I didnt want to seem like I didnt care whats going on. I really am feeling for the mom

Re: Am i unreasonable-tell me the truth

Honestly I'd be a little PC around the mom. I would be 'over-the-moon' or go on and on. They came to see you, yes, that means the baby too, but I would have the focus of the conversations be how you feel and then other news and affairs, not how healthy and well your baby is doing. I'm sure it's obvious, and will be even more so once you tater to is here.

Re: Am i unreasonable-tell me the truth

I don't think you're being unreasonable, but I would try and be a little sensitive around her. Like Christain said, I wouldn't go on and on about how healthy the baby is - that will be very obvious in less than 6 weeks. I would try and focus on how you are feeeling, and some of the things you got for .

I am in a similar situation with a cousin of mine, but it is not a cousin I see very often. My mom, however, sees his mom all the time, and often feels bad when the talk turns to my pregnancy.

Message edited 7/16/2007 6:16:46 AM.

Re: Am i unreasonable-tell me the truth

Re: Am i unreasonable-tell me the truth

I don't think you are being unreasonable at all

Re: Am i unreasonable-tell me the truth

I would just keep in low key when and if they visit. Since its not that often. you have every right to be happy about the birth of your child, but since they cannot be there for very long , I would save the clothes and stuff for when they leave, just because of how hard it must be for them ( not sure of the details or what a sick baby means , how sick etc).... Im surprised they even have the strength to visit you.

Re: Am i unreasonable-tell me the truth

No way are you being unreasonable at all. It isnt like you are having an easy time yourself.

Re: Am i unreasonable-tell me the truth

I don't think you are being unreasonable at all....as you said they are visting you.

Re: Am i unreasonable-tell me the truth

Thanks ladies. I am just in a rock and a hard place. I am trying to be PC but considering my journey (its not over) -I have come to the conclusion that I cant NOT talk about my and how she is doing when asked. I just wont go on and on (which I am not) so I thinks there has to be a give and take on her end too after giving the issue some thought. Thanks for lettiing me stop beating myself up.

Re: Am i unreasonable-tell me the truth

You are not being unreasonable at all. After all you have been through you can talk about anything you want.



The fact of the matter is you are having a baby, not to offend your family but because it's what you want. You have been through so much you should be focused on the good whenever you can. If people are going to bring negativity to you when they visit then they shouldn't come.

So nice of your DH to bring in the clothes, aren't they just so cute and tiny??

Re: Am i unreasonable-tell me the truth

Posted by patti08

You are not being unreasonable at all. After all you have been through you can talk about anything you want.



The fact of the matter is you are having a baby, not to offend your family but because it's what you want. You have been through so much you should be focused on the good whenever you can. If people are going to bring negativity to you when they visit then they shouldn't come.

So nice of your DH to bring in the clothes, aren't they just so cute and tiny??