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karjules
Love my Jules :)
Member since 1/07 2056 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Anyone feel like their DC loves the babysitter...
More than they??? DD is usually cranky when I pick her up or drop her off at babysitter. Then the minute she sees her she crawls right over to her and sits in her lap...and looks as happy as a clam..
Working Mom guilt is bad enough, now this!!! 
Message edited 6/10/2009 8:44:23 AM.
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Posted 6/10/09 8:42 AM  |
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mikeswife06
Drama Momma
Member since 9/06 9947 total posts
Name:
Anne
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Re: Anyone feel like their DC loves the babysitter...
I know how awful that must feel but imagine if you had to leave her kicking, screaming, and crying. That might be even worse.
Please don't beat yourself up. My wonderful friends always remind me that being a working mom is providing your child with a lot and helping to support your family is nothing to feel guilty about. When I look at it that way I always feel better. 
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| Posted 6/10/09 8:45 AM |
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aliwnec10
mom of 3 boys
Member since 4/06 11426 total posts
Name:
Ali
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Re: Anyone feel like their DC loves the babysitter...
I know how you feel!!!!
Jacen can be the same way. He can be having a total miserable morning or be so sick and an absolute crank pot. But once he goes over to grammy and poppy's... he's so happy and good for them.   It's quite annoying.
He even went through a period when i would go pick him up, he'd see me and cry. He didn't want to leave. 
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| Posted 6/10/09 8:49 AM |
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karjules
Love my Jules :)
Member since 1/07 2056 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: Anyone feel like their DC loves the babysitter...
At least I am not alone. I am so happy she is in good hands at the babysitter, but I can't help but wonder what she does differently that makes her like her more than me...
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| Posted 6/10/09 8:50 AM |
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aliwnec10
mom of 3 boys
Member since 4/06 11426 total posts
Name:
Ali
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Re: Anyone feel like their DC loves the babysitter...
Posted by karanthony
At least I am not alone. I am so happy she is in good hands at the babysitter, but I can't help but wonder what she does differently that makes her like her more than me...
Well i know with my in laws, they give jacen treats all the time, they break out all the toys and it's just play play play time. I would love it too if i was jacen.
When i get him, it's all about routine and not much play time. We get home, he eats dinner, bath, some play time and bed. I'm sure it's the same with you, so it's all about the regular day to day stuff instead of just constant play. You know what i mean?
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| Posted 6/10/09 8:59 AM |
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krashnburn
I am Batman!
Member since 5/05 4093 total posts
Name:
I'm Batman, I tell you!
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Re: Anyone feel like their DC loves the babysitter...
I know how you feel. We've been home and he's been upset and asked for Ms. Rufie (Ruthie).
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| Posted 6/10/09 8:59 AM |
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tann22
LIF Adult
Member since 6/05 2421 total posts
Name:
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Re: Anyone feel like their DC loves the babysitter...
I'm so glad you posted this. Since last week I feel like
DS likes his teachers at daycare more than me. Once we walk into the room at daycare I don't exist anymore to him. He doesn't even look at me anymore when I leave. I know I should be happy that he's not crying when I leave but just a little smile would make me happy.
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| Posted 6/10/09 9:39 AM |
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pinkandblue
Our family is complete, maybe
Member since 9/05 32436 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Anyone feel like their DC loves the babysitter...
I love that my dd loves her sitter....she runs to her and is always happy to see her. But, at the end of the day, when I pick her up, she is JUST as happy to see me
as a PP said, it would be worse if they did not like the sitter
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| Posted 6/10/09 9:41 AM |
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adeline27
LIF Adult
Member since 5/06 3121 total posts
Name:
Angela
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Re: Anyone feel like their DC loves the babysitter...
Posted by karanthony
At least I am not alone. I am so happy she is in good hands at the babysitter, but I can't help but wonder what she does differently that makes her like her more than me...
This was so me when my DC was around 14/16 months (he's now 19months). I would drop him off at my moms for half days M-F (I work P/T) and when I would pick him up he would hide or even when I would just open the front door and he sees me he lets out a huge cry then runs to her for her to pick him up. I was hurt by it and sometime got annoyed because he made it difficult to leave and I always looked like the bad person.
First off my mom is very fun to be around with. She's singing, dancing, feed him everything he wants, they watch cartoons together. Honestly why would he want to leave that I have to admit I don't have all that free time to do all that either when we're home together so I think he knows that. I still have to clean the home and prepare dinner for DH so he knows my time with him is not like the time he gets with my mom.
As far as what I did differently I would come and surprise with a little toy, I would have my mom walk him to my car which he was totally fine about. Maybe have your sitter do the same? I also loosened up I didn't totally rush him when I got there and when I got home I continued the play for a little bit before I put him down for a nap.
When we're home he is all over me even when DH is there. I know he's just playing the field.
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| Posted 6/10/09 10:01 AM |
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jambalady
Is it summer yet?
Member since 8/06 7392 total posts
Name:
Holly
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Re: Anyone feel like their DC loves the babysitter...
It WILL get better.
DS did this to me for months, like 6 months to be precise.
He would cry when I came to pick him up and crawl right to my mom (who is my babysitter) and would not go to me at all. He would scream when I tried to pick him up and basically cry the whole way home.
Like Ali said, with the babysitter, it's all play and fun during the day. with us, it's the morning routine and the nighttime routine.
It would break my heart every time I picked him up.
But, finally, DS does not do this anymore. He smiles when I come home and comes straight to me.
Nothing has changed. I truly think it was just a stage.
What worked for me was slowing warming up to DS instead of just swooping in and taking him from my mom.
Hopefully things will get better for you soon.
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| Posted 6/10/09 10:09 AM |
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Bops
My 3 wishes
Member since 12/07 13625 total posts
Name:
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Re: Anyone feel like their DC loves the babysitter...
As a daycare provider who has been "the babysitter" who gets crawled to on drop-off  , I will give you the twist on it from my perspective...
When I had children in my care, because I was a good care-taker- they were my one and ONLY priority...From the minute they walked in my door, until the minute they left, they were it..Thats what I was getting payed to do, and thats what my goal was ...
It is different as a parent, even as a SAHM ( which I am now) There are other "things' to do, laundry to fold, phones to answer, dishwashers to unload...When children would come to me, they had all the spotlight...As a parent, that simply is not feasible or practical... In the morning, its a change of scenery from home, all new toys all over again etc...Also, at the end of the day, children in general get tired and cranky and would be that way regardless if Elmo was coming to pick them up !The fact that your DC is comfortable there is a great thing, even though I know how hard it is to see...My DS was a cling-on to me when I first started sending him to pre-k , at first it was frusturating but a little flattering honestly...Once he started walking in there without even so much as a half kiss on the cheek and running up the stairs, it was , but at the same time  ( I knew I made the right choice, he was happy and thats what I wanted deep down) ...
Just know , that your DC has an unconditional love that she only gets from you and she knows it...She is so comfortable with you that , just like adults, when we are "comfortable with our spouses, family etc, we take them for granted sort of, and the love is unspoken ...And also as a daycare provider, I can tell you first hand, all we hear about all day is how Mommy does things this way, or daddy does this with me etc...
I think you made an excellent choice in a babysitter , thats what I think !!!
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| Posted 6/10/09 10:17 AM |
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karjules
Love my Jules :)
Member since 1/07 2056 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: Anyone feel like their DC loves the babysitter...
Thank you everyone for your replies
I think it is definitely related to her playing all day long/versus me the "nap meenie" and routine, chores, etc. I try to do a few fun things when I pick her up, like the swing at the park or music class, or walks in the stroller, but as for playing all afternoon when I get home, that doesn't always happen.
I think the babysitter is more fun than me 
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| Posted 6/10/09 10:20 AM |
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karjules
Love my Jules :)
Member since 1/07 2056 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: Anyone feel like their DC loves the babysitter...
Posted by Bops
As a daycare provider who has been "the babysitter" who gets crawled to on drop-off , I will give you the twist on it from my perspective...
When I had children in my care, because I was a good care-taker- they were my one and ONLY priority...From the minute they walked in my door, until the minute they left, they were it..Thats what I was getting payed to do, and thats what my goal was ...
It is different as a parent, even as a SAHM ( which I am now) There are other "things' to do, laundry to fold, phones to answer, dishwashers to unload...When children would come to me, they had all the spotlight...As a parent, that simply is not feasible or practical... In the morning, its a change of scenery from home, all new toys all over again etc...Also, at the end of the day, children in general get tired and cranky and would be that way regardless if Elmo was coming to pick them up !The fact that your DC is comfortable there is a great thing, even though I know how hard it is to see...My DS was a cling-on to me when I first started sending him to pre-k , at first it was frusturating but a little flattering honestly...Once he started walking in there without even so much as a half kiss on the cheek and running up the stairs, it was , but at the same time ( I knew I made the right choice, he was happy and thats what I wanted deep down) ...
Just know , that your DC has an unconditional love that she only gets from you and she knows it...She is so comfortable with you that , just like adults, when we are "comfortable with our spouses, family etc, we take them for granted sort of, and the love is unspoken ...And also as a daycare provider, I can tell you first hand, all we hear about all day is how Mommy does things this way, or daddy does this with me etc...
I think you made an excellent choice in a babysitter , thats what I think !!!
Thank you so much for taking the time to give me the babysitters point of view. Your reply was so touching, I truly appreciate your words of wisdom!!!
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| Posted 6/10/09 10:22 AM |
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PrincessP
Big sister!!!!!!!!!!
Member since 12/05 17450 total posts
Name:
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Re: Anyone feel like their DC loves the babysitter...
Posted by Mikismom
I love that my dd loves her sitter....she runs to her and is always happy to see her. But, at the end of the day, when I pick her up, she is JUST as happy to see me
as a PP said, it would be worse if they did not like the sitter
Ditto
I feel exactly the same.
She definitely doesnt love anyone more...but she does love her sitter. She calls her MiMi...they have a great relationship. Shes like another grandma to her.
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| Posted 6/10/09 10:23 AM |
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DC HJJ M
Member since 8/07 3732 total posts
Name:
Crystal
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Re: Anyone feel like their DC loves the babysitter...
I definitely know how you feel. im sorry you have to go through it. I have been there many times.
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| Posted 6/10/09 10:43 AM |
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