Anyone out there have a very stressful job with long hours??

Thought I would post here... as our time to start TTC gets closer and closer, I cannot comprehend how I am going to get through this.

I barely manage to make it through the week now-- I am overcome with joy if I get out of work at 5 30. I recently started working out again and feel like all I do is work, and work out... get home at like 7:30/8, eat, zone out in front of the TV and go to bed. I am only home now cause I left work early due to feeling ill.

I never thought I would be someone who wanted to stay home with kids-- but the closer I get to this being my real life, albeit, I am not even pregnant yet-- I really worry about how I am going to handle this. I make more money than DH and without my salary-- our lives would be drastically different.

I worry about when I am pregnant dealing with a demanding and stressful job and worry about after I have a kid-- how I am going to do it. I see the nervous breakdown in my future already.

Just wondering what other girls thoughts are who are in similar situations.

Re: Anyone out there have a very stressful job with long hours??

This is really the reason I left my job in the city to come back and sell real estate. I was working crazy hours and making crazy money. If I left on time I would be home at 7:30 (and my boss would flip if I left on time)

Once I got home the first thing I would do is jump on the computer to check my work emails. The stress was really just too much to handle and I was at my breaking point all together. I didn't care how much money I was making I knew I would have a nervous breakdown if I stayed.

I also started thinking about my future and how I would work being at that job with kids. I would have been able to work at least one day at home (Maybe two) but I still think it would have been too much. Also, I know that being pregnant and working there would have been torture!

I decided to come back to the island and really randomly picked selling real estate. I have to say it's the best decision I have made (of course my bank account doesn't feel the same way but I def. do)

I'm not sure if you commute into the city or not either but that was a huge factor for me. Killing almost 3 hours a day to get into the city was really taking a toll on me.


We have also had to make sacrifices money wise. With my salary (That was about 25K more then DH's at the time) I didn't have to think about a single purchase. I could buy whatever I wanted without a thought. Now, when I look at something I want to buy I do really second guess and ask myself if I really need it.

Sorry to ramble on and I'm not sure I helped you at all - but just know that whatever you decide to do it will be the right decision for you and your family. Try to weigh the pros and cons. I really thought about leaving for a long time but it wasn't until we started thinking about a family that I knew I had to make a change.

Re: Anyone out there have a very stressful job with long hours??

being pregnant with a stressful job... i can tell you a thing or two about that

the law prohibits medical residents from working more than 80 hours per week, so i never go that high. but this week, for example, from sunday to sunday i will have worked 75 hours. this includes two 12-hour shifts, 8a-8p, and one 24 hour shift. i am 24 weeks pregnant. at one point during the beginning of my second trimester, i worked night float - 8a to 8p - sunday through thursday night for 4 weeks.

it's NOT easy, that much i can say. but i also think that it depends on what kind of pregnancy you have. my first trimester was disastrous, and i had to have all sorts of accomodations made for me. i was out of work for 4 weeks! but i don't think that's the norm at all - i think most people get through the work day even if they're sick. it's tough, but definitely doable.

now about having a stressful job when you actually have the child... i'm not sure what exactly i'll do because i'm not there yet. but i did wait until my hardest years were behind me. from now on i will work anywhere from 40-52 hours a week, but rarely more. i struggle with wanting to work even less than that, but for the next two years i won't be able to. after residency is done i may stay at home for a while, but like you were saying, losing the income will HURT...

Re: Anyone out there have a very stressful job with long hours??

I did have a very stressful job with HORRIBLY long hours. I was never out by 5:30. 7:00 was a good night. On bad nights, it would be midnight or on some nights I never left! There were many times when I had to work late late nights or weekends. When I started at the job I thought I would stay there until I had kids but after working there for a few years and seeing other pg moms going through it I realized it was not for me so, I left when I decided I wanted to start a family. It was a very hard decision because, like you said is your situation, I was making a huge amount of $$$ and significantly more than DH.

That said, now, almost 8 mos pg I have no idea how the pg woman at my job did it. I have NEVER regretted my decision for a second and am so glad I put off ttc until I left that job.

Not sure if this helps since I am no longer working but hopefully it helps a little Good luck!

Message edited 6/26/2007 6:06:46 PM.

Re: Anyone out there have a very stressful job with long hours??

thanks for your responses-- Alex, I have no idea how you do it-- but I guess at least you are in a hospital!

I do work in the city-- but my commute is like 35 mins on the Path train and walking-- I only live 2 or 3 miles outside of the city. So, while I would prefer to drive to work for 35 mins-- as opposed to walking a mile each way, and standing or sitting on a crowded train, it's not the LIRR or Metro North. And I CAN drive pretty painlessly-- I just have to pay $26 a day to park.

I just started my job three months ago-- I swithed jobs to join my old boss who left the company where he hired me-- and took me with him when he left... so, I will have to stay working there for a while. I put off TTC because of changing jobs-- but, I cannot seem to stop thinking about it now! Well-- at least I will really start planning and getting ready.

I am just so nervous about it all-- we live in a 2BR apt, and will need a house-- and I worry about being able to afford a house we want if I don't work.. But if I do work-- there are just so many hours in the day, ya know?

I guess I will wait til the time comes-- but, if we need to, we can live on one salary, or I can take some time off and look for another job-- not in Manhattan with regular hours, less pay-- but less stress, and perhaps on site or nearby day care.

Re: Anyone out there have a very stressful job with long hours??

Posted by alexlynn7

being pregnant with a stressful job... i can tell you a thing or two about that

the law prohibits medical residents from working more than 80 hours per week, so i never go that high. but this week, for example, from sunday to sunday i will have worked 75 hours. this includes two 12-hour shifts, 8a-8p, and one 24 hour shift. i am 24 weeks pregnant. at one point during the beginning of my second trimester, i worked night float - 8a to 8p - sunday through thursday night for 4 weeks.

it's NOT easy, that much i can say. but i also think that it depends on what kind of pregnancy you have. my first trimester was disastrous, and i had to have all sorts of accomodations made for me. i was out of work for 4 weeks! but i don't think that's the norm at all - i think most people get through the work day even if they're sick. it's tough, but definitely doable.

now about having a stressful job when you actually have the child... i'm not sure what exactly i'll do because i'm not there yet. but i did wait until my hardest years were behind me. from now on i will work anywhere from 40-52 hours a week, but rarely more. i struggle with wanting to work even less than that, but for the next two years i won't be able to. after residency is done i may stay at home for a while, but like you were saying, losing the income will HURT...

Re: Anyone out there have a very stressful job with long hours??

This was me and I worked until the day I gave birth. I still work long hours, but my son is in daycare... You will do what you feel is right when the time comes...

Re: Anyone out there have a very stressful job with long hours??

Yeah, I'm pretty much in the same position. Luckily, my pregnancy has been pretty easy and I live in walking distance of work so by subway, it takes all of 10 minutes. I hope to scale back a bit when the baby comes but we'll see how it goes. One thing we're doing to make it a bit easier is staying in the city for a couple more years, just moving into a 2BR from our 1BR. We thought about doing the house/burbs thing but besides the fact that I feel like that would be too many adjustments at once, I'm hoping my short commute and proximity to home will make the career mom transition easier. I'll let you know how it goes

Re: Anyone out there have a very stressful job with long hours??

I'm going through the same phase as you. As you know I just changed jobs. Part of my taking this newest one was it got me out of the city and closer to home. My thinking was we want to TTC very soon and I didn't want to be PG commuting so far and dealing with the stress I was dealing with. Well, now I've started this new gig and it is still stressful and long hours, so I'm rethinking that as well. I'm very confused about waht to do b/c of TTCing. Part of my new attitude, or what I'm trying to convince myself of, is that things work out somehow and since we don't know how long TTCing will take, just go for it when ready and the other pieces will fall into place and we will all do what's best for ourselves and our family. Not sure if that helps at all, but wanted you to know I'm in the same boat.

Re: Anyone out there have a very stressful job with long hours??

I have been thinking about this a lot lately and not sure what I am going to to. Right now my commute is about an hour 15 each way. I get home anytime between 7:30pm - 10:30pm and then I get online at home and do more work.

The money is great, but the hours are killing me now with no baby. I will go back to work in Mid January after maternity leave and I think am going to stick it out untilI get my bonus in April and then maybe have to take a step down here and do something less stressful with a paycut. If not, I will probably look for something on LI even if its for half of what I am making now.

Message edited 6/27/2007 9:28:12 PM.

Re: Anyone out there have a very stressful job with long hours??

I hear you. We are not trying yet, but my new job is very demanding...I work a lot of times until 6:30 or even as late as 7:30. I know when they hired me, they wanted me to be here for the haul or for more ventures, but I can't imagine doing this and having a baby. I am hoping when the time comes, I can come in a few days/work home a few days....we'll see. But there's no way I am working like this and having a baby; I just have nothing left by 8 at night. Now, my DH makes a lot more than I do, so I'm not totally in your situation, however, losing my income would still hurt.....

Re: Anyone out there have a very stressful job with long hours??

This has been a topic on DH and my minds. I work 12 hour shifts overnight. He works days. So He would be up with the baby all night have to go to work and then I would have the baby during the day to go back to work when he gets home. When would we sleep?? Plus with our budget and getting a house I need my second job to help pay the bills. Its never enough

Re: Anyone out there have a very stressful job with long hours??

I guess I can say I kinda do. I'm an RN and work the overnight shift 8pm-8am-it wasn't too bad my first pregnancy since I would nap before work and come home and sleep all day. NOT the case this pregnancy with an almost 3 year old to take care of after work

Re: Anyone out there have a very stressful job with long hours??

That is the exact reason I stopped working in the city. Now I am within 10 minutes of my house. Do I make as much as I would in the city? Nope. But to me it will be worth it to be able to jump in the car and get to the babysitter/ day care if need be.

Re: Anyone out there have a very stressful job with long hours??

I usually work 8-7ish and make the same amt as DH, but I think I make more whenyou look at my health benefits etc.

WE have a 7 week old now and I am on maternity leave. I am really scareed about going to work since we have no babysitter now

Before DS I would work, go to the gym or just hang out with DH---now I know when I come home I will have a 2ns job with DS

Once you have your baby, you will have strength to deal with him/her even though you feel tired now...