At what age does lying to your child become the "wrong" thing to do???

I feel horrible admitting this, but lately my 2 year old has been obsessed with playing with his friend Harry because Harry has a lot of "choo choo's" (as if Noah doesn't have any, the ingrate) so for the last few days I have had to tell Noah that we were going to Harry's house everytime we left the house because otherwise he would just throw a tantrum (and oh boy, he threw a SPECTACULAR one in the park this weekend)

So my query is thus, right now its quite harmless, telling Noah that we are going to play with Harry and his choo-choos, but when does it become just downright wrong and not a nice thing to do??? So far it helps me to get through my day, but soon, its not going to be such a little white lie.

Re: At what age does lying to your child become the "wrong" thing to do???

I think once he questions why there not at harrys, then its time to stop. Because he will then think its okay to lie.

Re: At what age does lying to your child become the "wrong" thing to do???

I think at his age right now, you can get away with it. Lord knows we've all done it.

But now that my DS is 3.5, he is alot slicker now and no dummy and he calls my bluff. so if I try to tell him a white lie about something, he will out come right out and ask me about it if he realizes that mommy is following through. So I'm better off just telling him the truth from the get go. I have learned that communicating to them about what you're doing ahead of time prepares them for what is about to come. So if we're at the park and it's getting to be go home time, I will give them a 5-10 minute heads-up that we'll be leaving soon. It usually makes it alot easier.

Re: At what age does lying to your child become the "wrong" thing to do???

Hmmm...at the age of 6 my son wholeheartedly believes that restaurants have spanking rooms.

I think he's going to start to catch on & then you'll have to come up with something else. Until then, whatever works for you.

Re: At what age does lying to your child become the "wrong" thing to do???

At 2 1/2 my DD questions everything I do, so I don't lie to her. I don't want her to not believe me when I tell her something.

And I don't know about telling him he's going to his friend's house when he's not. It has to be disaapointing to him KWIM?

Re: At what age does lying to your child become the "wrong" thing to do???

Re: At what age does lying to your child become the "wrong" thing to do???

I try not to lie to them since I don't want them to not trust me. I think telling him you are going somewhere and then not going there is going to backfire at some point. These kids are smarter then we thibk, and they let on.

Re: At what age does lying to your child become the "wrong" thing to do???

Other than the Easter Bunny and Santa, I don't lie to my DD even at 14 months old. I want her to believe me always when I tell her important things. I have a big issue with lying in general however. Even if it does serve its purpose in the short term, I think it always bits you in the butt later.

Re: At what age does lying to your child become the "wrong" thing to do???

I don't believe in lying to my children about things like that at any age. IF they can understand it, I don't belive in lying. I think it makes life easier to be truthful, cause at some point a kid is going to figure it out and when they can't count on what you say then all hell breaks loose. I mean I am one to give my kid a 2 min warning before going anywhere consistently. This gives him time to finish up what he is doing to prepare to go. If I was him, I would not like to be dragged out the door with no warning. Also, when I am leaving him behind with a babysitter I always say goodbye, this way when someone comes over he knows I will not just sneak away from him. I found it made him less clingy and easier to handle in the long run. There are no surprises. If I say we are going to the park, that's where we are going, but if we are going to the store, he just has to deal.

Now Santa and the Easter bunny are different. I am vague, but still a fibber.

Re: At what age does lying to your child become the "wrong" thing to do???

I don't know...I am almost 32 and my Mom is still lying to me

Re: At what age does lying to your child become the "wrong" thing to do???