At what point should I become "worried"

Ds has always been on the small side (10-20th percentile- although he was born in the 90th percentile, go figure!)

He isnt a good eater, never has been! There are days where he barely eats anything at all... I try not to push it, because the last thing I want is for him to feel pushed into eating (thats where obeseity begins) but in the back of my head Im totally freaking out about it!

For the longest time the Dr blamed everything on teething, or the fact that DS was active and didnt want to sit still.. However he is now 2 yrs old, has all his teeth, and guess what he still doesnt eat!!!

In an entire year DS only gained 4lbs. His reg Dr. is an oldie (but goodie) he isnt concerned and feels he will eventually catch up.
This past weekend we saw the other Dr in the practice (we were there for the croup) when the Dr prescribed DS steroids, he had him weighed first. When he realized DS' weight gain for the year had only been 4 lbs he made a remark like "Id really like to see another couple lbs on him" - Gee thanks Doc, like I can make that happen.

I did buy the pediasure bars- DS thinks they are a treat, and they act as a meal on days DS hasnt eaten all day.

My Dr. has also suggested "taking advantage of junk food"- If I have seen that DS hadnt eaten all week, and I know he'll eat a happy meal, then to pick one up... But sometimes that dosent even work.

I mean- Ds is the smallest in his class, but he is also the youngest and to be quite honest with you, he isnt that much smaller....

Im just so scared he has some "feeding" issues, and I dont know what to do.

I mean I guess if he was gonna be one of 2 extremes Id rather this, than him be obsessed with food.

With all that said, DS is growing fine, he is healthy, very active, and very chatty. So the little nutrition he is getting is working for him

Any advice is welcomed

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

I wouldn't worry about it at all, if your doctor is saying he is just on the small side...don't worry about it!

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

It didn't sound like he felt it was a big problem - more of a casual - eh he can gain a few.

I don't know - I mean I have a small toddler too...and of course some days I worry about it..but I have to tell you my family is PLAGUED with weight issues...and I really feel strongly about letting Talia dictate what she needs and not forcing her to eat when she doesn't want to because I don't want her to have food issues.

On top of that I totally disagree with your dr. about junk food..I think that just causes bad habits.

I was always a REALLY skinny kid...I mean boney. Dr's used to ask me if I was anorexic (I wasn't). I ate really healthy growing up so I didn't have a ton of extra fat I guess.

BUT guess what - I had to go on Weight watchers recently because I couldn't lose my extra weight from the baby and my eating habits were terrible.

SO I think the moral of the story is that you know your kid best. IS he happy? Healthy? learning? (I think the answer is yes!!) So try not to worry too much!!

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

Well thats it, you can't make the kid eat!! He isn't starving, he isn't sickly...just let him eat whatever he wants, whenever he wants. Pump him up with calories if you have the chance, give him the fattiest foods you can find.

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

See my DH's side of the family is all over weight (some boderline obese) so I really dont want to push him.

My side of the family (not me- but the rest of them ) are all really boney and skinny- I dont even think my mom weighs 100lbs.

Their is no "normal" weight on either side of the family...

As far as the junk food goes: The Dr's exact words were "McD's chicken nuggets have nutritional value" His feeling is not to abuse it- but if my child hasnt eaten in days, and thats something he'll eat- then to give it to him... Its better than nothing. He didnt mean junk food- like candy, cookies, stuff like that. Like I said though, that dosent always work.


Ryan still gets 2 bottles of milk/day- the Dr is hesitant to even take that away because of his poor eating habits...


I guess things were said casually, and maybe Im reading too far into them. Why make a remark though w/o suggesting how to rectify the problem???

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

I would try to think of ways to sneak healthy fat ( no junk food ) into his diet- i.e slice up avocado on to grilled cheese, put flax seed oil in his oatmeal,etc.

I understand how your DHs family is obese. How much does that weigh in to your descision not to 'force' food? I'm not trying to be snarky, b/c I have no idea how you approach mealtime with your DS, but maybe you do have to force food a little bit, KWIM?

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

Posted by jgm26

I would try to think of ways to sneak healthy fat ( no junk food ) into his diet- i.e slice up avocado on to grilled cheese, put flax seed oil in his oatmeal,etc.

I understand how your DHs family is obese. How much does that weigh in to your descision not to 'force' food? I'm not trying to be snarky, b/c I have no idea how you approach mealtime with your DS, but maybe you do have to force food a little bit, KWIM?

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

How are his adenoids and tonsils? Does he get a lot of ear, nose or throat infections? My brother was 90% for height and 10% for weight. He had super enlarged adenoids. He could not smell for taste food because his adenoids were so large so he never wanted to eat. The doctors removed his tonsils and adenoids and then he started to eat. Today my brother is the size of a line backer and 6 foot 5 inches.

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

My girlfriend pushed the issue for her son because it didn't feel right to her either. Her son was put on Ensure to get some nutrients & some weight on him.

Marissa - I would keep a food diary on everything he eats for the course of a week. That can give you & your doctor a better gauge of what's going on when you do re-address the issue.

Worry is all part of the terroritory.

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

I would also say, don’t make the not eating thing an issue. With Noah, once he starts playing with his food and trying to stand up in his highchair, I say fine, dinner is over. We climb down and head into the living room to start playing. Don’t try to force food on him, that will only lead to more food issues in the future. I used to give Noah a bottle of follow on formula at night if he didn’t eat his dinner. Sometimes Noah will go back to the table and bring me in his plate and eat more food…so I let him. I give him a big bowl of fruit, and he loves that.

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

Maris, I think RJ looks good. Dont focus on the numbers vs what he actually looks like. Yes, hes definitely light and yes he might be able to put on some pounds but he doesnt look sickly nor act sickly so I wouldnt be too concerned. I didnt even notice a major weight issue when he was playing at his party from him vs the other children. Be happy you have a good looking son that is alot of fun to be around! Within time he will gain weight or you will take him up to the gym and work him out
If he hangs around Gilly long enough ...he will gain some weight...everything I stick in my mouth...she wants

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

I think you're doing everything you can. From your decription the ped doesn't seem that worried, our ped otld us they only worry if they're at or below the 5th percentile. My DD is also pretty small, and she is also a picky eater, so I understand your worry. But as long as he's healthy and as long as he's growing in the same trajectory (if he has been in the 10-20th percentile for a while) than I wouldn't worry.

My only advice (which I'm sure you're already doing) is sneak in the extra food with small mini-meals or snacks between meals. And make sure everything he eats has as much nutrition as possible (of course you're getting this advice from someone who has no problem giving her DD junk food and doesn't always serve a veggie at every meal!). But honestly, I'm sure you're doing everything you can, and you're right, you can't force him to eat.

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

Thanks, you all gave such great advice...

Im def. gonna keep a log, I think that will be the best way to approach it w/ the Dr at his next visit.

I dont make his eating (or lack of) an issue. I dont fight or force, like I said before. Sometimes I offer a substitute, but if he dosent want it- dinner is over and we move on.

RJ is extremely active (Paulette can vouch for that) he is always running, walking backwards, jumping, dancing SOMETHING.

So I think when he does eat- he burns those calories faster than he consumes them

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

I just made a post about this yesterday because I also worry about Emily's weight sometimes. She has her 2 year checkup at the end of this month and I don't htink she is going to have gained anything since her 18 month checkup.

She is very touch and go with her eating habits, although I have to admit that sometimes she does eat really good. I also let her have some "junk" food sometimes if it's all I can get into her, but try to encourage her to eat healthy foods too that she likes, like beans, bananas, grapes, dry cereal, etc. I also just got her to start drinking milk again since about 6 months ago when we took her off of the bottle, and she's drinking about 12 oz a day (if that, some days none at all) with just a small bit of nestle chocolate powder in it --- I figured light choco milk is better then no milk at all.

I have some serious issues with food myself, so I try not to stress her out about eating, and I am getting better at not stressing about it. Seriously though I would maybe make a seperate appt with the pediatrician who you see regularly, let him know what the other DR said, and talk to him about it seriously, let him know that it really bothers you. Maybe you guys can together come up with some small changes that can make a difference.

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

Re: At what point should I become "worried"

Nate is also the same way, from his 1st to 2nd birthday he only gained 3.5lbs. I really just give he what he likes to eat. He can eat bananas, PB&J, Yogurt (drinkable one), sweet potato fries and his new fav strawberries all day. Some evenings the only thing he'll eat is the NutraPal bars.

Try not to worry too much. RJ is thriving and a happy little boy. If he's not lethargic or losing weight, I'd just continue doing what you are doing.

Message edited 10/9/2007 11:10:26 PM.