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mitabtrfly
Member since 12/06 2770 total posts
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Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
I have a friend who found out her husband had been cheating on her prior to their getting married. He came clean in October (after my wedding). They were married in May. Apparently the relationship was going on for more than 6 months. While they have tried to work out their problems (because they have a child together), it doesn't look like it's going to work. She has asked him to move out and I'm wondering if she should go the legal route and file for a separation, and if things don't work out then file for an annullment on the grounds of adultery or file for one now?
TIA!
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Posted 7/12/07 2:40 PM  |
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Kara
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
I don't think anything you've posted shows grounds for a legal annulment in NYS. I believe she will have to get a divorce to end the marriage.
If you're talking about an annulment in the church, you still have to get divorced to legally end the marriage.
Message edited 7/12/2007 2:48:05 PM.
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| Posted 7/12/07 2:46 PM |
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mitabtrfly
Member since 12/06 2770 total posts
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
Posted by Kara
Nothing you've posted shows grounds for a legal annulment in NYS. She will have to get a divorce.
If you're talking about an annulment in the church, you still have to get divorced to legally end the marriage.
Really??? Wow. That's surprising. So what would could be a reason for annullment?
They didn't get married in a church.
What about the fact that he went into the marriage as a lie? Not even that would count? I know she can file for a separation on the grounds of adultery, but at this point it may be best to get divorced right?
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| Posted 7/12/07 2:48 PM |
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hazeleyes33
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 13060 total posts
Name:
Ginger
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
My bil got an annulment but it was 8 months after the wedding. I don't think you have to get a divorce if you do it before a year.
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| Posted 7/12/07 2:48 PM |
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Kara
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
Posted by mitabtrfly
Posted by Kara
Nothing you've posted shows grounds for a legal annulment in NYS. She will have to get a divorce.
If you're talking about an annulment in the church, you still have to get divorced to legally end the marriage.
Really??? Wow. That's surprising. So what would could be a reason for annullment?
They didn't get married in a church.
What about the fact that he went into the marriage as a lie? Not even that would count? I know she can file for a separation on the grounds of adultery, but at this point it may be best to get divorced right?
Why does she want an annulment over a divorce? Practically speaking, there's no difference between the two. Legally, I believe there is a higher burden of proof for the grounds for an annulment.
As far as I know (and I'm NOT an expert) the annulment grounds discussing the marriage being based on fraud is NOT satisfied by stating that your husband was cheating on you before you got married.
Message edited 7/12/2007 2:50:37 PM.
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| Posted 7/12/07 2:49 PM |
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dooodles
When you wish upon a star
Member since 5/05 11997 total posts
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
I am so sorry your friend is going through this 
A friend of mine (guy) went through hel! with his first wife and he still had difficulty getting the marriage annuled through the church.
His wife got jealous when his father became hospitalized with cancer and was given less than 2 months to live. He was VERY close with his Dad and used every single spare moment to spend at the hospital with him. She never stopped giving him grief for spending time with his father and not with her. She ended up leaving after he lost his father because she could not take his grief afterwards. He came home one night from work to find EVERYTHING gone except for an ice cube tray in the freezer and one plate with a fork.
Can you believe after that he still struggled to get the annulment? He was granted it in the end though.
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| Posted 7/12/07 2:51 PM |
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mitabtrfly
Member since 12/06 2770 total posts
Name:
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
Posted by Kara
Posted by mitabtrfly
Posted by Kara
Nothing you've posted shows grounds for a legal annulment in NYS. She will have to get a divorce.
If you're talking about an annulment in the church, you still have to get divorced to legally end the marriage.
Really??? Wow. That's surprising. So what would could be a reason for annullment?
They didn't get married in a church.
What about the fact that he went into the marriage as a lie? Not even that would count? I know she can file for a separation on the grounds of adultery, but at this point it may be best to get divorced right?
Why does she want an annulment over a divorce.
As far as I know (and I'm NOT an expert) the annulment grounds discussing the marriage being based on fraud is NOT satisfied by stating that your husband was cheating on you before you got married.
I don't know that she wants one, but I thought it would be an option as opposed to having to go through a divorce. I guess I was looking at it from my perspective like the marriage really only existed in her mind, not his, so why not annull it and act as if it never happened you know?
I just think it's HORRIBLE that this happened to her, especially since they were together for 3 years prior to getting married, but I guess that goes to show..you don't really know someone. It's just a shame...she's young too.
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| Posted 7/12/07 2:51 PM |
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Kara
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
Posted by dooodles
I am so sorry your friend is going through this
A friend of mine (guy) went through hel! with his first wife and he still had difficulty getting the marriage annuled through the church.
His wife got jealous when his father became hospitalized with cancer and was given less than 2 months to live. He was VERY close with his Dad and used every single spare moment to spend at the hospital with him. She never stopped giving him grief for spending time with his father and not with her. She ended up leaving after he lost his father because she could not take his grief afterwards. He came home one night from work to find EVERYTHING gone except for an ice cube tray in the freezer and one plate with a fork.
Can you believe after that he still struggled to get the annulment? He was granted it in the end though.
She is talking about a legal annulment in NYS, not having the church annul the marriage.
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| Posted 7/12/07 2:52 PM |
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Kara
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Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
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They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
Posted by mitabtrfly
Posted by Kara
Posted by mitabtrfly
Posted by Kara
Nothing you've posted shows grounds for a legal annulment in NYS. She will have to get a divorce.
If you're talking about an annulment in the church, you still have to get divorced to legally end the marriage.
Really??? Wow. That's surprising. So what would could be a reason for annullment?
They didn't get married in a church.
What about the fact that he went into the marriage as a lie? Not even that would count? I know she can file for a separation on the grounds of adultery, but at this point it may be best to get divorced right?
Why does she want an annulment over a divorce.
As far as I know (and I'm NOT an expert) the annulment grounds discussing the marriage being based on fraud is NOT satisfied by stating that your husband was cheating on you before you got married.
I don't know that she wants one, but I thought it would be an option as opposed to having to go through a divorce. I guess I was looking at it from my perspective like the marriage really only existed in her mind, not his, so why not annull it and act as if it never happened you know?
I just think it's HORRIBLE that this happened to her, especially since they were together for 3 years prior to getting married, but I guess that goes to show..you don't really know someone. It's just a shame...she's young too.
An annulment requires the same amount of paperwork and expense as a divorce -- and both give you the same result. An annulment requires a higher burden of proof and corroborating evidence, often from other witnesses. It's much more difficult to get.
I don't think she has anything to gain by filing for an annulment over divorce.
Divorce / separation are NEVER easy... she should talk to a good lawyer who specializes in this area and see what the lawyer has to say.
Message edited 7/12/2007 2:56:34 PM.
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| Posted 7/12/07 2:54 PM |
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mitabtrfly
Member since 12/06 2770 total posts
Name:
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
Posted by dooodles
I am so sorry your friend is going through this
A friend of mine (guy) went through hel! with his first wife and he still had difficulty getting the marriage annuled through the church.
His wife got jealous when his father became hospitalized with cancer and was given less than 2 months to live. He was VERY close with his Dad and used every single spare moment to spend at the hospital with him. She never stopped giving him grief for spending time with his father and not with her. She ended up leaving after he lost his father because she could not take his grief afterwards. He came home one night from work to find EVERYTHING gone except for an ice cube tray in the freezer and one plate with a fork.
Can you believe after that he still struggled to get the annulment? He was granted it in the end though.
WOW!! That's crazy.
I do feel bad for my friend, but at the same time, this has been dragging on since October. He's shown that he does not want to be in this marriage, and then cries to stay. He basically turned the tables to make it seem like HE needs time to heal, when in fact it's the other way around. I think he's messed with her mind enough and it's time for him to go, but that's just me. She has opted to let him stay in their house for another 2 weeks w/out paying rent so he can find a place, mind you he has family here!! What kind of man is that? He's leaving her ALL the bills to pay (rent, cable, car, food, baby, credit cards) and has the nerve to say he wants to stay there RENT FREE for a month!!! CRAZY!
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| Posted 7/12/07 2:54 PM |
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mitabtrfly
Member since 12/06 2770 total posts
Name:
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
Posted by Kara
Posted by mitabtrfly
Posted by Kara
Posted by mitabtrfly
Posted by Kara
Nothing you've posted shows grounds for a legal annulment in NYS. She will have to get a divorce.
If you're talking about an annulment in the church, you still have to get divorced to legally end the marriage.
Really??? Wow. That's surprising. So what would could be a reason for annullment?
They didn't get married in a church.
What about the fact that he went into the marriage as a lie? Not even that would count? I know she can file for a separation on the grounds of adultery, but at this point it may be best to get divorced right?
Why does she want an annulment over a divorce.
As far as I know (and I'm NOT an expert) the annulment grounds discussing the marriage being based on fraud is NOT satisfied by stating that your husband was cheating on you before you got married.
I don't know that she wants one, but I thought it would be an option as opposed to having to go through a divorce. I guess I was looking at it from my perspective like the marriage really only existed in her mind, not his, so why not annull it and act as if it never happened you know?
I just think it's HORRIBLE that this happened to her, especially since they were together for 3 years prior to getting married, but I guess that goes to show..you don't really know someone. It's just a shame...she's young too.
An annulment requires the same amount of paperwork and expense as a divorce -- and both give you the same result. Nothing truly nullifies the marriage as if it never happened.
An annulment requires a higher burden of proof and corroborating evidence, often from other witnesses.
I don't think she has anything to gain by filing for an annulment over divorce.
Well thanks for clarifying that. Kinda stinks..but what can you do right?
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| Posted 7/12/07 2:55 PM |
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hazeleyes33
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 13060 total posts
Name:
Ginger
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
Posted by Kara
Posted by mitabtrfly
Posted by Kara
Posted by mitabtrfly
Posted by Kara
Nothing you've posted shows grounds for a legal annulment in NYS. She will have to get a divorce.
If you're talking about an annulment in the church, you still have to get divorced to legally end the marriage.
Really??? Wow. That's surprising. So what would could be a reason for annullment?
They didn't get married in a church.
What about the fact that he went into the marriage as a lie? Not even that would count? I know she can file for a separation on the grounds of adultery, but at this point it may be best to get divorced right?
Why does she want an annulment over a divorce.
As far as I know (and I'm NOT an expert) the annulment grounds discussing the marriage being based on fraud is NOT satisfied by stating that your husband was cheating on you before you got married.
I don't know that she wants one, but I thought it would be an option as opposed to having to go through a divorce. I guess I was looking at it from my perspective like the marriage really only existed in her mind, not his, so why not annull it and act as if it never happened you know?
I just think it's HORRIBLE that this happened to her, especially since they were together for 3 years prior to getting married, but I guess that goes to show..you don't really know someone. It's just a shame...she's young too.
An annulment requires the same amount of paperwork and expense as a divorce -- and both give you the same result. An annulment requires a higher burden of proof and corroborating evidence, often from other witnesses. It's much more difficult to get.
I don't think she has anything to gain by filing for an annulment over divorce.
Divorce / separation are NEVER easy... she should talk to a good lawyer who specializes in this area and see what the lawyer has to say.
Really? I know my bil and his ex did NOT have any money at that time so I don't think the annulment cost that much.
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| Posted 7/12/07 2:57 PM |
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Kara
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Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
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They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
Posted by mitabtrfly
Well thanks for clarifying that. Kinda stinks..but what can you do right?
Totally stinks!! for your friend!
I'm sorry she's going through such a rough time.
There really should be no fault divorce in NYS, but that's a whole other argument...
Tell your friend to find a GOOD domestic relations attorney.
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| Posted 7/12/07 2:58 PM |
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mitabtrfly
Member since 12/06 2770 total posts
Name:
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
I defenitely will. Thanks again!!
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| Posted 7/12/07 3:00 PM |
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Kara
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Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
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They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
For an annulment, you basically have to prove that the marriage was never valid to begin with -- i.e., it was based on fraud, one party was underaged, you married a relative, one party was married to someone else at the time the marriage took place, or the person tricked you into marrying them. These facts just don't add up to that. Even if he was cheating on her when they got married, I don't know if that amounts to fraud sufficient to say that the marriage was never legally valid.
You can have an expensive or inexpensive divorce or an expensive or inexpensive annulment. In this case, I don't see the grounds for annulment existing - but I am not a divorce lawyer. Tell her to talk to a good one SOON. Many attorneys will offer low-cost or free consulations.
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| Posted 7/12/07 3:02 PM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
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They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
Posted by mitabtrfly
Posted by Kara
I defenitely will. Thanks again!!
You're welcome. I don't know the ins and outs of this too well, but these are my impressions from what you've said.
Hopefully she will find a lawyer soon who can give her good advice!!
Good luck to her!!
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| Posted 7/12/07 3:03 PM |
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dooodles
When you wish upon a star
Member since 5/05 11997 total posts
Name:
Because 2 people fell in love
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
Message edited 7/12/2007 3:07:20 PM.
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| Posted 7/12/07 3:05 PM |
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dooodles
When you wish upon a star
Member since 5/05 11997 total posts
Name:
Because 2 people fell in love
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
Posted by dooodles
Posted by Kara
Posted by dooodles
I am so sorry your friend is going through this
A friend of mine (guy) went through hel! with his first wife and he still had difficulty getting the marriage annuled through the church.
His wife got jealous when his father became hospitalized with cancer and was given less than 2 months to live. He was VERY close with his Dad and used every single spare moment to spend at the hospital with him. She never stopped giving him grief for spending time with his father and not with her. She ended up leaving after he lost his father because she could not take his grief afterwards. He came home one night from work to find EVERYTHING gone except for an ice cube tray in the freezer and one plate with a fork.
Can you believe after that he still struggled to get the annulment? He was granted it in the end though.
She is talking about a legal annulment in NYS, not having the church annul the marriage.
Just letting her know - it is my only form of reference for her
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| Posted 7/12/07 3:07 PM |
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MrsRbk
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Michelle
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Re: Can a marriage be annulled after 1 year? (details inside)
Posted by hazeleyes33
Posted by Kara
Posted by mitabtrfly
Posted by Kara
Posted by mitabtrfly
Posted by Kara
Nothing you've posted shows grounds for a legal annulment in NYS. She will have to get a divorce.
If you're talking about an annulment in the church, you still have to get divorced to legally end the marriage.
Really??? Wow. That's surprising. So what would could be a reason for annullment?
They didn't get married in a church.
What about the fact that he went into the marriage as a lie? Not even that would count? I know she can file for a separation on the grounds of adultery, but at this point it may be best to get divorced right?
Why does she want an annulment over a divorce.
As far as I know (and I'm NOT an expert) the annulment grounds discussing the marriage being based on fraud is NOT satisfied by stating that your husband was cheating on you before you got married.
I don't know that she wants one, but I thought it would be an option as opposed to having to go through a divorce. I guess I was looking at it from my perspective like the marriage really only existed in her mind, not his, so why not annull it and act as if it never happened you know?
I just think it's HORRIBLE that this happened to her, especially since they were together for 3 years prior to getting married, but I guess that goes to show..you don't really know someone. It's just a shame...she's young too.
An annulment requires the same amount of paperwork and expense as a divorce -- and both give you the same result. An annulment requires a higher burden of proof and corroborating evidence, often from other witnesses. It's much more difficult to get.
I don't think she has anything to gain by filing for an annulment over divorce.
Divorce / separation are NEVER easy... she should talk to a good lawyer who specializes in this area and see what the lawyer has to say.
Really? I know my bil and his ex did NOT have any money at that time so I don't think the annulment cost that much.
The difference is (and I'm not a laywer, I just know from my DH's experience) is that with an annullment, it's like the marriage never happened. It nulls and voids the marriage.
When we filed for our marriage licence, DH was not required to indicate a previous marriage, had he been divorced, he would have had to indicate a previous marriage and show that the divorce was final.
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| Posted 7/12/07 4:21 PM |
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