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HarleyGirlFLA
Come on in
Member since 5/05 9674 total posts
Name:
Mel
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Can I ask
Please do NOT take this as me being mean or insensitive, I just want to understand since I am not in the TTC boat yet...
what makes you ladies upset about the process? Is it the wait, the months of trying, etc...
Please I dont want anyone to be offended by the question I do want to listen to you ladies and help as best as I can but I dont ever want to offend anyone.
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Posted 5/12/05 10:27 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
juju
Welcome to the World!
Member since 5/05 6747 total posts
Name:
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Re: Can I ask
For some of us, we have been trying for a while. I've been trying for a little over a year. It's frustrating. Some of us have fertility issues and others don't.
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| Posted 5/12/05 10:47 PM |
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HarleyGirlFLA
Come on in
Member since 5/05 9674 total posts
Name:
Mel
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Re: Can I ask
Lots of hugs to you and all the ladies that have been trying.
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| Posted 5/12/05 10:55 PM |
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CookiePuss
Cake from Outer Space!
Member since 5/05 14021 total posts
Name:
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Re: Can I ask
Some women on here have been trying for a very long time and I really feel for them. As for me, I haven't been trying all that long but what makes me upset is that I thought it was going to happen right away and it didn't. Because it is a little more time consuming and difficult then anticipated, it becomes disheartening and depressing. It is hard to explain until you get the disappointment a couple of months in a row.
I think it also has to do with the fear of the unknown and a feeling of impotence (for lack of a better word). A lot of us are goal oriented and used to working towards what we want. This isn't something that we can work to achieve or get better at. We can't go back and redo it. We have to wait for our monthly opportunity. As for the fear of the unknown, for me at least, I have never tried to get pregnant before so I have no idea what to expect and you begin to worry that everything isn't working right. So you worry about that.
All in all, it is hard to explain but this is kind of how I have felt.
Message edited 5/13/2005 7:44:59 AM.
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| Posted 5/13/05 7:30 AM |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name:
The cure IS worse!
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Re: Can I ask
It is the wait, it is the trying, its the failure, it's the way you feel about yourself, its about the way others look at you, it's about how infertility changes you, its about how it also changes your relationship.
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| Posted 5/13/05 7:43 AM |
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HarleyGirlFLA
Come on in
Member since 5/05 9674 total posts
Name:
Mel
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Re: Can I ask
You ladies are so strong.
Baby dust to all of you
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| Posted 5/13/05 7:56 AM |
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Cheryl
Horray for 3 boys!!
Member since 5/05 2354 total posts
Name:
Mikey, Greg & TJ's Mommy
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Re: Can I ask
I have been trying for 2 months now... Not long at all, but I know what is going to get me-- the fact that I usually ALWAYS get what I want, when I want it. I work hard towards it, set it as a goal and I do what it takes to make it happen.
With TTC, it doesn't work that way. Just knowing that already frustrates the CRAP out of me.
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| Posted 5/13/05 10:33 AM |
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juju
Welcome to the World!
Member since 5/05 6747 total posts
Name:
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Re: Can I ask
Posted by shamrock12472
Some women on here have been trying for a very long time and I really feel for them. As for me, I haven't been trying all that long but what makes me upset is that I thought it was going to happen right away and it didn't. Because it is a little more time consuming and difficult then anticipated, it becomes disheartening and depressing. It is hard to explain until you get the disappointment a couple of months in a row.
I think it also has to do with the fear of the unknown and a feeling of impotence (for lack of a better word). A lot of us are goal oriented and used to working towards what we want. This isn't something that we can work to achieve or get better at. We can't go back and redo it. We have to wait for our monthly opportunity. As for the fear of the unknown, for me at least, I have never tried to get pregnant before so I have no idea what to expect and you begin to worry that everything isn't working right. So you worry about that.
All in all, it is hard to explain but this is kind of how I have felt.
That is exactly how I feel!
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| Posted 5/13/05 10:37 AM |
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FeliciaDP
♥
Member since 5/05 18599 total posts
Name:
Mommy
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Re: Can I ask
Posted by shamrock12472
Some women on here have been trying for a very long time and I really feel for them. As for me, I haven't been trying all that long but what makes me upset is that I thought it was going to happen right away and it didn't. Because it is a little more time consuming and difficult then anticipated, it becomes disheartening and depressing. It is hard to explain until you get the disappointment a couple of months in a row.
I think it also has to do with the fear of the unknown and a feeling of impotence (for lack of a better word). A lot of us are goal oriented and used to working towards what we want. This isn't something that we can work to achieve or get better at. We can't go back and redo it. We have to wait for our monthly opportunity. As for the fear of the unknown, for me at least, I have never tried to get pregnant before so I have no idea what to expect and you begin to worry that everything isn't working right. So you worry about that.
All in all, it is hard to explain but this is kind of how I have felt.
SO well said..
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| Posted 5/13/05 11:19 AM |
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leighla
Support Cancer Research
Member since 5/05 16353 total posts
Name:
Lauren
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Re: Can I ask
I started out saying "I'm not going to stress about this process". This is where I've been so far.
Cycle 1 - AF shows up, I'm a little upset despite myself. DH thinks I'm nuts.
Cycle 2 - AF shows up late, thereby getting my hopes up. When she comes it is really upsetting. I cry. DH is concerned, but thinks I'm nuts. I start charting. I buy 4 HPTs, POAS - all BFNs.
Cycle 3 - Definite pregnancy signs, AF is late. I'm convinced that we have conceived. Not only does Aunt Flow show up, she brings a rage like I have never seen. Now I start to think "we're we pregnant and it didn't take?" I'm devastated, but don't share it with DH this time. I continue charting and add on a saliva based OPK. Take 3 HPTs, all BFNs.
Cycle 4 - Can't seem to figure out when I Ovulate. Find out I have 51 day cycles, so I ovulate half the time of a normal female. Which means half the opportunities to get pregnant. AF comes again. We rename her TBAF (that b!tch Aunt Flo). DH is getting concerned now too, but still trying to put on a brave face. I continue charting & saliva test & add on CM tracking to the charts. 3 HPTs again, all BFNs. Every time I see that one line stare back at me I want to cry.
Cycle 5 - More pregnancy signs. I'm cautiously sure that we've conceived. Which basically means I'm a split personality - every thought alternates between "This is a definite pregnancy sign" and "This is just AF coming". AF comes on day 51, like my new clockwork. I cry for 3 days. DH is upset this time too. The charting continues, added on OPKs during "projected" ovulation time.
Cycle 6 - current status. Using an OPK every day. At $20/7 tests a box that's $140 I spent on OPKs alone this month...not to mention the HPTs that I've been sneaking in. DH and I are BD every other day. I gave up on charting, because it's showing no pattern after 6 months. The OPKs are telling me that I have no O...making an appointment with the doctor. The site of a pregnant woman makes me want to cry. AF is due in 2 weeks. The waiting begins.
It's like to matter how emotionally mature and stable you are to begin with, this process tries to break you down. It's only though this site and the support of DH and some of my friends that I'm making it through.
Message edited 5/13/2005 11:44:53 AM.
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| Posted 5/13/05 11:42 AM |
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MrsJ
I love my Katie Bug
Member since 5/05 11357 total posts
Name:
Kathy
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Re: Can I ask
Lauren
I'm sorry....6 months is a long time, I'm right there with you.
Why don't you buy the cheapie OPKs off the Internet? I bought a bunch of them and ended up paying about .50 cents for each of them. WAY cheaper!
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| Posted 5/13/05 12:11 PM |
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leighla
Support Cancer Research
Member since 5/05 16353 total posts
Name:
Lauren
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Re: Can I ask
Posted by kelleherkm
Lauren
I'm sorry....6 months is a long time, I'm right there with you.
Why don't you buy the cheapie OPKs off the Internet? I bought a bunch of them and ended up paying about .50 cents for each of them. WAY cheaper!
Thanks!!
I'm going to try that next month - I foolishly thought "I won't need the OPKs for too long" and $140 later....
6 months is nothing compared to some of the girls here, I know, but it feels like an eternity. I get inspiration from the girls who've been trying for a lot longer and still remain positive!
Baby dust to all!!
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| Posted 5/13/05 1:21 PM |
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-Lisa-
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Member since 5/05 6530 total posts
Name:
Lisa
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Re: Can I ask
Posted by leighla
Can't seem to figure out when I Ovulate. Find out I have 51 day cycles, so I ovulate half the time of a normal female. Which means half the opportunities to get pregnant.
I could have written this...
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| Posted 5/13/05 2:37 PM |
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leighla
Support Cancer Research
Member since 5/05 16353 total posts
Name:
Lauren
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Re: Can I ask
Posted by LisaR
Posted by leighla
Can't seem to figure out when I Ovulate. Find out I have 51 day cycles, so I ovulate half the time of a normal female. Which means half the opportunities to get pregnant.
I could have written this...
We should start a 51 club!! It really does stink, doesn't it?
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| Posted 5/13/05 2:40 PM |
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-Lisa-
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Member since 5/05 6530 total posts
Name:
Lisa
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Re: Can I ask
Posted by leighla
We should start a 51 club!! It really does stink, doesn't it?
yup, though in my case, it would have to be a 45-59 club. I'm not even consistent enough to have 51 all the time 
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| Posted 5/13/05 2:53 PM |
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FeliciaDP
♥
Member since 5/05 18599 total posts
Name:
Mommy
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Re: Can I ask
Posted by LisaR
Posted by leighla
We should start a 51 club!! It really does stink, doesn't it?
yup, though in my case, it would have to be a 45-59 club. I'm not even consistent enough to have 51 all the time
This would be my type of club too !!
I range anywhere from 40-55 days and sometimes LONGER
Its hard enough TTC when you have a fairly regular cycle, but when you are this irregular it throws yet another factor in which it becomes so diffcult to determine your ovulation date 
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| Posted 5/13/05 2:55 PM |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name:
The cure IS worse!
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Re: Can I ask
OMG ladies
That has got to be sooo fustrating!
I am so sorry that youhave to deal with it.
ETA
Have any of you thought to go on clomid...it might force ovulation sooner and shorten you cycles, I think.
It might be good to talk to your dr's about.
Message edited 5/13/2005 3:22:33 PM.
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| Posted 5/13/05 3:21 PM |
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-Lisa-
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Member since 5/05 6530 total posts
Name:
Lisa
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Re: Can I ask
Posted by DebG
Have any of you thought to go on clomid...it might force ovulation sooner and shorten you cycles, I think.
It might be good to talk to your dr's about.
This is really our first cycle trying. I didn't know if I was ovulating at all (since previously I would stop charting after 20+ days). I was planning on going back to the Dr (again) after this cycle. But since I had some indication of O this cycle (day 32), we'll see.
I *think* my problem is I'm still regulating after coming off BCPs - its been 6 months but I've heard it can take a year... I've had bloodwork done and its all normal.
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| Posted 5/13/05 3:29 PM |
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MrsJ
I love my Katie Bug
Member since 5/05 11357 total posts
Name:
Kathy
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Re: Can I ask
I dont know what to say but Im sorry your cycles are so out of wack. I agree with Deb, it has to be so frustrating. My O was 6 days late and I was freaking out.
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| Posted 5/13/05 3:31 PM |
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HarleyGirlFLA
Come on in
Member since 5/05 9674 total posts
Name:
Mel
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Re: Can I ask
Ladies you always have all of us here to talk to. I may not have the words but I'll sure listen
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| Posted 5/13/05 8:01 PM |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name:
The cure IS worse!
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Re: Can I ask
Posted by HarleyGirlFLA
Ladies you always have all of us here to talk to. I may not have the words but I'll sure listen
Aww that is sweet of you.
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| Posted 5/13/05 8:38 PM |
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