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Angel321
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Member since 4/08 15553 total posts
Name:
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Depressing Question - but any help would be appreciated (Spot & I are okay)...
A VERY close friend of my family passed away yesterday...
i'm 7w6d pregnant and while I am upset, VERY upset honestly....i can't stop crying. Just dialing my mom's number at work (her manager/close friend is the one who passed away)....made me sob to the point of having to hang up before my mom answered....
I know i'm truly devestated (this woman was the sweetest, most caring woman you could ever have the privildege to know), but the hormones are making this almost unbearable...
My parents' don't yet know that i'm pregnant...how on earth am I going to explain the hysterics (not telling them until Thanksgiving)? They called me 3 times yesterday to 'check on me' after the initial 'she's passed away' call, because i took the news so hard....
Is there ANYTHING on this earth that I can take to calm me down and help me get through the wake? I know I can't do the funeral, i just flat out, wouldn't be able to handle it....if i can't handle dialing a phone, forget it....
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Posted 11/3/08 11:53 AM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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hmm8191
My loves
Member since 3/06 2908 total posts
Name:
Heather
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Re: Depressing Question - but any help would be appreciated (Spot & I are okay)...
Have you thought at all about telling your Mom now? Maybe it would help her through this hard time too?
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| Posted 11/3/08 11:58 AM |
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Angel321
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Member since 4/08 15553 total posts
Name:
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Re: Depressing Question - but any help would be appreciated (Spot & I are okay)...
Posted by hmm8191
Have you thought at all about telling your Mom now? Maybe it would help her through this hard time too?
I truly wish i could, but i can't. I have to protect myself.
To be frank, my mom is an alcoholic and when she drinks, she says VERY mean things....and as of late, it's like she has completely lost her 'edit' button.
If, GOD FORBID, the worst thing happened, she would blame me and say things like, 'what did you do to cause this? it's all your fault because you had this or that'. I would be doing enough of that to myself, God forbid, I wouldn't need that on top of it.
I know that part of my sadness is that if i HAD told my mom - she would've told her boss IMMEDIATELY and she would've been over the MOON for us....but i know that now, she knows...
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| Posted 11/3/08 12:04 PM |
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MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Depressing Question - but any help would be appreciated (Spot & I are okay)...
Have you ever tried meditation? It is not something that you can learn in a day, but I really find that it helped me tremendously when I was having anger management issues.
I am so sorry to hear about your loss
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| Posted 11/3/08 12:26 PM |
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Ready4Baby
LIF Infant
Member since 10/08 147 total posts
Name:
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Re: Depressing Question - but any help would be appreciated (Spot & I are okay)...
ugh I'm so sorry this loss has hit you so hard. I can imagine the hormones aren't helping.
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| Posted 11/3/08 5:14 PM |
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randella
Love my little man
Member since 8/05 16290 total posts
Name:
Randi
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Re: Depressing Question - but any help would be appreciated (Spot & I are okay)...
Posted by MsMBV
Have you ever tried meditation? It is not something that you can learn in a day, but I really find that it helped me tremendously when I was having anger management issues.
I am so sorry to hear about your loss
i agree with this--- you cannot take anything right now to calm you, especially in the first tri. but, check with your doc.
i'm sorry for your loss.
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| Posted 11/3/08 5:17 PM |
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CkGm
They get so big, so fast :(
Member since 5/05 13848 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: Depressing Question - but any help would be appreciated (Spot & I are okay)...
I would try talking to a close friend- someone who is a good listener and getting it all out.
You never have to apologize for your emotions- pregnant or not. You loved this person and she is no longer here. You have every right to be as upset as you want.
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| Posted 11/3/08 5:37 PM |
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Angel321
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Member since 4/08 15553 total posts
Name:
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Re: Depressing Question - but any help would be appreciated (Spot & I are okay)...
thank you girls....from the bottom of my heart - thank you.
i think before I go pick up dave from work - i'll have a pity party and just get it ALL out....i haven't had a moment to grieve ALONE since i got word of her passing....so i'll take advantage of my time before I pick him up and let it all go....maybe that'll be helpful.
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| Posted 11/3/08 6:05 PM |
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hmm8191
My loves
Member since 3/06 2908 total posts
Name:
Heather
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Re: Depressing Question - but any help would be appreciated (Spot & I are okay)...
Posted by davenjess
Posted by hmm8191
Have you thought at all about telling your Mom now? Maybe it would help her through this hard time too?
I truly wish i could, but i can't. I have to protect myself.
To be frank, my mom is an alcoholic and when she drinks, she says VERY mean things....and as of late, it's like she has completely lost her 'edit' button.
If, GOD FORBID, the worst thing happened, she would blame me and say things like, 'what did you do to cause this? it's all your fault because you had this or that'. I would be doing enough of that to myself, God forbid, I wouldn't need that on top of it.
I know that part of my sadness is that if i HAD told my mom - she would've told her boss IMMEDIATELY and she would've been over the MOON for us....but i know that now, she knows...
Wow...I'm really sorry. You're really going through a lot! You need to take care of you first and for most. Maybe some prenatal yoga or meditation DVDs might help get you in a half way decent head space.
I'm so sorry!!
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| Posted 11/3/08 6:08 PM |
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luckyinlove
I love my baby girls!
Member since 12/06 2441 total posts
Name:
Lauren
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Re: Depressing Question - but any help would be appreciated (Spot & I are okay)...
If you are crying and upset, I don't think that anyone will look at you oddly. After all, someone close to you has died. What I have noticed though, is that while I do get emotional now that I am preg., it is fleeting, and maybe your emotions will taper off before the wake to a point that you feel is more manageable. You can't take anything to calm you down, definitely not in the 1st trimester, but you can blame any excessive emotions on "that time of the month". Good luck and feel better ! 
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| Posted 11/3/08 6:55 PM |
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sfp0701
Liam's Mommy!
Member since 1/07 9764 total posts
Name:
Tricia
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Re: Depressing Question - but any help would be appreciated (Spot & I are okay)...
When I was pg last year my grandpa passed away suddenly. I was a disaster. More than others. I had to tell everyone and honestly it made it a little better for everyone.
I am so sorry for your loss
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| Posted 11/3/08 7:23 PM |
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Diana712
RIP my beloved Brother Richard
Member since 5/07 6710 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: Depressing Question - but any help would be appreciated (Spot & I are okay)...
Posted by luckyinlove
If you are crying and upset, I don't think that anyone will look at you oddly. After all, someone close to you has died. What I have noticed though, is that while I do get emotional now that I am preg., it is fleeting, and maybe your emotions will taper off before the wake to a point that you feel is more manageable. You can't take anything to calm you down, definitely not in the 1st trimester, but you can blame any excessive emotions on "that time of the month". Good luck and feel better !
I agree with this post.. Your ok to cry,, Its sad everyone crys at wakes.. Just let it out.. I would definately not hold back.. That cant be good at all.. And blame it on the 
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| Posted 11/3/08 7:54 PM |
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