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04bride
I'm a big sister!!!
Member since 5/05 6707 total posts
Name:
Noel
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Dio I send a gift or check??
I am invited to a wedding Pa for a friend of mine.We were a lot closer years ago and he did make the rteip up to Ny for my wedding in 2004. Its a July 4th wedding and with 2 kids its a lot so we arent going.. do i send a check for the amount I would have gieven if we went or do i send a nice gidft off teh registry? Also do i send the check/gift with my rsvp or closer to the wedding?
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Posted 4/30/09 8:23 AM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Dio I send a gift or check??
Send whatever you want.  Seriously - I've done both for OOS weddings and both were appreciated. As the gift giver, you have the power to decide what to give and when to give it.
If I can, I usually send a check with the "no" RSVP or send the gift right around the time I send the RSVP back -- just so I don't forget.
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| Posted 4/30/09 8:25 AM |
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MrsFab
this is bliss.......
Member since 10/08 1234 total posts
Name:
Mb
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Re: Dio I send a gift or check??
I usually send a gift when I am not attending the wedding- especially if its out of town- areas outside NY tend more towards gifts than money from what I have seen hth
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| Posted 4/30/09 8:29 AM |
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ali120206
2 Boys
Member since 7/06 17792 total posts
Name:
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Re: Dio I send a gift or check??
I agree with Kara - send whatever you want.
Usually though for OOT weddings I can't make it to - I send a gift (most of the OOT weddings I've been invited to - gifts are the norm).
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| Posted 4/30/09 8:32 AM |
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04bride
I'm a big sister!!!
Member since 5/05 6707 total posts
Name:
Noel
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Re: Dio I send a gift or check??
Let me add he is from NY she is from PA..he gave me cash for my wedding and it was about 150 for one person which i thought was very decent.
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| Posted 4/30/09 8:35 AM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Dio I send a gift or check??
Posted by 04bride
Let me add he is from NY she is from PA..he gave me cash for my wedding and it was about 150 for one person which i thought was very decent.
I don't think any of that matters. My DH is from central PA. I'm from NY. We got married in NY and got a wide variety of gifts from in-state and out of state people. Send what you're comfortable sending and spend what you're comfortable spending. It shouldn't be tit for tat with wedding gifts -- it's a GIFT. You get to decide what to send. 
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| Posted 4/30/09 8:38 AM |
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04bride
I'm a big sister!!!
Member since 5/05 6707 total posts
Name:
Noel
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Re: Dio I send a gift or check??
I know it shouldnt be but I am just saying he did make the trip from pa for my wedding( granted he has family here so he stayed with them, if we went we woudl have to pay for a hotel) then he gave a nice gift on top of making the effort to drive up on a friday in the summer.
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| Posted 4/30/09 8:44 AM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Dio I send a gift or check??
I still don't see how that should dictate whether you send a check or send a registry gift... Either can be generous and neither would be inappropriate.
Message edited 4/30/2009 8:46:22 AM.
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| Posted 4/30/09 8:46 AM |
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MrsFab
this is bliss.......
Member since 10/08 1234 total posts
Name:
Mb
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Re: Dio I send a gift or check??
It sounds like you want to send money- most people that rsvp'd no to my wedding in October that sent checks gave about $100-$150 hth
My grandmother's cousin sent me a lovely platter and that is one of my most treasured items
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| Posted 4/30/09 8:48 AM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Dio I send a gift or check??
Posted by MrsFab
It sounds like you want to send money- most people that rsvp'd no to my wedding in October that sent checks gave about $100-$150 hth
My grandmother's cousin sent me a lovely platter and that is one of my most treasured items
Most people who did not come to our wedding did not send a gift. The few that did send a gift sent anything from a Tiffany bowl (not on our registry) to checks up to $400 (but that was family). I'd say on average, though, those who didn't attend and did send a gift spent about $125. I think we got more checks than boxed gifts from those who didn't attend.
ETA -- For family or a close friend, I would give whatever I'd normally give if I went to the wedding, though.
Message edited 4/30/2009 9:03:46 AM.
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| Posted 4/30/09 9:02 AM |
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Lillykat
going along for the ride...
Member since 5/05 16253 total posts
Name:
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Re: Dio I send a gift or check??
I wouldn't worry about sending money or a gift either is totally appropriate. The people who RSVP'd no to our wedding - only some sent something - those that did most sent us a gift, few sent money (they were from both in and out of state). In fact many sent something from Tiffany's (vases, bowls, picture frames) where we weren't even registered but they were really nice gifts. I wouldn't worry about what they spent - just give something that you feel is appropriate and what you can afford - be that $80 or 200. Either way it is a nice gesture.
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| Posted 4/30/09 9:07 AM |
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