Do people assume....

that you don't want or aren't going to have children?

Here is the reason for my asking..DH's father & step mother were here staying with us for a couple of weeks (thank god they went home)! His step mother was cleaning out a closet and came across something she decided she was giving to DH's brother that has two small children. She told me that she is giving it (a stuffed Santa Claus) them because they are the only ones with small children and it is not like anyone else will be having a child . It didn't matter to me that she is giving the Santa away, but it was her comment that hurt me and it isn't the first time that she has said something like this to me. Granted DH & I are both older, but I am still capable of having a child and who knows if we will. Vent over...TIA for listenting to my vent.

Re: Do people assume....

Sometimes, yes.

Re: Do people assume....

Our family is always asking us questions, b/c they "worry" that we will not

have children.

Re: Do people assume....

To answer your question, yes, some people do assume that about me.

But based on what your SMIL said, she may not actually think you won't ever have kids... she might have been feeling you out to see what your reaction would be & get information, like if you answered, "Well, you never know, DH and I would like to have kids one day..." Or she could've been trying to make you feel guilty for not giving them more grandchildren.

Anyway, that's just my take on it, coming from a family of nosy people

Re: Do people assume....

Posted by JessInCA

To answer your question, yes, some people do assume that about me.

But based on what your SMIL said, she may not actually think you won't ever have kids... she might have been feeling you out to see what your reaction would be & get information, like if you answered, "Well, you never know, DH and I would like to have kids one day..." Or she could've been trying to make you feel guilty for not giving them more grandchildren.

Anyway, that's just my take on it, coming from a family of nosy people

Re: Do people assume....

wow, i don't blame you for feeling hurt.

me & DH are older also but we are trying to have one. the way i look at it, yes i always wanted children but i have/had no control over fate. it took me a little longer than most to find the man i want to spend the rest of my life with. yes, i will be disappointed if we can't have any children but it won't be the end of the world. there are people in worst circumstances. whatever is meant to be will be. we have to make the most of what we have.

i can't believe comments people make. i don't think couples that don't have children are any less of a couple that do. its either by choice or just the cards they were dealt. i wish people would think before they open their big mouths

ok vent over.

btw, i'm sort of new to this board. hope to be chatting with you more

Re: Do people assume....

Posted by shoegal68

wow, i don't blame you for feeling hurt.

me & DH are older also but we are trying to have one. the way i look at it, yes i always wanted children but i have/had no control over fate. it took me a little longer than most to find the man i want to spend the rest of my life with. yes, i will be disappointed if we can't have any children but it won't be the end of the world. there are people in worst circumstances. whatever is meant to be will be. we have to make the most of what we have.

i can't believe comments people make. i don't think couples that don't have children are any less of a couple that do. its either by choice or just the cards they were dealt. i wish people would think before they open their big mouths

ok vent over.

btw, i'm sort of new to this board. hope to be chatting with you more