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Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

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CathyB

Member since 5/05

19403 total posts

Name:

Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

I just need to get it off my chest. Sorry if it's disjointed, I'm still trying to wrap my head around it all.....

So my dad has been going through a rough time the past 6 months or so. His wife decided to leave him suddenly. They were living in Georgia, and she took a job in Utah and moved there last month. My dad is an alcoholic and was having a tough time dealing with the split, he started drinking and abusing prescription meds. He was in the mental unit of a hospital for about 2 weeks and has been seeing 2 counselors since. Added to it, he has a hard time talking about his feelings, he was mentally and physically abused as a kid. He has no family down in Georgia, we're all up here in NY, NJ and Massachusetts.

Anyway, he said he was doing better, responding to treatment, not drinking, that his counselors were really happy with his progross etc. He said that he and his wife were going to get back together and that he was moving to Utah to be with her. He was supposed to fly here today and stay until Sunday to celebrate Sarah's birthday. My dad and I aren't close (I was very bitter when he cheated on my mom and walked out on us) but we've been working on it over the past few years and it's better.

I got a call this morning from his sister that he tried to commit suicide last night. Turns out his wife doesn't want to get back together, but is concerned about his well being so she's been keeping in touch with him. I guess he misunderstood her concern or whatever. He was drinking and took a whole bunch of pills and called his wife and was telling her all this and she tried to talk him out of it but he said it was too late, it was already done. She called the police and they went over and he'd vomited a lot so it got the pills out of his system. They took him to the ER and they pumped his stomach. Not sure where things stand right now, but I'm guessing that he'll be admitted to the psych ward again.

I have the phone number to the ER. Do you think I should call, or should I give him a few days to calm down? I don't want to make things worse, especially since our relationship is touchy and I don't want to embarass him anymore that I'm sure he already is.

Thanks for listening.

Posted 2/21/06 12:15 PM
 
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MichaelsMommy
Love my son!

Member since 6/05

1468 total posts

Name:
Lauren

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

I'm not sure what I would do, I just want to send you hugs and hope that your Dad is okay. Actually now that I think about it, I would probably call...

Posted 2/21/06 12:20 PM
 

BabyAvocado
Happy New Year

Member since 5/05

17334 total posts

Name:

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

I would say definitely call! I understand that you two aren't close but I can only imagine that a person who attempts suicide must feel impossibly alone. Calling will maybe help show him that he is not.

I hope things get better soon! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/06 12:40 PM
 

anon
where's winter?

Member since 11/05

2209 total posts

Name:

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

Message edited 2/8/2007 11:16:14 AM.

Posted 2/21/06 12:46 PM
 

JRG71
*****************

Member since 5/05

5025 total posts

Name:

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

Posted by BabyAvocado

I would say definitely call! I understand that you two aren't close but I can only imagine that a person who attempts suicide must feel impossibly alone. Calling will maybe help show him that he is not.

I hope things get better soon! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon



I agree 100%

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/06 1:01 PM
 

stayandjohn
Our life is complete

Member since 5/05

5909 total posts

Name:
Stacey

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

Posted by JRG71

Posted by BabyAvocado

I would say definitely call! I understand that you two aren't close but I can only imagine that a person who attempts suicide must feel impossibly alone. Calling will maybe help show him that he is not.

I hope things get better soon! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon



I agree 100%

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon



I have to agree as well. I hope your father gets well soon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/06 1:02 PM
 

sunny
Life is good!

Member since 5/05

8369 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

I am so sorry!

I would call.

Posted 2/21/06 1:03 PM
 

CathyB

Member since 5/05

19403 total posts

Name:

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

Thanks everyone! I just talked to my cousin who's in med school and has worked in the ER. He said that I should call tomorrow once he's been processed and is in a regular room. He said it's too hectic in the ER for them to get him to the phone.

I don't want to wait that long, so I plan on trying first this evening, hopefully by then he'll be in a regular room.

Thanks again.

Posted 2/21/06 1:11 PM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

Name:

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

I'm FM'ing you.

Posted 2/21/06 1:13 PM
 

justthe4ofus
I hate hypocrites!!!!!

Member since 5/05

6905 total posts

Name:

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

aw Cathy many many Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Definitely call your Dad when you think he will be in a room, he needs to know that he does have people that love him and support him.

Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/06 1:14 PM
 

my3bugs
Mom of 2 Boys

Member since 5/05

4381 total posts

Name:

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

lots of hugs!!! hope all goes well with your phone call. let him know he is not alone.

Posted 2/21/06 1:23 PM
 

Bxgell2
Perfection

Member since 5/05

16438 total posts

Name:
Beth

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

I would call at the first opportunity... it sounds like your father is tremendously lost, sad and lonely, and I'm sure that any effort you make to reach out to him, especially considering the fact that your relationship is strained, will mean more to him than you can imagine. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/06 1:33 PM
 

michele31
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

3372 total posts

Name:
Michele

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

Your dad is obviously hanging on by a thread. But the truth is only he can help himself. I would send him a photo of you and the baby..let him know that despite the problems of the past that you love him and want time to mend your issues. I am very sorry that things have gone to this level...it is truly sad. But in the end he has to want to get better for himself. I hope he finds the strength.

Posted 2/21/06 1:38 PM
 

FelAndJon
needs to update her avatar pic

Member since 6/05

10212 total posts

Name:
Felice (aka LuckyBride2004)

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

Cathy Chat Icon Chat Icon I would definitely call. Like many of the posters have already said, he must be feeling like suicide was the only solution. You need to remind him that he is still a father (regardless of a shaky relationship) and now a grandfather. He needs to know that he is still needed and loved. Also, knowing that he was supposed to fly out to you today, maybe this was a cry for help from you? Maybe, in some really strange way, this is how he is reaching out to you?
I am so sorry that you are going through this. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/06 2:40 PM
 

GraciesMom
LIF Adult

Member since 7/05

1636 total posts

Name:

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

I am so sorry you are going through this. I hope your father gets the help he needs. I think you will feel so much better if you call him. I'm sure it will mean a lot to him.Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/06 2:52 PM
 

NovemberSue
LIF Adolescent

Member since 11/05

671 total posts

Name:
Susan

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

Wow, that is a tough one. I guess do what you feel would be best in your heart. Perhaps knowing that you care and want to be sure he is ok, would be good for him to hear. I don't know. Is there anyone there with him you can ask? Good luck.

Posted 2/21/06 4:23 PM
 

iffer042373
5 weeks till I'm a big sister

Member since 5/05

2642 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

Posted by BabyAvocado

I would say definitely call! I understand that you two aren't close but I can only imagine that a person who attempts suicide must feel impossibly alone. Calling will maybe help show him that he is not.

I hope things get better soon! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon



I am sorry your going through this I agree with babyavocado and I would call

Posted 2/21/06 4:33 PM
 

mommy2Alex
3 babies for me :)

Member since 5/05

6683 total posts

Name:

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

Posted by FelAndJon

Cathy Chat Icon Chat Icon I would definitely call. Like many of the posters have already said, he must be feeling like suicide was the only solution. You need to remind him that he is still a father (regardless of a shaky relationship) and now a grandfather. He needs to know that he is still needed and loved. Also, knowing that he was supposed to fly out to you today, maybe this was a cry for help from you? Maybe, in some really strange way, this is how he is reaching out to you?
I am so sorry that you are going through this. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon



I agree as well. I hope your dad gets better soon.

Posted 2/21/06 7:25 PM
 

Tumbalina
Better than the news!

Member since 2/06

2840 total posts

Name:
Angela

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

Call him. I am sure he would love to hear your voice. Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/06 8:27 PM
 

waytogo
Balancing act on a highwire

Member since 5/05

1292 total posts

Name:
a

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

Oh my you must be having a tough time Chat Icon

What is your gut instinct to do? Maybe you can even call the ED staff and fill them in on what's been going on...

Posted 2/21/06 9:45 PM
 

pnm1654
Mommy to 2 boys!

Member since 5/05

4565 total posts

Name:

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

I'm so sorryChat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/06 9:49 PM
 

Holly
Prayers to those who need them

Member since 5/05

6631 total posts

Name:
Holly

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

putting the past aside, I would call him to tell him you love him and support himChat Icon

Posted 2/21/06 10:04 PM
 

dawnygirl25
Growing up soo fast..

Member since 1/06

14917 total posts

Name:
Dawn

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

Im sending you FM

Posted 2/21/06 10:20 PM
 

CunningOne
***

Member since 5/05

26975 total posts

Name:

Re: Don't know where to post this, and I'm most comfortable over here

So sorry about your dad. I would definitely call. I hope your call is a good one, let us know how it goes! Chat Icon

Posted 2/21/06 10:26 PM
 
 

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