Going insane...longgg vent, don't even know if it makes sense, lol.

I have 4 days until my due date and I am going insane!! I am soo uncomfortable and in tons of pain. I used to say it felt like I had been horseback riding all day but now I think its 10x worse, like someone has put hot coals in my hooha

I am also so sick of myself, lol. I feel sorry for anyone who has to deal with me so I have just been secluding myself and being miserable alone. I sat in my shower last night for 1/2 an hour crying hysterically b/c I didn't want DH hearing me and having to deal with my crazy emotions (he has put his dues in)

I really thought I would have had this baby by now b/c a few weeks ago I was contracting like crazy, I have done every stupid old wives tale and obviously that's all they are!

And I have the added stress of my sister getting married June 12th so everyone in my family is pushing for me to go into labor soon (like I can freakin help it)!!! I am gonna be a hot mess on her wedding day (physically and mentally)!! I think I will have to bring my newborn, I really don't think I can leave him with someone being so new to the world, I feel horrible exposing him to people so soon (even though I got a matching sling to my hideous maternity dress so he will be somewhat protected)

My sister is obviously obsessed with her wedding right now (she should be!) and I just feel like I am pushing myself to do too much, like her fitting and hair/makeup things, veil shopping, seating chart help, etc. I really don't think my family realized how much pain I am in and how much I am a mess as soon as I am alone...

My sister doesn't realize how her wedding weekend is going to be a lot for me to do, she asked if I could leave the baby in bridal suite and use a monitor!?!?! LOL! NO WAY!! But I am trying my best to do everything I can for her and not take away from her special day. I really don't even know what I am gonna do w/baby logistically ...

I am just SUPER stressed that I am gonna have my baby and then have this crazy weekend to deal with within a couple of weeks (rehearsal dinner Friday, Sat-wedding from 7:30 am (for hair and makeup) till god knows how long, cocktail hour starts at 7pm! Then Sunday she is having a thank you breakfast and then a dinner!! How will I survive????

I have not slept in days it feels like, I am up till 3/4 in the morning and then crash out of exhaustion, it is all just getting to me and I knw its not healthy, I need to chill out but its really hard.

Ok vent over, I just can't really let my family know how much this is stressing me out b/c they all have their own stresses right now and the wedding/baby coming is a lot for everyone.

Thanks for letting me vent if I got this far, I know I prob sound like a whiny brat but I am just DONE!

Re: Going insane...longgg vent, don't even know if it makes sense, lol.

I totally feel your pain. Last night I was walking in circles crying because I was in so much pain and so uncomfortable. I finally crashed at 6am only to be woken up by my DD at 8am. Tonight I have a feeling it is going to be a repeat I hope the end is near for you! I am having a repeat c/s on Tuesday and it cannot come fast enough.

As for the wedding....do the best you can. You will have a brand new baby and people are just going to have to understand that. Is your DH in the wedding party? Maybe he could take the baby for the majority of the day?

Lots of

Re: Going insane...longgg vent, don't even know if it makes sense, lol.

Honestly, ask a good friend who has/had a baby to watch your newborn. Exposing her to all those people on your sister's wedding day is worse than leaving her with one person you trust.

Plus they can hang with your DS/DD (?) at home and you can try to enjoy yourself! It sounds like this is a huge part of your stress and it shouldn't be!



Deep breaths, you're almost there!!!!!!!!!!

Re: Going insane...longgg vent, don't even know if it makes sense, lol.

Posted by nicrae

I totally feel your pain. Last night I was walking in circles crying because I was in so much pain and so uncomfortable. I finally crashed at 6am only to be woken up by my DD at 8am. Tonight I have a feeling it is going to be a repeat I hope the end is near for you! I am having a repeat c/s on Tuesday and it cannot come fast enough.

As for the wedding....do the best you can. You will have a brand new baby and people are just going to have to understand that. Is your DH in the wedding party? Maybe he could take the baby for the majority of the day?

Lots of

Re: Going insane...longgg vent, don't even know if it makes sense, lol.

Posted by KittyGags

Honestly, ask a good friend who has/had a baby to watch your newborn. Exposing her to all those people on your sister's wedding day is worse than leaving her with one person you trust.

Plus they can hang with your DS/DD (?) at home and you can try to enjoy yourself! It sounds like this is a huge part of your stress and it shouldn't be!



Deep breaths, you're almost there!!!!!!!!!!

Message edited 5/23/2010 12:22:04 AM.

Re: Going insane...longgg vent, don't even know if it makes sense, lol.

I read the posts of a lot of first time moms who expect to go into labor early. And I remember thinking the same thing when I had DD. I was 6 days late. And basically induced (scraped my membranes). So I feel your pain.

It's going to be a tough weekend. I'm not going to lie. But you will get thru it. Fortunately the baby will not be doing much, so you can keep DC in the stroller most of the time. You will need DH to be your support since the rest of your family will be very wrapped up in the wedding. Maybe get him to take the night feedings the night before the wedding, so you can rest. Talk to him about it and come up with a plan.

You will be tired. But you will also have that excitment for your sister and that should help you get thru the day.

ETA I would start pumping from the beginning if you plan on BFing. This way DH can give him bottles if needed during times like the ceremony and intros and pictures.

Message edited 5/23/2010 8:07:28 AM.