One week ago today, I lost my precious Dad...my hero...the first man I ever loved. I am absolutely heartbroken and if I look at the road ahead, I feel like I am going to fall to pieces.
He suffered with one lung and emphysema since 1996. Fighter wasnt the word for him. He only got oxygen this past October when he was hospitalized for pneumonia. He slowed down so much..couldnt be the person he used to be anymore and since being put on the oxygen, hardly left the house. He suffered IMMENSELY and would tell me all the time how he prayed that God would just take him.
Last week he was admitted with a bad cough. I thought it was pneumonia again. First and second day he was awake, fighting the doctors, wanted to go home. Great sign to me! I was in complete denial when by the 3rd day he had stopped speaking and was suffering to catch a breath. He slept a lot and we could tell he was in pain. We started a bit of morphine to keep him comfortable. By the 4th day a doctor told us that this was basically the end. His lung was shutting down. He told us how it would play out. Basically he was asleep but could still hear us. They said his blood pressure would drop and he would slowly slip away. So we had our time with him. We never left his side. He passed away with me, my brother, my sister and my Mother by his side...peacefully.
It was the best scenario we could have asked for..especially for an emphysema patient. but my heart is broken. We had his funeral mass and sent him to be cremated on my birthday. It will never be the same. Life will never be the same. I turned 36 last week but somehow this loss has shrunk me down to being 5 again. I miss my Daddy and while I know he's not suffering anymore..I wish with all my heart he didnt have to go. I love you Dad. May you RIP now.
I'm SO sorry for your loss. I lost my Dad in July and its sucks so much that it physically hurts.
You will be going through a lot of emotions in the coming months. The pain never eases or goes away, but daily life does get a little easier. It still consumes a lot of my thoughts all day.
I am so sorry Losing a parent is incredibly difficult...By far the worst thing I've delt with in my 33 years is losing my Mom....I will never, ever get over it...That being said..it does get easier as the months and now year has gone by....
You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers...Please feel free to message me if you ever need to chat
